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Posted

I have been dumped before. About 5.5 years ago, I was 24 at the time. I can honestly say that when we split, I knew we were done. I didn't want him back, we just weren't suited.

 

So... There is a group of people on here that do want their Exes back, what's to say they are "not" the one. Most when they do reconcile, they don't post about it...

 

Also, how many of us has been with someone that HAS gotten back with their ex??

 

I have hope. I'm still in love with him. And I see him almost every day, as we work together managing a restaurant. Time will tell. I'm not sure if I have read anything even close to my story... Every situation is different, and even harder, every person is different. It's hard to compare...

 

I have never met anyone like my ex. So unique, goofy, sensitive, VERY loving once he lets you in. Loves to cuddle and be cozy, but also strong. He is the love of my life. And I will be patient.

 

Thoughts......

Posted

Sorry to burst your bubble, but just because you feel that way about him doesn't mean he feels that way about you. He could be thinking that he knows he doesn't want you back and you just aren't suited. Having hope doesn't make something possible or realistic.

 

You're right about one thing though..every situation is different. I happen to be in the process of a possible reconciliation but I'm being completely realistic about it. I don't think that just because I want it to work out, it will automatically work out. I have no idea what's going to happen in the future. It would be wonderful if things worked out with my ex, but if they don't, I will be ok. I will find someone else.

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Posted

I held on to the hope for a while. For me, it's gone now. I do WANT him back, but I know that he's never coming back.

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Posted

I'm being realistic, he may not ever want me back. But sometimes break ups happen, and both know it is for the best. I've never wanted an ex back. Even when I've been dumped. It hurt, but it was OVER, for both of us.

 

Maybe that is how my current ex feels. Time will tell.

Posted

Oh Noma. How like me you sound. I held on to hope for a while after my ex and I broke up. Keep in mind that as you hold onto that hope you are essentially accumulating "damage points" for yourself should your hope fail. And that will make it hit much harder.

 

But i do hope it all works out. Its wonderful that you are so loving and patient with your ex. I was holding on to hope to a while after my break up. It didnt go as planned. I still love her, she is an amazing girl, but i am aware that the next time i see her she may be with someone. So keep that hope in check! its easy to get lofty ideas about how you and your ex will reconcile because of the better person you have become since the breakup. Zayum! Its so risky being patient.

 

If you dont mind, tell me what you mean when you say you will be patient?

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Posted

We broke up about 6 weeks ago. I started a thread about it. He is getting off medications. We are both growing. We still work together, and he flirts. I need to back off some and see if he comes to me.

Posted

@ Noma

 

Could you clarify, when you were dumped 5.5 years ago that was by a different guy than the one that you've separated from 6 weeks ago?

 

Sorry, read it twice and still don't get it :)

Posted

About people coming back, i have a few examples:

 

1) my ex came back after 4-5 years wanting to rekindle

2) same happened to my mum

3) my current ex, his ex dumped him in the cruellest way i.e. told him it was over, things had changed, up and left him with the rent to pay, had another bf lined up, begged my ex to take her to the train station after she had dumped him and said 'this is your last chance to kiss me' Hahaha oh dear. Anyway she has been with this guy for 2.5 years and after 1.5 years wrote a long letter to my ex asking to meet up.

4)My friend who im meeting up with in a bit, her story is different to any ive heard before; very cool until she met her current husband. She knew from the minute he held her hand he was the one. He didnt feel the same. After a couple of big breakups (lasting 6months) they finally stabilised and got married. She was 23 and he 31 when they met. She says, he came back when he realised he couldnt do better - make of that what u will. They have a kid, i work with her hubby and although he had a roving eye before i think marriage and kids have made him grow up. He respects her in his way (there were examples of callousness in the past). People mellow.

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Posted
@ Noma

 

Could you clarify, when you were dumped 5.5 years ago that was by a different guy than the one that you've separated from 6 weeks ago?

 

Sorry, read it twice and still don't get it :)

 

 

Yes different guy.

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