Is there hope for me?

[brave4me]

It has been six months now since my husband and I separated. To make a long story short, my husband had another "love interest" which I would be willing to bet my life on, caused our downfall. Yes, there was someone else, and still is. I made every possible mistake there was, in trying to reconcile. I'm just now starting to get my feet back on solid ground, and actually feel like I'm over the worst of it.

 

So, here is what is happening now. I am a christian, and have found it so hard in the past to keep my mouth shut about my feelings, my hurt, etc., and basically just kept pushing him away. I've finally started healing, and feel like I'm actually starting to regain control of my life, my emotions and my well being. We very rarely ever talk, but lately we have had several conversations, regarding an album I have told him I finished and wanted to bring over to his home. He helps me out financially a bit, so we do talk briefly about how and where we can exchange $.

 

The difference at this point is whenever I see him or talk to him, I have been as pleasant as can be, and treat him as if he were any one of my friends. He said I could stop by and bring over the scrap book I put together, and initially, he said he could squeeze me in for abount 10 min or so after work, but today, he said he wanted me to come over after he would be home, with nothing else planned for the evening.

 

This sounds stupid, but do you think he is either comfortable, and feeling as though he no longer has to feel guilty about his "girlfriend" or is it possible that he has feelings, or wants to spend time with me? Mind you, in the past, he has avoided me, and has been the king of defense, denial, and the ultimate finger pointer, even though he broke his vow. It's amazing to be able to talk to him as a friend, and just plain talk to him, yet I'm beside myself that he has made time for me to stop over, and wants to look through the scrap book I made for him with me. I'm not getting my hopes up, plus, I'm moving on, so it's not like I'm setting myself up for a fall, but on the other hand, I don't want to screw up, or do or say anything stupid.

 

I've have been praying for a miracle for the longest time, and have accepted that God has different plans for my life, but is there some advice anyone could offer about this? Any advice, thoughts, or wisdowm? Is is possible this pending divorce could turn around? I know he is still involved, but on the other hand we are still technically married? I know that God has my answers, and that I should keep my faith with HIM, but I would love to hear some of your thoughts, and hopefully before tomorrow evening (Wed. 9-15).

 

Thanks for your time all of you, and look forward to replies.

 

God Bless

[Mr Bungle]

Have you thought about seeing somebody else? As distasteful as that may seem, sometimes it really sparks a jealousy rage in your partner, like "oh...wait....I may really lose her."

 

I am on the verge of divorce myself (and I am working to stop it from happening), and I just bought an e-book called "Stop Your Divorce", which may or may not help your situation, but it might be worth trying. I am a Christian, too, but believe me, praying doesn't help. I know this. If you pretend not to care about him any more, and act as though you're getting on with your life without him, he may find his current situation no longer satisfying. And if you think he's seeing someone else, chances are that he is. I don't want to upset you, but that probably is the case.

[Butchey]

There is always hope.

Be careful he may want to have power over you.

You have come so far but he is still the cheater.

If you go just have a pleasant time but don't compromise yourself.

Go slow.

If a miracle happens it will happen. But you need time to heal the wounds.

Good luck. I hope it works out for you. Keep us posted.