Amahon06 Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 I have already posted on here before about my ex coming back after 7 months. The relationship ended really badly simply bc I didn't trust him and was constantly on his stuff about everything. Simply put, after he broke my trust we tried to work things out, I just couldn't shake what he had done to me on more than one occasion. Now he said he never "cheated" but cheating can be classified as hiding texts from females, going on dates with them, flirting, inappropriate conversations to full on physical contact. reguardless the borderlines of what u shouldn't do while in a relationship were crossed more than once. I was so sad and heartbroken because for the life of me I couldn't figure out what in the world i did to even deserve it. We were so good for so long and it's like one day we woke up and it all went to hell. I was just so angry, sad, shattered, u name it. That I didn't know how to act. I acted out like a one woman destruction crew. U name it i ruined it. I just didnt understand how after 6 years it just went to crap! It just feels like one woman showed him attention other than me and it was game over. It's like he craved attention from other women. And I gave him all he ever wanted. I loved him tremendously. What wasnt I doing? I didn't understand. this tug of war with different girls, felt like as soon as I got rid of one, there was another and the crazy thing is ALL these girls KNEW about me, it's just she nor he didnt care. How can people be so cruel. I had finally had enough and I told him to move out. I couldn't stand being alone after the first couple months so I moved back 300 miles away to be with my family. I was so sad. I spent night sitting in the corner of my empty apartment we shared together crying my eyes out. I was a wreck I had officially hit rock bottom emotionally, I didn't wanna live anymore, dieing seemed like the better way to deal with it bc every time my heart beat, it pumped pain thought my whole body. (Sad I know right) so to better myself I came home to be with my family so I could have a support system and get myself back on my feet...well 3 months later I started dating a guy I've known pretty much my whole life, eventho I wasn't fully healed or satisfied it was nice to have someone show me affection, attention, want to be part of my life...but it was no where near the "completeness" I felt with my ex, but I understood I must move on and i had to start somewhere. Anywho, that relationship didnt really last. Now 7 months down the road my ex of 8 years came back to me in the beginning of march and gave me this big speech about how he'd changed, he learned his lesson, he realized how much I did for us not just in the relationship but around the house, how much he missed me, loved me, only saw me in his future, wanted his only children to come from my body, he was sorry, so on so fourth. Of course my heart was screaming YES DO IT!!! But my mind kept replaying the things that happened and how I felt...but I decided to give it another run, but we decided to keep things long distance just for now, so we didnt rush back into anything. Well after the first week or two, he stops calling, says he will call and never does, never face times anymore, all that. It starts to scare me because all those old feelings starts to scratch at the surface. I begin to feel sad again, unworthy, unimportant. I couldn't justify...you know eventho he said he didn't plan on getting hit with a new promotion that required a lot of time to get adjusted to...he says lately he's been working open to close which is 10am-10pm..and he's home by 1030. Why can't he just call for a second?!? Ya know?! He asked 100 percent from me, why can't he at least call or something...like am I wrong to get mad and address it? I think so. He blew me off all the time and it really upset me...so yes I did start accusing him of hiding me from someone or someone from me. I just couldn't justify...he came back to ME!!! But he can't call not even for a second...he says he's working open to close now because someone took a better job and everything has kinda fallen into his lap to take care of until he finds a replacement...but seriously...no communication at all...he says the biggest part of not talking to me lately is because I'm back to not trusting him again...but I mean can u really much blame me? Giving what's happened before and the lack of effort reguardless...I mean even if I was busy, if I truly loved someone I'd at least make the effort to call every night. But he doesn't...I sit here night in and night out feeling neglected, alone, unworthy, like he doesn't care, like he's out doing whatever, lieing, many different things run thru my mind. I have no proof he's sorry, regrets losing me, learned his lesson I'm his future...am I overreacting, am I valid in my feelings! I'm back to being so confused...am I honestly wasting my time trying again!!! Ughhhhhhh help
Noma Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 If you truly want him in your life, try to relax. If you can't handle that he won't call every time you think he should, then tell him it's over. It really could e that he is exhausted with the extra work. You know him. And you need to decide what you are willing to put up for, for yourself. My brother has a traveling job, gone mon-thurs every week. But his wife deals with it because they love each other. What are you willing to deal with? Everyone has different expectations in a RS. Will it be like this forever? Or just for now?
Author Amahon06 Posted April 4, 2013 Author Posted April 4, 2013 I mean I'm sure ur brother calls every night right?! I know my brother does the same thing he works in different states mostly and he's always like 4-6hrsaway and puts in long hours but at least he calls in to talk to my sister in law every night and even sometimes he works 6 days a week he still makes the drive back to see his family. I mean if my brother can do that, I'm sure my ex can make a phone call at 1030pm for a big right?! Am I honestly asking too much here? I mean I really think not...I could be wrong but if my own brother can drive in Saturday night just to drive back home Sunday afternoon, my ex can at least call?! Right?!
Author Amahon06 Posted April 4, 2013 Author Posted April 4, 2013 And the crazy part is, after the past 2.5 years...I honestly thought I knew him but I dont know this person he has become at all...and he's done me so dirty living under the same roof, now we are 300 miles away! Imagine what could be going on at this point! I drive myself nuts
Noma Posted April 4, 2013 Posted April 4, 2013 Sounds like you are ready to let him go. You can't trust him. NC. To move on and heal. But maybe try to meet up and discuss how you feel first. It's up to you.
Author Amahon06 Posted April 4, 2013 Author Posted April 4, 2013 Well we can't meet up now bc I moved back home 5 months ago and were 300 miles apart now. I just don't understand that why did he come back after 7 months to not even try, excuse his pathetic attempts, never call fill my head full of crap. Then break my heart all over again! It's so annoying
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