Karlise13 Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 HOly ****... DuDe! You are one ****ed up DUDE! Girlfriend, you have every right to be horrified. This guy is a crackpot! Damn...
Naive Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 WTF!!!!!!!! You got busted! What's the whole point of lying and then have her come on here and read it!
MMBastard Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Originally posted by ssssss Why don't you ask HIM where did he sleep last night? And the night before that and...Left your wife? How stupid do you think I am you f....ing idot? You really think I care about your stupid messages, e-mails and the rest of your crap? And for those of you who actually believed in his lies-you have no idea how far he can go with lies and manipulation and how sick he is (can you believe he actually e-mailed me copy of his "divorce papers" which he typed by himself???) The interesting fact is that there is no divorce, his wife doesn't know anything and he goes home to her every night, sleeps with her and then sends me million messages during week accusing me of not being there for him and turning my back to "real" love, and still has no shame to come to this forum and talk about how he loves me and all that crap. (He e-mailed me link to this page saying he really understands how I feel and he wants me to read how you guys kicked his ass...) Now how sick is that? You really are a bastard and you deserve everything Mr Spock and everyone else told you. At the end, only thing I can say to you is F**K OFF you F****ING PSYCHO!!!! You really are a bastard! And yes, I am the girl that was crazy enough to spend the last 9 months of her life with someone like him. BIG mistake! I told you this a million times....you are welcome to come and talk to my wife.....see what she knows. And yes I did send her a link to this page....mostly to let her know I now understand how she felt. Reading what you guys write here was a very mind opening experience (especially cause i did get "my ass kicked" so much). I expected what was written in the post, and I can't honestly fight that, due to everything I lied about in the past. Again, if you want the truth- come talk to my wife....see what she knows. If you wanna rely on the gossip and ****, your choice, I'm giving you the opportunity to find out the truth.............however, i know you wont do that............
MMBastard Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Maaaan, I gotta write more..................explain some things......not to justify myself or anything as this never was the reason for coming to this forum. Most of my posts out here were before I even considered sending her a link. The reason i did is simply because for the first time, by reading your posts, I truly understood how much I've hurt her and how much damage I inflicted. That's it. There are no hidden masochistic reasons, (again) need to justify anything.... When going to forums (in general) i never post or reply.....this is the first time I actually replied to people with my own experiences and it has made me feel so much better....the feeling of contributing rather than simply taking is pretty rewarding, a new momentum in my life (in so many aspects). Now, going back to the above. When I read her post, my first reaction was to attack, defend myself (which I did) and return an insult (which I also did).....I am now sorry for that. Anyways, she has every right to attack me and insult me the way she did. I told her several times before she was welcome to talk to my wife and anyone else involved in the situation for that matter. I told her she could call or come by my house at any time, day or night, to check up on what I'm doing, where I am...... as right now this is the ONLY way she'd find out the truth. All this is something that was so out of the question when things were "secret". And darn, I would love her to do that, it would clear up so many things. However, I know she never will, she doesn't have the guts for that. And I can't blame her for that. I know you'll all go, well why the hell are you staying with your wife if you guys are separated..... Well, I have for the past five days when I moved out from my moms (sssssss is pretty familiar with the reasons for that). My wife and I sleep in separate rooms (i know, i know........how common....but also very verifiable) and the only reason for me not rushing out and getting my own new place is there is really no purpose in rushing that (now that sssss and I r not together)....plus I do get to see my kid every day this way. However, she also knows that if she asked me to I'd get a place the same day - no questions asked. Here I go justifying myself again, and I didn't wanna go there.... Now I know so many are gonna go "he's bull****tin'" but i don't give a flyin' f. I've gonne lie and bull**** free since fessin' up to all and i feel good about this although it really paid off. Oh well....................
MMBastard Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Originally posted by MMBastard I've gonne lie and bull**** free since fessin' up to all and i feel good about this although it really paid off. Oh well.................... I was gonna say: hasn't paid off.......... BTW, has there ever been a 1 on 1 like this here?????
