is it normal to check your exes Facebook? and admit to not being over her

[harper78]

I was the one that blocked her but check her Facebook via a friend but all I can see is pic of her and her new girlfriend (gay couple) playing happy families with her kids? It kills me I know I should not do it. I finished with her because it was a toxic relationship and she told me she loved me loads but it still ended. I since had my baby girl and she came to the scan with me and touched my belly, She must wonder about the baby. I just wish I stayed friends and never told her to get out of my life. She used to stalk all her exes on facebook. She seems to hate me more though, mutual friend said she won't let me see the dog I helped her raise and I bought. She said she moved on in less than one week after I told her I did not want to see anymore.

 

My friend said that I only asked to see the dog and bring the dog to me. I will not go to her house. I admit I am not over it all but I am sure we could never get back together. I know she is happy from seeing all her pics of her smiling with her new girl and the dog and I am happy for her but wish I could let go or we could have stayed friends.

[Am4Real]

Normal? What is normal from a breakup?

 

Ughhhh...nothing!

 

However, you should not be checking FB or any other of these immature social mediums where people love to brag about their boring and insecure lives. Why punish yourself? Fight the urge with all your might.

[MW93i]

Yes it is normal, it will get better when the days go by too. You'll find yourself checking less and less. Then it will get to the point where you'll ask yourself what are you getting out of checking up on them and choose to move on.

 

 

I'm currently in the process of "checking up" but I've been through it before and it's going exactly the same.

 

and.. ofcourse it's normal to admit not being over her. You'll know when you are buddy.

 

Best of luck you to.

[Am4Real]

Wrong -- it's stalking 101 -- only it's electronic versus covert physical actions.

 

The intentions are the same, to get information about a person who does not which to have you in their lives.

 

Since this OP is asking if it's normal, I largely suspect they also realize the pain it is producing.

 

You can use a knife when you eat dinner tonight - but it's not a tool to cut yourself!

 

 

Yes it is normal, it will get better when the days go by too. You'll find yourself checking less and less. Then it will get to the point where you'll ask yourself what are you getting out of checking up on them and choose to move on.

 

 

I'm currently in the process of "checking up" but I've been through it before and it's going exactly the same.

 

and.. ofcourse it's normal to admit not being over her. You'll know when you are buddy.

 

Best of luck you to.

[lissa90]

Checking facebook is like picking at a scab. Each time you do it, you pick that scab off and it starts to bleed all over again.

 

There is nothing on that page that will put you in a better mood, it will only hinder it.

I sympathise with you though, but the old saying of "curiosity killed the cat" springs to mind.

 

Every time you go to check it, get off the internet, put down your phone and try to distract yourself from doing it.

 

Focus on your little girl now, and when you feel like you need/want/have to maintain a friendship with your ex, remember how she moved on so quickly from you.

[harper78]

Yeah it is like going back to square one again. and that is only looking at a profile pic imagine people that are checking full profiles. Not good at all. MAKES ME WANT TO VOMIT. Can't work out why I do it? Yeah my little girl is amazing. I am focused on her. It is the what if's I guess. I guess checking exes facebook is not normal then? lol Why do we do it??

[lissa90]

I'd say it is normal to a degree - its not healthy, but I do think its normal.

 

When you are out of someones life, someone you cared so much about, its very difficult to go cold turkey.

 

Just remember that it doesn't accomplish anything, apart from more pain.

[lissa90]

I'd say it was more akin to asking a mutual friend "are they happy/with someone else/ are they sad/ do you think they miss me?" Type of thing. You kind of bypass the mutual friend because you can see it right there on face book.

 

I do agree with you in that it isn't the right way to go about things and to get over them. But sometimes you hurt yourself over and over and over until one day you realise its not worth the pain or find another way to distract yourself.

 

I'll openly admit to checking his facebook, even though I've been unfriended, I wouldn't say its stalking per say (some would I guess) more that I need to get to that point where I realise its all counter productive.

 

Like I said to the OP, the only thing you gain in doing it is hurting yourself more.

[harper78]

Well I did not go on yesterday. Truth is it is a form of mental torture. Just thinking of that pic of the kids with the new girlfriend is horrible. Sure she done it on purpose but then again I starting to imagine things. I can't ee much so in my head is all rosy in her world. My friend actually told me that her relationship is moving so fast, she has gone funny.

 

I decided to keep away because I was feeling :sick::sick:literally pit of my stomach. Warning to all who are not 110% over your ex it is not good for you at all to see their lives and them moving on. Now I need to follow it through when it gets hard I must distract myself. The funny thing is, when we were together it was her constantly checking on her exes facebook and trying to get information about them. :eek: im turning into her!!

Also I was the one that cut al contact with her. And she asked me if I wanted her I said no, we were always fighting, she was also taling to other women online. She said she loved me but I think sh did but she had so much baggage from her exes previous to me. She said she would stay single yet was online websites straight away talking to others all the time even though we were just friends. Although she still fancied me because she would try it on. I was pregnant and not in the mood for games. She so wanted to see this baby too so I do wonder how she can just move on so quickly and not think about me at all.

 

Sorry ranting on. Stay away from Facebook.. well at least your exes page.