Emilia Posted April 8, 2013 Posted April 8, 2013 hmmm maybe just pub it then... thanks for your time - you have been very helpful and easy to talk to. I`ll be back online later today. Not at all. Keep us updated. Good luck!
Author jusjus Posted April 8, 2013 Author Posted April 8, 2013 if you read the post below (from your very first post in this thread) and a friend of yours was talking about this girl instead of you, what you would say to your friend? Especially about the bolded part? Hi again, do you think it would be prudent to ask why she doesnt want to commit or just take it at face value - seeing it could be like getting blood out of a stone??
Emilia Posted April 8, 2013 Posted April 8, 2013 Hi again, do you think it would be prudent to ask why she doesnt want to commit or just take it at face value - seeing it could be like getting blood out of a stone?? It really depends on what you feel comfortable with. If a man didn't want to commit to me, I'd assume he wasn't into me enough or had something else going on or whatever, I probably wouldn't want to hear it. I'm not really sure how many people tell you the truth anyway. If you are thinking you would change your ways for her if she asked you to, DON'T!
Author jusjus Posted April 8, 2013 Author Posted April 8, 2013 Hi again, do you think it would be prudent to ask why she doesnt want to commit or just take it at face value - seeing it could be like getting blood out of a stone?? I meant "tied down" - sorry
Author jusjus Posted April 8, 2013 Author Posted April 8, 2013 It really depends on what you feel comfortable with. If a man didn't want to commit to me, I'd assume he wasn't into me enough or had something else going on or whatever, I probably wouldn't want to hear it. I'm not really sure how many people tell you the truth anyway. If you are thinking you would change your ways for her if she asked you to, DON'T! well she says we can do everything a couple would normally do BUT we wouldnt be a "couple" What does that mean???
Author jusjus Posted April 8, 2013 Author Posted April 8, 2013 Can you imagine what it's going to be like with her in terms of communication? I can and it will likely be a long road of frustration. I don't know how old you or she is, but such behavior cannot be tolerated. Perhaps telling her that you'd like to have a mature conversation about this and see where it goes from there. Maybe she was very nervous about being confronted with such a question and so reacted in that manner. But, with all that said, she did not commit. So, at least for now, she is unwilling. So you know that you are both on different pages, levels of the relationship. well she says we can do everything a couple would normally do BUT we wouldnt be a "couple" What does that mean???
Emilia Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 well she says we can do everything a couple would normally do BUT we wouldnt be a "couple" What does that mean??? that she wants to have sex with other people
Author jusjus Posted April 9, 2013 Author Posted April 9, 2013 that she wants to have sex with other people well first of all, she has said she doesnt want to see anyone else and I believe her because she works very long hours and the two days off she has are spent with me til like gone midnight so another guy or guys would be very hard to fit in plus I dont think she is a liar either. She also has issues with intimacy - holding hands, kissing, hugging and I would ask how to make her feel comfortable enough to regularly do that??
Emilia Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 She also has issues with intimacy - holding hands, kissing, hugging and I would ask how to make her feel comfortable enough to regularly do that?? ok. you need to decide what you want. Clearly she is very good looking which is why you are battling with this. The only thing I can tell you is that I personally (since you asked my opinion) would not date someone who has intimacy issues and isn't prepared to make a commitment. I think it's a receipe for a heartache but it is your life
Author jusjus Posted April 9, 2013 Author Posted April 9, 2013 ok. you need to decide what you want. Clearly she is very good looking which is why you are battling with this. The only thing I can tell you is that I personally (since you asked my opinion) would not date someone who has intimacy issues and isn't prepared to make a commitment. I think it's a receipe for a heartache but it is your life I know i do. however, maybe the one i`m dating can be helped (not changed) - just in the same way you helped me...
Emilia Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 I know i do. however, maybe the one i`m dating can be helped (not changed) - just in the same way you helped me... It's not your job to help people, especially not those that put a blanket over their head when you ask an honest question and send you a text that they don't want commitment. Don't get caught up in codependent relationships where you are used and neglected. I'm helping you because it's of no emotional consequence to me
veggirl Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 I'm not sure why'd you want to continue investing in this. Emilia is right, she sounds emotionally retarded. Putting a blanket over her face and refusing to talk about THIS? What is she gonna do if you actually get in a relationship with her and a REAL issue arises? Run out of the house? If for some reason you want to continue seeing her, I'd tell her you are going to be dating others as well because you are looking for real commitment and emotional maturity.
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