shatteredworld Posted April 6, 2013 Posted April 6, 2013 Sorry if this is a bit of a rant! I just reached a month of NC, a week and a half into it I found out he had a new girlfriend (after only being broken up for a month) and for the most part I have no desire to even contact him anymore. I always thought that NC would help me move on and stop thinking about him, but he's still on my mind just as often as he was a month ago. I've blocked every way of seeing him on the internet, I even have found myself regressing and constantly being afraid I'll run into him somewhere around campus. I feel like it would be a huge setback if I saw him with his new girl. I rarely even go out anymore because I'm so afraid of seeing him. He hurt me so bad and I still find myself dwelling over it, I really try not to and tell myself all the things I can do with my life now, how I can do better and deserve better, and that he wasn't even all that special. Yet I still am constantly thinking about what went wrong, why he doesn't want me, and what I could've done differently. I just want these feelings to end because it's really been so long and clearly he's a huge a**hole and I should be getting over it by now.
MizBabyKat Posted April 6, 2013 Posted April 6, 2013 Awwwww! D': I'm so sorry! I totally feel ya girl!! I'm like..in the SAME exact boat. It sucks! BIG TIME! </3 All I can say is..in time..it will get better. It may go by slowly, but hey, it will soon enough get better. I know it's superrr hard!! Trust me, I feel ya. But you know this shouldn't be affecting your life, and what you do!! I know it's scary/upsetting at the thought of running into him, especially with his new girl..but hey, if it happens, then just act like you don't care! (: That's the best thing you can do..although it's hard. I know. But I know you can do it, if you really try. <3 And I'm sure you deserve alot better!! Keep your head up!! And I'm always here for you! I wish you luck! May things get better in no time.
Author shatteredworld Posted April 6, 2013 Author Posted April 6, 2013 Awwwww! D': I'm so sorry! I totally feel ya girl!! I'm like..in the SAME exact boat. It sucks! BIG TIME! </3 All I can say is..in time..it will get better. It may go by slowly, but hey, it will soon enough get better. I know it's superrr hard!! Trust me, I feel ya. But you know this shouldn't be affecting your life, and what you do!! I know it's scary/upsetting at the thought of running into him, especially with his new girl..but hey, if it happens, then just act like you don't care! (: That's the best thing you can do..although it's hard. I know. But I know you can do it, if you really try. <3 And I'm sure you deserve alot better!! Keep your head up!! And I'm always here for you! I wish you luck! May things get better in no time. Ugh I really hope so, this whole new girlfriend situation has significantly made my thoughts that much more negative too! I'm constantly thinking about how much I failed in the relationship and how I pushed him to cheat. I feel so stupid as well for believing I meant something to him, when in actuality I meant nothing if he was able to find someone else that fast. I feel so worthless and unimportant, even after 2 months. I just really thought NC was supposed to make me move on and forget, I feel like it's just giving me more questions
MizBabyKat Posted April 6, 2013 Posted April 6, 2013 I really do feel your pain girl. :/ It's horrible, I know. My ex just got into a relationship the other night with some random chick. We haven't even been broken up for a full month yet!! I'm so heartbroken and confused, it's sickening. But I wouldn't go onto full assumptions that you meant nothing to him. Did he actually cheat on you?
siankat Posted April 6, 2013 Posted April 6, 2013 Really sorry to hear you are hurting but by doing all ur doing, you are building your character (doesn't feel like anything good is coming out of this but there is, just that the benefits you might see later rather than now). Unfortunately in my experience of seeing people my age and older generations, people rarely change ther m.o. They might mellow or not have the energy to get up to mischief like they once did but people don't change. Sounds like your boyfriend is young so that might be part of it but if he cheated etc that involves a lot more things in him than what he did to you and how you feel (if that's how it happened) and therefore you are better off out of it, no matter what the reasons you think some of the blame lies with you. He's responsible for his actions, and they were not good.
Author shatteredworld Posted April 6, 2013 Author Posted April 6, 2013 I really do feel your pain girl. :/ It's horrible, I know. My ex just got into a relationship the other night with some random chick. We haven't even been broken up for a full month yet!! I'm so heartbroken and confused, it's sickening. But I wouldn't go onto full assumptions that you meant nothing to him. Did he actually cheat on you? I'm so sorry to hear that, that's how I felt when I first found out. I was so incredibly nauseous and I even threw up. He told me he wasn't looking for anyone, he didn't want anyone else, and how I had his heart and I could do anything I wanted with it cause he didn't want it back unless we were together. This was all just a month before he got into a relationship too. It's the worst feeling in the world realizing it was all a lie. Yeah he did cheat, he told me he did and then said he "couldn't allow me to take him back" I would just think if I meant something to him he wouldn't have treated me so bad in the end.
Author shatteredworld Posted April 6, 2013 Author Posted April 6, 2013 Really sorry to hear you are hurting but by doing all ur doing, you are building your character (doesn't feel like anything good is coming out of this but there is, just that the benefits you might see later rather than now). Unfortunately in my experience of seeing people my age and older generations, people rarely change ther m.o. They might mellow or not have the energy to get up to mischief like they once did but people don't change. Sounds like your boyfriend is young so that might be part of it but if he cheated etc that involves a lot more things in him than what he did to you and how you feel (if that's how it happened) and therefore you are better off out of it, no matter what the reasons you think some of the blame lies with you. He's responsible for his actions, and they were not good. I really hope this is all worth it in the end because right now I feel like a fool. He must just be bad, I've been trying to find the good in him throughout all of this but I just don't think it's there. You're right about being better off though, I know I am. I knew it at the time. But that's just not how much heart feels, I guess.
siankat Posted April 6, 2013 Posted April 6, 2013 Sounds like you got him and the situation sussed. Your feelings will catch up with what your head is saying soon, and you will feel so empowered when that happens. Stay true to you and strong, Good luck
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