StanMusial Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 Your wasting your breath trying to reason with a narrow minded fool. I bet he's a Republican. I think Reaver is a girl. No idea about her political affiliations.
JuneJulySeptember Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 Omg! A woman who rates herself as less than a 7? Big plus! I think that everything should work out OK for you in your 20s. I was in a similar situation to you, but then again I'm a guy. The 20s are usually a windfall for most relatively social women as you meet a lot of people and men are generally less picky. Just keep with it. If you are in the same situation at age 27 or so, then ask again. As far as never getting hit on, you have gotten hit on. You have a few instances and there will be more as you move towards your mid 20s. I have REALLY never been hit on, so there you go.
ChessPieceFace Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 Can't imagine sitting around and wishing and hoping for the right person to approach me. If you're a 5 then you're not going to get nearly as many guys asking you as you want/need. You'll have to take more initiative. Just accept it and do it. Doesn't mean you have to ask for a date, just be friendly and talk to them and show obvious interest.
Author Catteis Posted April 21, 2013 Author Posted April 21, 2013 The OP has not said that she even wants these guys. Stop projecting. If she has said that she only desires male models, then I would agree with you. No, the world you choose to observe and interact with is. If you read the whole thread you would see I did inquire about what type of guy she goes for. She made conflicting and contradictory statements in her post. I didn't assume anything nor did I extrapolate. If she wants advice she needs to explain her situation better. I don't really place an importance on looks. I'm not saying I don't care about looks, but other facts weigh more than how perfect a man's face or body is. I want a guy who's funny. Funny guys make me really comfortable. They bring out the charming side of my personality and I'm not usually withdrawn around them. I want a man who's patient and understanding. I have lots of issues and I'm one of those people that become extremely aggressive when they're sad or stressed. I tend to also push people away when I'm upset, and if a guy is gonna run away or fight back with me, we'll end quickly. I need someone that's going to understand that I'm going through something and my mood will go back to normal eventually. I want a man who's protective, has a degree and works with it, family oriented, I mean, I could go on and on. Can't imagine sitting around and wishing and hoping for the right person to approach me. If you're a 5 then you're not going to get nearly as many guys asking you as you want/need. You'll have to take more initiative. Just accept it and do it. Doesn't mean you have to ask for a date, just be friendly and talk to them and show obvious interest. That's true. Probably the most useful post I've read so far. Not to say that the others weren't, but you're so right. That kind of just lit a light bulb in my brain. OP, I walk into a room full of women and of the women that are attractive to me I see green lights and red lights.* Green lights are the women that I notice.....noticing me. The ones that check me out, perked up a bit, return my smile, any number of small things that I do pickup on. I talk to her and she responds in a manner that tries to keep the conversation going. These are the women I will approach and see if anything develops. Red lights are the women that looks through me, gives me no ques, complete cold fish, looks angry. I talk to her and get the hebigeebees or she brings up some other dude. These are the women I avoid. You are probably a red light to all guys. It probably isn't just your looks. Some women just aren't worth the effort because for whatever reason, they don't even try to meet you halfway or do anything to encourage you. Hell, had women that I find out later that were really into me and their friends are pissed at me because I drop trying to get her and she cries to her friend. Never mind she puts up roadblocks every step of the way in my effort to even ask her out. What the **** logic is there in that. Not worth my trouble. I agree, pics would be helpful. I don't think I'm extremely shy. I'm an introvert, but I can be very charming in situations. I can make people laugh and make them very comfortable, but if I'm not in a situation where I'm comfortable, I can be seen as moody and very withdrawn. That's just my personality in large groups. If a guy talks to me 1 on 1, I'm usually very friendly and I don't put up this wall like most girls do, because I don't feel like he's talking to me to get into my pants. I guess that's just how low my self-esteem is. I think guys can pick up on how insecure I am, and it turns them off I guess. I don't know. My god, everyone keeps asking for pics. I'm nothing special. Here:
StanMusial Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I don't really place an importance on looks. I'm not saying I don't care about looks, but other facts weigh more than how perfect a man's face or body is. I want a guy who's funny. Funny guys make me really comfortable. They bring out the charming side of my personality and I'm not usually withdrawn around them. I don't think I'm extremely shy. I'm an introvert, but I can be very charming in situations. I can make people laugh and make them very comfortable, but if I'm not in a situation where I'm comfortable, I can be seen as moody and very withdrawn. That's just my personality in large groups. If a guy talks to me 1 on 1, I'm usually very friendly and I don't put up this wall like most girls do, because I don't feel like he's talking to me to get into my pants. I guess that's just how low my self-esteem is. I think guys can pick up on how insecure I am, and it turns them off I guess. I don't know. I get the impression you are fairly self-aware and that's a good thing. The first thing you mentioned was "funny guys", so let's consider this. Do you think maybe being moody and withdrawn is somewhat off-putting to someone who is more outgoing and fun? Maybe try to be in more situations where you are comfortable and can let your personality shine through more. That might mean hanging out with a different crowd or at a different place or smaller group settings, that's up to you to determine.
