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How much does race/culture matter to you in dating?

CryForNoOne

By CryForNoOne
in General Relationship Discussion

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MrCastle Established Member

MrCastle

Posted
Posted
Well, you are entitled to your preferences. Personally, I'd never date a guy with your attitude. Sounds like you have inferiority complex, no offense.

 

People that don't date their own does raise some flags. How can you not be attracted to your own ethnic background? Hard to believe but it does happen.

 

Crosses all ethnicites, crosses both genders.

joystickd Established Member

joystickd

Posted
Posted
Well, you are entitled to your preferences. Personally, I'd never date a guy with your attitude. Sounds like you have inferiority complex, no offense.

No inferiority complex. I just stick with what favorably responds to me. I spent high school and college sticking with my own race with no success. I had to deal with horrible embarrassing rejection. When I found success it was with races other than black. I just date what wants to date me. What's the problem with that?

RachR Established Member

RachR

Posted
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Not at all. To me, attractive is attractive is attractive, they came in all races...

  • Like 4
MrNate 2.0 Established Member

MrNate 2.0

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It all comes down to what's on the inside for me.

 

I never single a race out. They all have their own bad apples, but plenty of knockouts as well.

  • Like 2
MrNate 2.0 Established Member

MrNate 2.0

Posted
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Not at all. To me, attractive is attractive is attractive, they came in all races...

 

Correct.

 

Let's go beyond physical attraction here: Can she make me happy?

 

That's big for me.

  • Like 1
Djz05 Established Member

Djz05

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Correct.

 

Let's go beyond physical attraction here: Can she make me happy?

 

That's big for me.

 

Mama-san can help find someone to make you happy :D

  • Like 1
  • 5 weeks later...
Seductive Established Member

Seductive

Posted
Posted (edited)

There are going to be vague generalizations here, but this is just my experience.

 

Up until age 27, I only dated Indian men to please my parents. I wasn't allowed to date outside of my race, and I was told that non-Indian men wouldn't understand us. I was told that such relationships end up in divorce.

 

Due to some bad experiences with my Indian exes, I started dating white men and fell in love with one. Even though we broke up, I decided that I may be a better fit for white men. I liked how white men didn't expect me to be a virgin or judge me for being liberal.

 

Doing the whole OLD and trying to meet people elsewhere, I'm now wondering if I should go back to Indian men or even try dating East/South-East Asian men. My good white male friends are telling me that whites are scared of Indian women and prefer skinny blondes. Marriage seems to be a taboo issue to discuss with some white men. My white ex wanted to date for many years and thought marriage was over-rated. He also didn't want kids. With Indian men, they at least know that dating is supposed to lead to marriage and having kids.

 

We will see what the universe brings to me. :love:

Edited by Seductive
fortyninethousand322 Established Member

fortyninethousand322

Posted
Posted
Doing the whole OLD and trying to meet people elsewhere, I'm now wondering if I should go back to Indian men or even try dating East/South-East Asian men. My good white male friends are telling me that whites are scared of Indian women and prefer the blonde look. Marriage seems to be a taboo issue to discuss with some white men. With Indian men, they at least know that dating is supposed to lead to marriage. The white men I've met are okay with just dating for years and not having any future. There's an increasing trend of not wanting to have kids. Call me old-fashioned, but I still believe in marriage and kids.

 

We will see what the universe brings to me. :love:

 

Personally, I'm a white guy and I'm not usually attracted to white women. Asian, Indian, Middle Eastern, Black, Hispanic, all attractive, just not white women. And definitely not blondes.

 

I am not personally "scared" of Indian women. I do worry sometimes that if I try to date one she might not be "allowed" to date outside her race or religious heritage. Same goes for a lot of Muslim women (I had a bad experience with an Arab girl once). But, I went on a date with an Indian girl last night. She wasn't interested in seeing me further though.

Seductive Established Member

Seductive

Posted
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She stated that if she had children with an Indian, Chinese, Black person she would have children who didnt look like her.

 

Many half-Indian/half-white kids end up looking white, like Italian or Greek. Rhona Mitra or Lisa Ray are perfect examples. Indian parents tell us "Your kids won't look like you if you marry a white person!" I have a friend that was asked if she was her kid's nanny, because her kid has light brown hair like her white father. My friend is a black-haired Indian woman.

JOYTOME Member

JOYTOME

Posted
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I like white guys, black guys and brown guys...(basically I find men from varied racial backgrounds attractive) but I'll most likely marry some one from my race because of mutual values e.g religion. Not because I find said people most attractive.

USMCHokie Established Member

USMCHokie

Posted
Posted
It's not about race really but about skin tone. I not attracted women who are too dark in appear. Doesn't matter if they are white women, black, or whatever.

 

Skin tone, facial features, and physique distinctive to the race are all more determinative than the race itself. It really isn't about the race, but rather what people of that race look like.

JuneJulySeptember Established Member

JuneJulySeptember

Posted
Posted
People that don't date their own does raise some flags. How can you not be attracted to your own ethnic background? Hard to believe but it does happen.

 

Crosses all ethnicites, crosses both genders.

 

AHAHAHAHA!

 

Apparently you don't know too many Asian American women. :lmao:

USMCHokie Established Member

USMCHokie

Posted
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AHAHAHAHA!

 

Apparently you don't know too many Asian American women. :lmao:

 

Ah yes, those people... :rolleyes:

Buttercup84 Established Member

Buttercup84

Posted
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I am white, and have been attracted to Indian, latin, black, Asian, Aboriginal etc.

 

I do not really have look that I go for.