meanon Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 MMB, she's not relying on the gossip, it's not that she hasn't got the guts for it. Your gf is acting on what she knows of you - what you have taught her to expect. You are still blaming her and evading responsibility for your actions. What about your other thread? The one where you complain that the reason you didn't leave your wife sooner was because your gf didn't give you the type of support you needed, while all the time you were lying to her? You say you accept you are getting what you deserve yet time and again your posts show you still haven't quite got it, or else you are still lying. This isn't love, MMB. You know so little about how your actions have hurt her that total strangers have had to explain it to you. That's what we are here for, I point this out only to illustrate how little you understand her and you can't love what you don't know. Love means caring for someone else, protecting them. You act only in your own self interest. If you are being honest now that's only because it suits you: If being together is ultimately what we wanted - should anything else matter (even lying - which really is pretty common for MM)? If lying doesn't matter then who's to say you won't do it again if you feel it's justified in terms of you getting what you want? You live in a small village, if you get divorced she will find out. You are in no position to demand that she talks to your wife, why should she open her heart again to risk, to hope? You have no right to ask it of her. It's far too late but the way to have made amends would have been to accept that her doubts are entirely reasonable and to have moved out, rather than blaming her for not trusting you. MMB you have learned a harsh lesson. Chalk it up to experience and begin to think about how you can sustain meaningful relationships in the future. Start with thinking about what you can do to help this girl, to make amends for the damage you have done. She is asking you to leave her alone. Why aren't you listening to her? Does what she want count for so little when weighed against what you want? Isn't that what part of the problem has been? Next, think about your wife and child whose future you have jeopardized in pursuit of this pipe dream. In short, think of others for a while, rather than just yourself. You will learn a lot, MMB and be happier in the future for it. Good Luck
CCBD Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Originally posted by ssssss Why don't you ask HIM where did he sleep last night? And the night before that and...Left your wife? How stupid do you think I am you f....ing idot? You really think I care about your stupid messages, e-mails and the rest of your crap? And for those of you who actually believed in his lies-you have no idea how far he can go with lies and manipulation and how sick he is (can you believe he actually e-mailed me copy of his "divorce papers" which he typed by himself???) The interesting fact is that there is no divorce, his wife doesn't know anything and he goes home to her every night, sleeps with her and then sends me million messages during week accusing me of not being there for him and turning my back to "real" love, and still has no shame to come to this forum and talk about how he loves me and all that crap. (He e-mailed me link to this page saying he really understands how I feel and he wants me to read how you guys kicked his ass...) Now how sick is that? You really are a bastard and you deserve everything Mr Spock and everyone else told you. At the end, only thing I can say to you is F**K OFF you F****ING PSYCHO!!!! You really are a bastard! And yes, I am the girl that was crazy enough to spend the last 9 months of her life with someone like him. BIG mistake! Holy Mother Mary...., you are baaaaad!!! I wish I could tell someone off this good! He was very stupid to send this link (and all the other stuff you mentioned). I learned such a good lesson tonight. Girl, give me some of the cajones to tell someone off this good... How does it feel being found out by millions that you are a pathological liar MMBastard? OW (we should have a web site that posts our lovers photos to warn others about them. Wouldn't be surprised if other bas****s had more than one photo since they all seem to be pathological liars. From one that has been lied to (and wished she told him off this way), CC
MMBastard Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Originally posted by meanon MMB, she's not relying on the gossip, it's not that she hasn't got the guts for it. Your gf is acting on what she knows of you - what you have taught her to expect. You are still blaming her and evading responsibility for your actions. What about your other thread? The one where you complain that the reason you didn't leave your wife sooner was because your gf didn't give you the type of support you needed, while all the time you were lying to her? You say you accept you are getting what you deserve yet time and again your posts show you still haven't quite got it, or else you are still lying. This isn't love, MMB. You know so little about how your actions have hurt her that total strangers have had to explain it to you. That's what we are here for, I point this out only to illustrate how little you understand her and you can't love what you don't know. Love means caring for someone else, protecting them. You act only in your own self interest. If you are being honest now that's only because it suits you: If lying doesn't matter then whose to say you won't do it again if you feel it's justified in terms of you getting what you want? You live in a small village, if you get divorced she will find out. You are in no position to demand that she talks to your wife, why should she open her heart again to risk, to hope? You have no right to ask it of her. It's far too late but the way to have made amends would have been to accept that her doubts are entirely reasonable and to have moved out, rather than blaming her for not trusting you. MMB you have learned a harsh lesson. Chalk it up to experience and begin to think about how you can sustain meaningful relationships in the future. Start with thinking about what you can do to help this girl, to make amends for the damage you have done. She is asking you to leave her alone. Why aren't you listening to her? Does what she want count for so little when weighed against what you want? Isn't that what part of the problem has been? Next, think about your wife and child whose future you have jeopardized in pursuit of this pipe dream. In short, think of others for a while, rather than just yourself. You will learn a lot, MMB and be happier in the future for it. Good Luck Meanon, you're right. Certain aspects of your posts I don't agree with but accept them. And no, I won't contact her anymore.