runningfar Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Your looks aren't preventing anything. If you were to do online dating I would use different ones... One doing things and big one, smiling-- they look dramatic and trying too hard... But, on the chance this whole thing wasnt a ploy for compliments but sincere, you are very pretty.
Lillygoose Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I agree with what the guy said above. Too many girls constantly put them selves down. You are so pretty xx
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Just do OLD. There's no reason why any woman should have trouble meeting guys from there. You're better looking than most of the women on this site and they have no shortage of dates. 1
Author Catteis Posted April 21, 2013 Author Posted April 21, 2013 I get the impression you are fairly self-aware and that's a good thing. The first thing you mentioned was "funny guys", so let's consider this. Do you think maybe being moody and withdrawn is somewhat off-putting to someone who is more outgoing and fun? Maybe try to be in more situations where you are comfortable and can let your personality shine through more. That might mean hanging out with a different crowd or at a different place or smaller group settings, that's up to you to determine. I'd like to think that I am self-aware. Yes, I could see how my personality can sometimes push people away. I understand that people gravitate towards positivity, so whenever I'm in that "mode" I tend to go home or excuse myself. I don't want people to think I'm this bitchy girl that's not interested in anyone or anything. The issue with me is that I'm very defensive and I have trouble warming up to new people and I become tense with new faces. It's something I'm working on as I get older. I feel like I'm still in my awkward phase where I'm trying to find myself. I thought I'd be more comfortable in my skin at 22. Guess not Your looks aren't preventing anything. If you were to do online dating I would use different ones... One doing things and big one, smiling-- they look dramatic and trying too hard... But, on the chance this whole thing wasnt a ploy for compliments but sincere, you are very pretty. Thank you for your honesty. Those are just bathroom pics. I wanted to show pictures where I thought I looked very nice, but you're right. I should smile more. I never smile. I'm insecure about my whole mouth area.
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I'd like to think that I am self-aware. Yes, I could see how my personality can sometimes push people away. I understand that people gravitate towards positivity, so whenever I'm in that "mode" I tend to go home or excuse myself. I don't want people to think I'm this bitchy girl that's not interested in anyone or anything. The issue with me is that I'm very defensive and I have trouble warming up to new people and I become tense with new faces. It's something I'm working on as I get older. I feel like I'm still in my awkward phase where I'm trying to find myself. I thought I'd be more comfortable in my skin at 22. Guess not Thank you for your honesty. Those are just bathroom pics. I wanted to show pictures where I thought I looked very nice, but you're right. I should smile more. I never smile. I'm insecure about my whole mouth area. I think you meant to say 32. Most people in their 20s are not comfortable in their own skin and are still figuring themselves and life out. They're just very good at hiding this. 1
Author Catteis Posted April 21, 2013 Author Posted April 21, 2013 Just do OLD. There's no reason why any woman should have trouble meeting guys from there. You're better looking than most of the women on this site and they have no shortage of dates. I actually like older guys! 35+. I'm always crushing on my professors at school. I don't know, I feel like older guys want that bubbly cute blonde. I've approached this guy at my clinicals one time, he was about 42, divorced, and I thought he was so sexy. Something about his personality made me melt. He was so secure with himself and I felt like he had a lot to offer. Anyway, I asked him if he wanted to go eat lunch with me and he says he isn't hungry. I just gave up at that point and I was so mortified that I avoided him the rest of my time there. I always saw him flirting with the nurses and kissing their hands. I'm just like "Why won't he give me that attention?"
Author Catteis Posted April 21, 2013 Author Posted April 21, 2013 Does anyone think I'm not having luck because I live in a predominately white area? I'm so scared to entertain this thought, because I feel racist. But, I'm a black girl in the deep south. I don't come across many black people, and the 2 guys that were black, I had a fling with (as noted in my first post). Does anyone think it might be a race thing? :-/
Sunshine87 Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Awwww you have a really cute face. All you need to do is smile a bit more Your face is definitely not the problem!
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