USMCHokie Established Member

USMCHokie

Posted
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I do not really have look that I go for.

 

Hypothesized Generalization: Men tend to have particular looks they go for (i.e., preferences), while women tend to have particular looks that they stay away from (deal breakers).

 

I think I'm onto a winner with this one... :bunny:

JuneJulySeptember Established Member

JuneJulySeptember

Posted
Posted
I am white, and have been attracted to Indian, latin, black, Asian, Aboriginal etc.

 

I do not really have look that I go for.

 

Although a lot of white women say this, I rarely see it.

 

White women with other types of guys that is. I mean, every now and then I do, maybe 1 out of 10 or 15. That's not a lot.

 

If I meet an Asian American women, there's a 33% chance she's never dated an Asian guy before.

USMCHokie Established Member

USMCHokie

Posted
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Although a lot of white women say this, I rarely see it.

 

Words and actions are two different things.

Feelin Frisky Established Member

Feelin Frisky

Posted
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Now race doesn't matter at all. But growing up I was the first of eight children and we lived in a two family house with my mom's family upstairs which she was the first of seven. I am therefore the first of a rather big generation with siblings, nieces, nephews, cousins etc. Getting into an inter-racial relationship and expected it to not register as a big thing was impossible in my youth yet I did it anyway in my 20s. Today in my 50s however, things are entirely different and I am not this person everyone expects to be a role model. Even my mother would condone a relationship as long as we're happy.

ses Established Member

ses

Posted
Posted
AHAHAHAHA!

 

Apparently you don't know too many Asian American women. :lmao:

 

Yes, statistically Asian-American women do participate in interracial marriages at a higher rate than other racial groups...however I recently read a NY Times article that stated more Asian-American women are choosing other Asians as their partners due to the shared cultural and linguistic heritage. I have many Asian-American friends who are dating other Asians, too. I don't believe my other friends actively sought to date outside their race. They dated/married for the same reasons others do: shared interests and mutual compatibility.

 

I'm the product of an interracial marriage (my father is white American, and mother is Korean). I am attracted to my own mixed background (among others) but I've never attracted much interest from Asian men, unfortunately. The one Korean-American guy I liked when I was 15 had an interest in our mutual friend, a white girl. ;)

JuneJulySeptember Established Member

JuneJulySeptember

Posted
Posted
Yes, statistically Asian-American women do participate in interracial marriages at a higher rate than other racial groups...however I recently read a NY Times article that stated more Asian-American women are choosing other Asians as their partners due to the shared cultural and linguistic heritage. I have many Asian-American friends who are dating other Asians, too. I don't believe my other friends actively sought to date outside their race. They dated/married for the same reasons others do: shared interests and mutual compatibility.

 

I'm the product of an interracial marriage (my father is white American, and mother is Korean). I am attracted to my own mixed background (among others) but I've never attracted much interest from Asian men, unfortunately. The one Korean-American guy I liked when I was 15 had an interest in our mutual friend, a white girl. ;)

 

It's not just that they end up choosing white men. That I don't so much have a problem with. It's that they WON'T date Asian guys. Almost none of them admit it.

 

But they have their pick of white guys, why would they date an Asian guy.

Ninjainpajamas Established Member

Ninjainpajamas

Posted
Posted

Personally, I don't even understand how people could lean towards any particular race. I've dated a variety of women and If you're guy I'd say you're missing out. But then again I just may be a lover of women, I see the woman not the race.

 

So as far as how much race matters to me? close to zero, however with that being said, I don't look what I am...most people assume I am white, and If I did not look white, I doubt I would have been able to date the women of different races that I have been able to.

 

But then again that also may be because of height as well, women can be as selective about race as they are with height, and luckily I'm tall so I know that has helped me, as well as body type.

USMCHokie Established Member

USMCHokie

Posted
Posted
Personally, I don't even understand how people could lean towards any particular race. I've dated a variety of women and If you're guy I'd say you're missing out. But then again I just may be a lover of women, I see the woman not the race.

 

So as far as how much race matters to me? close to zero, however with that being said, I don't look what I am...most people assume I am white, and If I did not look white, I doubt I would have been able to date the women of different races that I have been able to.

 

But then again that also may be because of height as well, women can be as selective about race as they are with height, and luckily I'm tall so I know that has helped me, as well as body type.

 

Corollary to my last hypothesized generalization: Race matters more to women. :laugh:

Emilia Established Member

Emilia

Posted
Posted

I think men cast their net wider by nature, some of it is about exploring and variety, some of it is to exploit the poverty non-white races sometimes live in. I've dated men from different races but then I used to live in different cultures so it's hardly surprising. I'm also more curious than your average woman when it comes to these things. When I was younger I kept a tally :D

Emilia Established Member

Emilia

Posted
Posted
Y

and i think people think that every race have a certain way of thinking and handling.

so i think sometimes thats why they want that certain type.

but i think its stupid to go fr a certain race just cause of the color.

without looking for the inside.

True though I have a weakness for big brown eyes so that's what I'll notice. I also like caramel skin but then again I like beautiful translucent skin too. There is a lot to like in this world :)

  • Like 1
soccerrprp Established Member

soccerrprp

Posted
Posted (edited)
I am white, and have been attracted to Indian, latin, black, Asian, Aboriginal etc.

 

I do not really have look that I go for.

 

I DO have a "look" that I go for. It just so happens that it can be found in all ethnic groups. (hate the term "race." biologically speaking, we are of the same "race."). But, interestingly enough, most women I date(d) are caucasian or latina.

Edited by soccerrprp
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