steveT95 Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 She has hurt me so much and she doesn't even realise it because she is so selfish. I am so mad at her and have so much I want to say to her. Help?
geegirl Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 It's normal to feel anger. It's part of the process of grieving. Everyone that has gone through heartbreak, will suffer the need to seek justice for being wronged. Unfortunately, no matter how much you dump on the the person that wronged you, it won't alleviate your pain and anger, nor will it create a situation whereby you can suddenly let go and move on. It's a process that you have to face and go through. She may be selfish but you also have to understand that she's not emotionally attached anymore, therefore, she's not consciously sitting there thinking about your pains. She's going on with her life because she's now focused elsewhere. Selfish or not, it's not her responsibility to right a wrong because she can't right that wrong. Breakups happen. It's ugly and it's unfair. But that's the risk we take when we give ourselves wholeheatedly to someone else. When the s*** hits the fan, you have to suffer the consequences and barrel through the grieving and healing process on your own. Vent on here.. You cannot accomplish anything by seeking comfort from your source of pain. 3
Author steveT95 Posted April 5, 2013 Author Posted April 5, 2013 I don't want comfort from her, I want her to know what a sh*tty selfish person she is Thanks though I shall vent here
geegirl Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 I don't want comfort from her, I want her to know what a sh*tty selfish person she is Thanks though I shall vent here It won't register with her. She'll just brush it off as you being bitter. And even if she did feel remotely bad, it'll be a very fleeting emotion and she'll soon be going about her day. Dumpees project their hurt and pain on the dumper, thinking there will be reciprocal emotions, but sadly there isn't. They're detached. It won't affect them.
Author steveT95 Posted April 5, 2013 Author Posted April 5, 2013 Thank you, Geegirl. That has helped a lot.
geegirl Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 Thank you, Geegirl. That has helped a lot. You're on day 2 of NC. You're doing great. Vent here when you feel weak or the need to reach out. NC will get you somewhere. Breaking it won't. 1
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