KatZee Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 So here I am. Virtually one year since the split with my ex boyfriend. I honestly don't know where the time has gone and I don't know how a year has gone by so fast. I've been over him for a while. I'm enjoying single life, I've met so many new people, I've done so many new things. I pride myself in being a strong person, a much happier person, a more confident and secure person since the split with my ex. I know that I wanted to be out of the relationship before he officially ended it with me. It's why it was so easy for me to walk out of his house and never look back. Unfortunately, I just caught a picture on FB. (Of course. FB. ) Anyway, it's not a new picture, it's from years ago, even before we started dating. Either way, it just reminded me of how he looked when we were dating. And the picture is with him and (pardon my French) the stupid f.ucking c.unt who did nothing but talk crap about me, about us when we were dating, who made my life miserable, made bets as to when he'd dump me, give me dirty looks... This is the girl who my ex called a c.unt. He knows she's a nasty B and there she is. Putting up pictures of him and her together. (She's actually engaged by the way so it's not like they're dating.) The picture just had my heart racing though. It's calmed down as I'm writing this and I'm back to normal... but UGH I felt like my heart was about to jump out of my chest for a second there. I thought I was over him? Is this normal? 2
Chi townD Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 I think that it was probably the shock of it at the moment. You probably didn't expect it and it caused you to trigger. It triggered all the negative feelings that you had because nothing positive was in your post. I think that once the shock of it wears off and you start thinking with your brian rather than with your emotions, you'll see that your life is so much better and that you don't need that kind of drama in your life and that you're such a happier person as a result. You'll be fine. You just triggered, that's all. 3
cavalier99 Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 No you are DEFINITLY not normal! Kidding. Glad you are doing well. You have been since ive seen your posts when i joined 6 months ago. You helped me a lot. Thanks. Cav 1
thefooloftheyear Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 Ill say it again... You people are letting FB kill your life...Just dont do it!!! TFOY
Author KatZee Posted April 9, 2013 Author Posted April 9, 2013 Ill say it again... You people are letting FB kill your life...Just dont do it!!! TFOY Nah I had deleted everyone/everything blocked etc. I just happened to stumble across her crap on someone else's wall (birthday wish). I guess it's true though. I definitely re-triggered the anger. There's so much anger right now. I hate that girl and if I could fight her I would pound her face in. 1
Mack05 Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 I definitely re-triggered the anger. There's so much anger right now. I hate that girl and if I could fight her I would pound her face in. You give great advice Katzee. Let me just get that out if the way. Maybe you agree or disagree with this, but let the anger towards her go. She is not worth it and I know you are better then that. Raise above her.. 1
Author KatZee Posted April 9, 2013 Author Posted April 9, 2013 You give great advice Katzee. Let me just get that out if the way. Maybe you agree or disagree with this, but let the anger towards her go. She is not worth it and I know you are better then that. Raise above her.. I really wish I could be bigger and better than that to just not feel anger. But I know for a fact she is the reason my ex pulled the final trigger with me. I know for a fact she's one of the reasons why he said some of the things he said to me. She's a toxic and narcissistic person, and I doubt you've ever met someone so nasty in your life. To know that her hand was so heavily involved in my relationship with my ex from DAY ONE and that she thinks she has so much influence. It blows my mind and just makes me so angry.
Mack05 Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 I really wish I could be bigger and better than that to just not feel anger. But I know for a fact she is the reason my ex pulled the final trigger with me. I know for a fact she's one of the reasons why he said some of the things he said to me. She's a toxic and narcissistic person, and I doubt you've ever met someone so nasty in your life. To know that her hand was so heavily involved in my relationship with my ex from DAY ONE and that she thinks she has so much influence. It blows my mind and just makes me so angry. I have no doubt your description of this woman is spot on. But if this guy was the guy for you, he would have cut this toxicity from his life without a seconds thought. Sometimes we get done a favour and we don't even realise it at the time. Could you imagine if you married this guy, only to find out he had a yellow streak the size of Nebraska? As beyonce said "you turned out to be the best thing I never had". That's how you should view this guy. He is a coward, she is a b!tch and you deserve better. Let them head towards what they are heading towards. You go got a guy that deserves Katzee. Letting go of anger IMO has a positive effect on your life going forward. Some agree with that, some don't. I think I'm right on this one 1
youngnlove89 Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 You know what is funny? I stumbled across an ex of mine from a few years back recently on FB. The one who cheated on me with a married woman twice his age and ended up marrying her in the end! (and now has a baby on the way) Anyways, my heart dropped too, but not because I missed him but because it made me remember that pain I went through and what a horrible time it was. It was the worst breakup of all for me. Gosh. Don't worry, what you experienced is normal, especially if it is a painful memory. Another ex of mine that I looked up on FB, my heart didn't drop. I just smiled. Why? Because I'm happy for him, and I remember all the good memories we had. He was a good person. He respected me and things ended well, even though it broke my heart back then. But now I'm indifferent and I respect him and think highly of him. That's the difference. One relationship was bad, one was good. 1
Author KatZee Posted April 9, 2013 Author Posted April 9, 2013 I have no doubt your description of this woman is spot on. But if this guy was the guy for you, he would have cut this toxicity from his life without a seconds thought. Sometimes we get done a favour and we don't even realise it at the time. Could you imagine if you married this guy, only to find out he had a yellow streak the size of Nebraska? As beyonce said "you turned out to be the best thing I never had". That's how you should view this guy. He is a coward, she is a b!tch and you deserve better. Let them head towards what they are heading towards. You go got a guy that deserves Katzee. Letting go of anger IMO has a positive effect on your life going forward. Some agree with that, some don't. I think I'm right on this one You know the thing was, that I had gotten past the anger. I came out of the anger stage 7-8 months ago. And I've felt nothing for him or anyone in his life in months. I know why it just triggered so horribly though. Both of them are horrible people and both of them made my life hell and there they are together. Best of buddies!