MMBastard Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 This isn't love, MMB. You know so little about how your actions have hurt her that total strangers have had to explain it to you. That's what we are here for, I point this out only to illustrate how little you understand her and you can't love what you don't know. Love means caring for someone else, protecting them. You act only in your own self interest. If you are being honest now that's only because it suits you: If lying doesn't matter then who's to say you won't do it again if you feel it's justified in terms of you getting what you want? .....and please don't think i feel lying is justified. I just pointed out it was so common in these types of relationships....definitely not an excuse. And as i wrote in another post lying is definitely not something I would do if it happened again. Lying is what brought me to lose her and that's it. I tried to pin it to emotional fears (losing her earlier on etc.) but you're right - it was pure selfishness. And no, I'm not blaming it on her. As a matter of fact I have absolutelly no expectations of her anymore. I truly want her to be happy.
meanon Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 I'm bound to be wrong about some things, I've relied only on what you've said here and I'm well aware that it's not the whole story. Sorry if I was too harsh. I'm fairly sure this girl will not come back to you but if there is any hope at all, not contacting her for now is the best thing to do. It at least shows that you are taking her wishes seriously. All the best.
Karlise13 Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 MMBastard, you have NO CLUE Really, just NO CLUE. You're full of explanations. But NO CLUE. Damn. I am just shaking my head here. DAMN I am just blown away by this....
MMBastard Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Originally posted by Karlise13 MMBastard, you have NO CLUE Really, just NO CLUE. You're full of explanations. But NO CLUE. Damn. I am just shaking my head here. DAMN I am just blown away by this.... ??????? I gotta tell ya.......you women....us men.....different universes....i swear. Look y'all, i didn't want to go into explanations....or anything of a sort....so if it got misunersrood i'm sorry............i wanted to understand........Would you actually prefer the "Well f**k u b***h, I'm married, what'd you expect". Well, that ain't me...it never will be. What's unclear to you?????
whichwayisup Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 I wish people could just say what they say without getting mean personal and nasty! We are have feelings here and don't enjoy being attacked!! Even MMB has every right to post and ya know what?? He's been really open and honest! No BS, what you see is what you get basically here. I respect that and anyone else who can really share their feelings and get it down into a post here. Just my 2 cents worth.
MMBastard Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Originally posted by whichwayisup I wish people could just say what they say without getting mean personal and nasty! We are have feelings here and don't enjoy being attacked!! Even MMB has every right to post and ya know what?? He's been really open and honest! No BS, what you see is what you get basically here. I respect that and anyone else who can really share their feelings and get it down into a post here. Just my 2 cents worth. thanks......but understand, i do deserve (and welcome) all the comments - no matter how harsh. I've made lying an art - really have...but I also understand it is truly time to stop. This forum is a strange way of coming clean. I shouldn't have involved ssssss in this but i somehow am glad i did, since everyone gets to know the other side. True, I initially dread posts by Karlise, KissMyTiara and especially EnigmaXOXO but hey, these are all opinions and as such I must honor them. None of these people know me or any of us so they form opinions on the basis of what is written in here. However, this entire topic is so GREY and really not B/W. So, harshly opinionated posts sometimes don't fly well. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t44684/ ....on what posters here want.
guest Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 "My wife and I sleep in separate rooms (i know, i know........how common....but also very verifiable) and the only reason for me not rushing out and getting my own new place is there is really no purpose in rushing that (now that sssss and I r not together)" If you are unhappy enough in your marriage to have an affair you should move out wjether or not you and sss are still together. It's the decent thing to do. let your wife get on with her life. It can't be easy for her and you are being selfish. it is comfotable for you there to share expenses ect. That really why you aren't moving. You should end the marraige and move on regardless of whether you have someone to move on to. it is very very selfish to stay.
whichwayisup Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 I understand that totally. I guess with me being female I do take things to heart and not great on being sh*t on advice/no advice. I agree with you too, more grey, especially when we usually get one side of the story.
ssssss Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Originally posted by whichwayisup I understand that totally. I guess with me being female I do take things to heart and not great on being sh*t on advice/no advice. I agree with you too, more grey, especially when we usually get one side of the story. you understand who? me or him? cause here you have both sides of the story...
ssssss Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 [color=blue]You think you're a player and that you broke my heart but I knew your game right from the start. I saw your game and I played it too, so laugh stupid player cause the game's on you![/color]
ssssss Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Poznato??? "Gosh, I'm just so comfortable talking to you. Can we do lunch sometime?" (Flash forward a week) "I'm having the best time! I love hanging out with you! Can we get together sometime, like on a Saturday?" (Flash forward another two weeks) "God, I didn't plan for this to happen. But I was thinking about kissing you for the longest time. It's just so easy to be with you. You're so cool. I feel so ****ed up about this. But at the same time, I feel just naturally drawn to you," (Flash forward a month) "Hey, I know you've been having mixed feelings about all this. Can we meet at the Country Inn on Route X? Just some drinks and conversations. That's all. I miss you" (Flash forward another month) "I know.... I know...we can't continue like this. You know, I think I'm going to start getting the divorce process going. I really am. You've shown me the light. I can't believe I've let this go on so long. Can we have dinner sometime this week? I miss you. I really do. I need to talk to you." (Flash forward a year) "Oh sweetie...it's so hard. Those three weeks we didn't talk just about killed me. Damn, if I didnt have kids it would be so much easier. Be patient. Can you meet me this weekend at the theater? I just want to spend some time with you. Don't give up on me, OK? OK?"
