Minka82 Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 I went on a first meet with a guy on Monday evening. Prior to meeting we exchanged a few emails and seemed to share similar interests and values. We had great conversation for the 1.5 hours we spent together - we met in a park and went for a walk. At the end of the date we hugged and he said he had a good time and talk soon. I wasn't sure whether he was interested, although the conversation was good, and he mirrored my body language, I just wanted sure - never am on a first date. I know that I am very much the same person as I am online in both looks and personality and I am generally considered reasonably attractive. Okay, so that's fine.. I wasn't sure. He then texted me 30 mins after the date and said "Great to meet you Minka, great chats. Have a good week, talk soon Mark." I replied about 40 mins later (I was driving at the time) and said "Lovely to meet you too. Look forward to hearing from you, Minka." That was 3 days ago. I haven't heard any follow up. I don't know if I'm being impatient, or whether it is clear he is not interested. We are both in our late 20s, busy professionals. I know we wouldn't probably have time to meet up before the weekend, but I thought we might plan ahead if he were interested. Guys, do you text a girl after a date and say "talk soon" both in person and in text if you have no intention to do so? I know feelings can change, he may meet other girls in between etc etc... but on average?? Minka
Noproblem Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 Is he playing games! Or is he just not interested!
Lani Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 It's only been 3 days. As far as I'm aware, guys play it cool within the first few dates, so he's probably just not wanting to seem overeager. Give it a few more days before you start reading into anything. 4
suladas Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 It's tough to say, I've went from hot to cold about a girl instantly, it's weird how it can work. But texting after a date like that he liked you or he wouldn't have texted. I personally contact much sooner, but others are different I'd give it a few more days before getting worried.
Author Minka82 Posted April 4, 2013 Author Posted April 4, 2013 I think he's not into me. Which is OK. Better to get it out of my system now. I guess I am used to guys who pursue me... albeit these are generally the guys I'm not that into, so I don't even count the days between dates and contact. This guy was someone I could see a spark with... and all contact appeared to confirm that, until the end of the 1st date. I just feel like he isn't into me. I don't understand why he bothered to send me the immediate text saying "talk soon" if he didn't intend to though - surely he would understand that gave me false "hope" that he was into me. Minka
Eternal Sunshine Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 Some guys are just polite. Although, whenever a guy texted me like that, he was interested in seeing me again.
aussietigerwolf Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 I've had guys that say that and are never heard from again.
Noproblem Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 to tell you the truth, when I read his message, I thought it was a polite good bye...You are great, but bye bye bye Nsync
soccerrprp Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 I NEVER NEVER make my interest to see a woman again known by texting/calling/emailing minutes, hours after a date. I tell them right at the end of the date, in person. I hope, if interested, he's not another person who dabbles with the silly 3-day or more rule, etc. No one is THAT busy. If he's not using silly dating rules, he would have contacted you by now and scheduled another date. It may have been a polite, though disingenuous, way of rejecting the OP. 2
RedRobin Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 He said have a good week. That means, he doesn't intend to talk to you again for at least a week. 3
Kamille Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 He said have a good week. That means, he doesn't intend to talk to you again for at least a week. Was going to point out the same. I'm wondering why gaging his interest level is such a priority after a single 1.5 hour date. You can't possibly be crazy madly in love with him since, well, you hardly know him. In your shoes, I would try to avoid getting anxious over "interest levels" too soon. It makes dating so much easier. If he writes back he writes back. If he doesn't, you had a nice pleasant evening with someone you thought was cute. 3
Eternal Sunshine Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 I NEVER NEVER make my interest to see a woman again known by texting/calling/emailing minutes, hours after a date. I tell them right at the end of the date, in person. I hope, if interested, he's not another person who dabbles with the silly 3-day or more rule, etc. No one is THAT busy. If he's not using silly dating rules, he would have contacted you by now and scheduled another date. It may have been a polite, though disingenuous, way of rejecting the OP. This has been my experience as well. Men that are interested ask me out before the end of the date. But in the early stages like Kamille said, it's best not to even think about it. You guys are strangers, there can't be any real feelings involved yet, unless you make them up in your mind
Star Gazer Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 As saludas has, guys can change their mind quite quickly. He probably had fondness when he texted, but if you haven't heard from him since, I wouldn't hold your breath.
Standard-Fare Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 I do question why he would add the "Talk soon" line when it was unnecessary, that's confusing, but just sit on it and see what happens. You've already responded positively so there's nothing more you should do. I once had a guy text me about an hour after a date, saying he had a great time and "wanted to take me out for dinner sometime next week." I was asleep at the time he sent the text, and sent something short and positive back the next day. Never heard from him again. These things do happen. You can't invest too much in any first date.
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