Author KatZee Posted April 9, 2013 Author Posted April 9, 2013 You know what is funny? I stumbled across an ex of mine from a few years back recently on FB. The one who cheated on me with a married woman twice his age and ended up marrying her in the end! (and now has a baby on the way) Anyways, my heart dropped too, but not because I missed him but because it made me remember that pain I went through and what a horrible time it was. It was the worst breakup of all for me. Gosh. Don't worry, what you experienced is normal, especially if it is a painful memory. Another ex of mine that I looked up on FB, my heart didn't drop. I just smiled. Why? Because I'm happy for him, and I remember all the good memories we had. He was a good person. He respected me and things ended well, even though it broke my heart back then. But now I'm indifferent and I respect him and think highly of him. That's the difference. One relationship was bad, one was good. Yeah I have the same ex. A guy from 11 years ago that I still talk to on occasion. We're still friends to this day and I have no hard feelings. I actually stalk his FB b/c he's had a girlfriend now for a little while and I like to go see their disgusting cute pictures.
geegirl Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 I met my ex at work. When we started dating, coincidentally, someone scratched his car and mine. Both had a derogatory word on it. I was baffled. When we broke up, someone created a fake FB profile of me, with a picture of the ex and I together. And then I got an email from this woman, who worked with us at the time telling me how great it was that I got dumped and that he was with me only for a f*** and that she got the best of him. She said she was with him when he was dating me. The thing is, he used to say some odd things about her when we worked/dated. And a couple of times I saw her talking to him but never put it together. And a few times he would tell me that she was stalking him and that he could not stand being around her. It's normal to feel what you are feeling. It just resurrected those bad feelings, but it will be fleeting. I don't think it is an indication of you stagnating or not being over him but more so little jolt to the brain, a reminder of what once pained you. 1
Author KatZee Posted April 9, 2013 Author Posted April 9, 2013 I met my ex at work. When we started dating, coincidentally, someone scratched his car and mine. Both had a derogatory word on it. I was baffled. When we broke up, someone created a fake FB profile of me, with a picture of the ex and I together. And then I got an email from this woman, who worked with us at the time telling me how great it was that I got dumped and that he was with me only for a f*** and that she got the best of him. She said she was with him when he was dating me. The thing is, he used to say some odd things about her when we worked/dated. And a couple of times I saw her talking to him but never put it together. And a few times he would tell me that she was stalking him and that he could not stand being around her. It's normal to feel what you are feeling. It just resurrected those bad feelings, but it will be fleeting. I don't think it is an indication of you stagnating or not being over him but more so little jolt to the brain, a reminder of what once pained you. Ew! That's horrible! The girl I know is more sneaky with her behavior. She's an angel to your face and the second you turn your back she's a completely different person. I truly believe it's because she's insecure with her own self and she's just jealous of everyone else. She makes everyone feel like garbage and talks crap about everyone. Even her own "best friend." It's sad. It definitely was fleeting though b/c my heart's back to normal. I think I just needed to get the quick burst of anger out and now I'm OK. I just ran and did 10 quick push ups. That's how pumped I had been lmao.
geegirl Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 Ew! That's horrible! The girl I know is more sneaky with her behavior. She's an angel to your face and the second you turn your back she's a completely different person. I truly believe it's because she's insecure with her own self and she's just jealous of everyone else. She makes everyone feel like garbage and talks crap about everyone. Even her own "best friend." It's sad. It definitely was fleeting though b/c my heart's back to normal. I think I just needed to get the quick burst of anger out and now I'm OK. I just ran and did 10 quick push ups. That's how pumped I had been lmao. This one was sneaky too. She tried to be friends with me and always came by my desk to chat me up. The ex was sneaky too in the sense that he used to make her look like she was looney to get me off the scent. Rats! I'm glad it's gone! Good antidote!
