mikejh0730 Posted September 15, 2004 Posted September 15, 2004 Ok, here is the story. I met this girl a while ago through some friends, never really talked to her. I saw her at this restaurant I work at one time. She asked if I was going out that night and I said yes. She asked for my number so she could get a hold of me later. She called later that night and asked me to come down to a bar where her and some friends were at. I went to the bar to see her. When I got there we went to the bar together and talked for about 20. I left the bar a little while later after talking for a while. Nothing happened. I called her last night to see what she was up to. She has a 3 year old and I could here the kid yelling in the background. She said she has her hands full. We talked a little bit and she told me to call her sometime, or she will call me. What do I do. This was yesterday. I don't want to wait too long to call her back. Do I ask her to do something that would involve taking the kid along too? I was in a long relationship and trying to get back on track in the women situation.
Barby Posted September 15, 2004 Posted September 15, 2004 Depending on what you're seeking with this woman depends on what you should ask her to do. If you think she is someone you may want to pursue a relationship with, once you get to know her better then yes you should do something and have her bring the child along. If you just want to get to know her now (not sure what you're seeking) then maybe you should suggest going out to dinner (the two of you) so you can be alone and get a chance to get to know her without the distractions....then once you do that you'll know if it feels right to do something involving her child. And if you only are looking to casually date and maybe have a good time with her then inviting her to the bar to "hang out" will give you a chance to know her and see her again in a relaxed very casual setting..no preasure...no expectations...
Author mikejh0730 Posted September 15, 2004 Author Posted September 15, 2004 I know I want to pursue something with her. Having a kid kind of scares me, but it is something I can overlook. She is great. I think she is into me, but I'm not completely sure. I guess the only way I can find out is by asking her to dinner. When she said call me sometime I didn't know how to take it. What does it mean?
savethedrama4allama Posted September 15, 2004 Posted September 15, 2004 When she said call me sometime...she meant call me sometime. I think if you like her, you can call her today. Don't worry about appearing desperate or clingy, its just a phone call. It'll show that you're interested. At least to me anyway...I don't like the "wait X days before you call" game. Its crap to me. You like me? Call me. Even every day. You start driving by my house and peeking in the windows...okay, we have a problem. But a phone call is all good. To involve the kid or not...I would ask the woman and let her make the decision. There are pros and cons to each. It may be difficult to find/afford a babysitter, but at the same time kids shouldn't be exposed to any random man their mother is dating. Only she will know what is best for her child.
Barby Posted September 15, 2004 Posted September 15, 2004 Originally posted by mikejh0730 I know I want to pursue something with her. Having a kid kind of scares me, but it is something I can overlook. She is great. I think she is into me, but I'm not completely sure. I guess the only way I can find out is by asking her to dinner. When she said call me sometime I didn't know how to take it. What does it mean? I agree that she wanted you to call her "sometime" but don't make it too long before you call. She got your number because clearly she was interested so give her a call and the dinner thing sounds like a good idea. Call her soon (in the next day or so) and ask her out. I can imagine that her having a child could be a little wierd for you, at least you're not a jerk and not holding it against her. Since you know you'd like to pursue things with her (once you get to know her I'm assuming so you don't rush things) take her on a date with you two alone, then maybe do the "day date" thing and go with her to a park or somewhere where you can get a feel for how things are with the 3 of you together......Just don't exclude her and don't hold it against her if she can't go out clubbing a lot, since she is a mommy....(Not that YOU will just touching on that subject real quick). And I agree that she will know what's best and when is better to involve the child so when YOU are ready (make sure you're ready) then discuss it with her and go from there. You sound like you like her so I think you two will do okay...my main advice is be honest with her no matter what....(wish all people would follow this advice)
alicia24 Posted September 15, 2004 Posted September 15, 2004 dont get invloved with people that have kids. the psycho ex ruins everything. no matter how the person is get away while you can. unless the kids dad fell off the planet.....run
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