whichwayisup Posted September 17, 2004 Posted September 17, 2004 Okay, I must have had my head up my *ss or something...Or not keeping awake while reading. I know I've had a killer migraine for day here. I missed all this and now am caught up. This is honestly, abit freaky. MMB and SSSSSSS...lol. I feel for both of you. It happened, it's over. I don't know if posting back and forth is theraputic for each of you, GO FOR IT if it helps, it's just abit creepy that you both ended up on this site together. But that's just my own opinion.
MMBastard Posted September 20, 2004 Posted September 20, 2004 Originally posted by ssssss Poznato??? "Gosh, I'm just so comfortable talking to you. Can we do lunch sometime?" (Flash forward a week) "I'm having the best time! I love hanging out with you! Can we get together sometime, like on a Saturday?" (Flash forward another two weeks) "God, I didn't plan for this to happen. But I was thinking about kissing you for the longest time. It's just so easy to be with you. You're so cool. I feel so ****ed up about this. But at the same time, I feel just naturally drawn to you," (Flash forward a month) "Hey, I know you've been having mixed feelings about all this. Can we meet at the Country Inn on Route X? Just some drinks and conversations. That's all. I miss you" (Flash forward another month) "I know.... I know...we can't continue like this. You know, I think I'm going to start getting the divorce process going. I really am. You've shown me the light. I can't believe I've let this go on so long. Can we have dinner sometime this week? I miss you. I really do. I need to talk to you." (Flash forward a year) "Oh sweetie...it's so hard. Those three weeks we didn't talk just about killed me. Damn, if I didnt have kids it would be so much easier. Be patient. Can you meet me this weekend at the theater? I just want to spend some time with you. Don't give up on me, OK? OK?" O da, pogotovo na kraju.........toliko sakrivanja.......i implikacije na Country Inn.....jednostavno smo se ubijali se*om..... ne opravdavam se....
MMBastard Posted September 20, 2004 Posted September 20, 2004 Sorry about the language change in the above post everybody.......wont happen again....
whichwayisup Posted September 20, 2004 Posted September 20, 2004 Translator Please! Got to admit that gets everyone's attention now!
MMBastard Posted September 20, 2004 Posted September 20, 2004 She asked me if the above "timeline" sounded familiar.... and it does to a large extent.........However, I was just out having a cigarette and thought of that...... I'd be interested in Karlise or Merin, or whoever wrote that writing what their "ideal" timeline would be. If we left our wives straight of the bat..... you'd all be: Well, look at this dude, if he left his wife and child(ren) just like that, what's he gonna do to me???? Some of you'll go: You missed the point, it's about the lies..... and I truly understand that. I am gonna say this with soooooo much humbleness - These relationships start off in a lie...... you'd be truly unhappy and f*cked up if your guy told you (after significant emotional attachment): Well, I ain't leaving my wife. AGAIN, I AM NOT SAYING IT's OK TO LIE - sh*t look what happened to me. Example: When ssssss and I started off I told her I would never leave my wife, and she said she'd never be with me if I left my wife. Well, several months later.....leaving my wife and being with her was the only thing on my mind. Sh*t changes people, changes the way you think,.........
Merin Posted September 20, 2004 Posted September 20, 2004 OMG Damn, see I didn't know until today that your girl had read what you've written... What is the right "timeline" to leave your wife (and let me make this very VERY clear, just because you seperate or divorce or leave the marriage you NEVER EVER leave your little person period) well the best time to get the hell out of the marriage that you aren't happy in would be BEFORE you start messing around with someone else. Damn MM you obviously knew there was something not okay in the marriage BEFORE you met SSSS right? So did you try to get some marraige counseling then or even talk to your wife about things? So you know to late for all that now... what happened happend... however for real, if you wanted to "prove" to SSS that you were sincere, then why didn't you get copies of your divorce papers and have them mailed DIRECTLY from the court house where you've filed and sent to her home? You still live with your wife but in seperate rooms? *cough bulls*** cough* I don't blame her for thinking your full of s*** IF you were sincere then move out, jeez! Don't use your little person as the excuse to continue to do the things you do. You don't have to live with your wife or be married to her for that matter to be a good dad to your kiddo.. and not only that, where was all this concern for your little one when all this crap started? C'mon. Sorry, but for real what you did wasn't right, and it seems what you continue to do isn't okay either. SSSS, jeez girl, I'm so sorry you've had to go through all of this.
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