lovenote24 Posted April 7, 2013 Posted April 7, 2013 I met this guy and we instantly had a connection. He defined my type without me even realizing it. He took initiative and took me on dates, not just out to dinner but planned whole outings. I knew from the get-go that he worked a lot, like 12+ hours every day. I was impressed by his work ethic, hard to find that in a 23 year old. He knows what he wants and is working his cute little butt off to get it. He is very respectful when we are together and never uses his phone on a date but will answer a call from work or have to run over to the studio (he's a music producer) to grab some equipment for his boss etc even when I am with him. This didn't bother me too much because I know work is important to him. Especially in the early stages of dating, I believe I should be respected but don't have to be top priority. (He would sometimes take me to the studio and let me help him on projects late at night when he couldn't get out to take me to dinner which was fun and cool that he let me be a part of what means the most to him.) I am very big on the fact that people should be there own person. I don't want someone to drop everything for me. He used to text me at least every day to see how I was doing and to plan our next date night but it's been a week since we last talked. After about a month or two of dating he stopped making dates. I hadn't heard from him in a couple days so I texted him and that back and forth went on for a bit but it was always me initiating it. He apologized for not being around and that he got really busy at work. I don't want to seem all clingy and annoying so I stopped and now he hasn't contacted me at all in about a week. I believe him in that his work got busy and it isn't just some excuse to push me off and I am proud of him for going after his dreams but I don't want to just be forgotten. We were really great together.
Buttercup84 Posted April 7, 2013 Posted April 7, 2013 Sweetie, do not mean to be harsh but he is pulling away. No one is ever so busy ! It takes a minute to text someone or call them. I work a full time job, study full time, go to the gym 6 days a week and I would make time for a man that I liked. He has breaks, he has lunch so he CAN call you. Do not be anyones option or something. Do not contact him, and if he contacts you, tell him he missed his chance. 3
MissIndependant Posted April 7, 2013 Posted April 7, 2013 Sweetie, do not mean to be harsh but he is pulling away. No one is ever so busy ! It takes a minute to text someone or call them. I work a full time job, study full time, go to the gym 6 days a week and I would make time for a man that I liked. He has breaks, he has lunch so he CAN call you. Do not be anyones option or something. Do not contact him, and if he contacts you, tell him he missed his chance. I'm sorry but I tend to agree. If he's busy the communication might be less and it might take longer to reply to texts etc but it should still be there. I work 10hrs, 5 days a week, go to the gym in the evenings, jog in the mornings and study via correspondance on top of that. By anyone's standards my life is very busy, just like Buttercup84s. On the flip side the guy I'm seeing works full time, trains several hours a day and competes in motor sports on a semi professional level. That said we have very busy and often conflicting schedules. But make no mistake, we talk everyday, whether it's a 5 minute phone call or a half hour visit or just a quick back and forth of texts. Why? Because we care about each other and we want to know how they are doing. And to simply let them know that we were thinking of them. What it boils down to is, when you care about someone you want to contact them. Because you are thinking about them, you want to be closer to them, you want to share things with them and see how their day is going. And you want them to know you care. He doesn't seem bothered by not having contact with you for a week and counting and you are doing your head in about it. What does that tell you? 1
MoreThanThat Posted April 7, 2013 Posted April 7, 2013 I agree with the other posters. In almost 30 years of dating/relationships, I've never gone a DAY without hearing from a guy who was into me. 1
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted April 8, 2013 Posted April 8, 2013 I'm in that exact position right now and honestly it isn't worth it. I hate that he doesn't make time, I respect that he works but no one is THAT busy. If a guy wants to see you he can make time and that is exactly what I told my guy last night.
Divasu Posted April 8, 2013 Posted April 8, 2013 If you've been dating for two months, have you ever taken it upon yourself to ask him out/make plans? Some guys don't mind being the planners/making the dates in the beginning, but who knows.
Giraffe1 Posted April 8, 2013 Posted April 8, 2013 (edited) This kind of behavior happens all the time from men and women alike. Let me cut to the point, we make time for people we value and care about, plain and simple. He isn't making the time and do you want to be that person waiting for him to call/text you? That doesn't sound appealing to me waiting around for someone who might text me 5 days from now. So that's the question you have to ask yourself do you want to keep waiting and stressing over this or do you want to end it? It's your decision but please remember there are other men out there that would LOVE to shower you with attention and affection and wouldn't ignore you like this. Edited April 8, 2013 by Giraffe1 1
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