SJC2008 Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 (edited) Went out tonight with a buddy... Later into the night we noticed an attractive older woman, we're in our very early 30's. I seen her accross from us at a table and made eye contact with her and smiled and she gave this resuce me look lol! Anyway, we go outside to smoke and she comes out a few mins later and introduces herself to my friend and I. I was pretty sure she was interested in me at first and we all talked and such. I'd say my conversational skills are average/good with most people. I'll throw a joke in here and there, can make most people laugh. BUT my friend is on a whole other level! SO the convo picked up between them, and I did the right thing IMO and backed off and chimed in here and there. We said our goodbyes and she shook my friends hand and then mine. I put my arm around her and got close to her and asked her for her phone number and she said "But you didn't show interest". I was thinking wtf? I told her you were talking to my friend etc and she said I'm too old for you (she's 45) and I said I'm no spring chicken lol and said give me your number and let's see what happens. She did, we made more small talk and said our goodbyes. As much as I HATE the word social skills, especially here. I think I followed "protocol" in that the convo was picking up between her and my friend. I backed off like I said but still chimed in etc. I didn't want to cock block just in case she was interested in him. We're both cool like that and if we see if a woman is interested in the other we'll back off, it's not a "free for all". As to me not showing her interest, what should I have done? I made eye contact, joked around etc. She flirted with me toward the end saying she has a weakness for redheads! I don't know what elese I should of done? I was pretty sure she was interested but when the convo between her and my friend took off I was second guessing and as stated many times here, a lot of men are bad at reading women. I wasn't about to interrupt the convo she was having with my friend and take over. Any ideas how to handle a situation like this and to show more interest? Edited April 5, 2013 by SJC2008 punctuation 1
Noproblem Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 I think you handled things well, but some women want more straightforward guys! 2
Djz05 Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 I think you did exactly the right thing. After all, bros before h***. It's much harder to find a good friend and wing than it is to find a girl at a bar that's dtf lol. There will be many more, my friend. Props to you OP. There will be other times. Good friends are hard to come by (they take your bad along with the good). 2
Author SJC2008 Posted April 5, 2013 Author Posted April 5, 2013 I think you did exactly the right thing. After all, bros before h***. It's much harder to find a good friend and wing than it is to find a girl at a bar that's dtf lol. There will be many more, my friend. It may have gotten lost in my long post but I DID get her number! I'm just wondering if this should be a learning experience for me? Mabye I should of flirted with her? Been more aggressive jumping into the conversation? I don't know, I didn't want to interrupt the flow of things. Yeah when she told my friend the readhead line he told me "that's your cue" lol! We're cool like that.
ChessPieceFace Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 Wow, she's nagging you and questioning your actions before you even go on your first date. Sounds like a keeper ...
StanMusial Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 Went out tonight with a buddy... Later into the night we noticed an attractive older woman, we're in our very early 30's. I seen her accross from us at a table and made eye contact with her and smiled and she gave this resuce me look lol! Anyway, we go outside to smoke and she comes out a few mins later and introduces herself to my friend and I. I was pretty sure she was interested in me at first and we all talked and such. I'd say my conversational skills are average/good with most people. I'll throw a joke in here and there, can make most people laugh. BUT my friend is on a whole other level! SO the convo picked up between them, and I did the right thing IMO and backed off and chimed in here and there. We said our goodbyes and she shook my friends hand and then mine. I put my arm around her and got close to her and asked her for her phone number and she said "But you didn't show interest". I was thinking wtf? I told her you were talking to my friend etc and she said I'm too old for you (she's 45) and I said I'm no spring chicken lol and said give me your number and let's see what happens. She did, we made more small talk and said our goodbyes. As much as I HATE the word social skills, especially here. I think I followed "protocol" in that the convo was picking up between her and my friend. I backed off like I said but still chimed in etc. I didn't want to cock block just in case she was interested in him. We're both cool like that and if we see if a woman is interested in the other we'll back off, it's not a "free for all". As to me not showing her interest, what should I have done? I made eye contact, joked around etc. She flirted with me toward the end saying she has a weakness for redheads! I don't know what elese I should of done? I was pretty sure she was interested but when the convo between her and my friend took off I was second guessing and as stated many times here, a lot of men are bad at reading women. I wasn't about to interrupt the convo she was having with my friend and take over. Any ideas how to handle a situation like this and to show more interest? That is kind of a weird thing to say in that situation. Maybe she didn't like you that much?
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