Author KatZee Posted April 9, 2013 Author Posted April 9, 2013 This one was sneaky too. She tried to be friends with me and always came by my desk to chat me up. The ex was sneaky too in the sense that he used to make her look like she was looney to get me off the scent. Rats! I'm glad it's gone! Good antidote! Oh man! So he was cheating on you with her?! Grimey. Thank God my ex didn't cheat on me with this girl. He only cheated on me with his ex! HA HA! I would have lit myself on fire if he cheated on me with this ratchet b.itch.
geegirl Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 Oh man! So he was cheating on you with her?! Grimey. Thank God my ex didn't cheat on me with this girl. He only cheated on me with his ex! HA HA! I would have lit myself on fire if he cheated on me with this ratchet b.itch. Yep, he was cheating on me with her. When I confronted him after the break-up, he said, "I'm not sure when I stopped sleeping with her when I started dating you. There may have been some overlap." At the time I wanted to skin him and hang him out to dry for the birds. Now I just laugh about it. I still remember him stuttering!
Author KatZee Posted April 9, 2013 Author Posted April 9, 2013 Yep, he was cheating on me with her. When I confronted him after the break-up, he said, "I'm not sure when I stopped sleeping with her when I started dating you. There may have been some overlap." At the time I wanted to skin him and hang him out to dry for the birds. Now I just laugh about it. I still remember him stuttering! HAHAHAHA what an idiot. I can't believe people like this continue to infest the earth.
all_cats_rgray Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 Anger is heathy. Im told I don't have enough. let the hate flow through you. lol.
headsashed Posted April 10, 2013 Posted April 10, 2013 Wow 1 year, im a month behind you lol. Im the same as you tbh, I feel as though im 100% over my ex but I do get the odd heart racing moment when ive seen a pic of her or something,its normal I reckon. Ive also had a few dreams about her recently and ive felt nothing at all when Ive woke up but it did make me think at 1 point that I may not be 100% over her. Oh and hi geegirl
Author KatZee Posted April 10, 2013 Author Posted April 10, 2013 Anger is heathy. Im told I don't have enough. let the hate flow through you. lol. Go through my past threads. I was one wicked b.itch back in the day.
Author KatZee Posted April 10, 2013 Author Posted April 10, 2013 Wow 1 year, im a month behind you lol. Im the same as you tbh, I feel as though im 100% over my ex but I do get the odd heart racing moment when ive seen a pic of her or something,its normal I reckon. Ive also had a few dreams about her recently and ive felt nothing at all when Ive woke up but it did make me think at 1 point that I may not be 100% over her. Oh and hi geegirl Exactly. I'm like 100% over it but then something like this happens and I start to question if I am. I saw a picture of him and the girl he left me for and it didn't even phase me. I opened up an old wallet and I pulled out a photo of us and his business card, and I didn't even blink twice. I too have been having dreams recently and they're kind of weird and I wake up feeling absolutely nothing. Then THIS happens and my heart decides to try to jump out of my chest. I don't get it. lol.
destroyed4sho Posted April 10, 2013 Posted April 10, 2013 Nah I had deleted everyone/everything blocked etc. I just happened to stumble across her crap on someone else's wall (birthday wish). I guess it's true though. I definitely re-triggered the anger. There's so much anger right now. I hate that girl and if I could fight her I would pound her face in. If you need back up, please let me know, I am by you. I have been dying to pound someone's face in for a while..... 1
Author KatZee Posted April 10, 2013 Author Posted April 10, 2013 If you need back up, please let me know, I am by you. I have been dying to pound someone's face in for a while..... Lmao. She thankfully moved out of this state months ago. I did notice a considerable lift in city smog around the same time. Coincidence?
Sugarkane Posted April 10, 2013 Posted April 10, 2013 I don't get it. Why would a guy willingly date his stalker? Sounds extremely odd. Usually stalkers freak people out, not make them jump into a stalkers arms. I don't get why date someone who you claim to hate? What sane person would? I met my ex at work. When we started dating, coincidentally, someone scratched his car and mine. Both had a derogatory word on it. I was baffled. When we broke up, someone created a fake FB profile of me, with a picture of the ex and I together. And then I got an email from this woman, who worked with us at the time telling me how great it was that I got dumped and that he was with me only for a f*** and that she got the best of him. She said she was with him when he was dating me. The thing is, he used to say some odd things about her when we worked/dated. And a couple of times I saw her talking to him but never put it together. And a few times he would tell me that she was stalking him and that he could not stand being around her. It's normal to feel what you are feeling. It just resurrected those bad feelings, but it will be fleeting. I don't think it is an indication of you stagnating or not being over him but more so little jolt to the brain, a reminder of what once pained you.
LostOne1 Posted April 10, 2013 Posted April 10, 2013 Good to see you passing a year. I'm getting close myself to a year now. Only difference is I might have found someone better now almost at the 1 yr point. But yeah time sure flies and I decided no matter what I WILL NOT look at her FB at all. I know it will just make me feel bad in some form if she is doing better off. What I don't know can't kill me.. I'm happy in my own world and own life now
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