aeren944 Posted April 2, 2013 Posted April 2, 2013 So, it's been about 3 years since I ended things with the mother of my kids. We share my kids, splitting them weekly. She had cheated on me, and it totally destroyed me. I'm much better now. Have no need to be with her. Happy to be only talking to her about kids. Things are generally good for me. Here's the thing, though... I live in a smaller town, so I don't have many options to meet women. Also, I work in a call center, so no chance to meet women as customers. The thing is, I really don't know if I'm ready to meet women. I do still get lonely. It would be nice to have a relationship, but I don't think I'm like stuck on it. That's kind of what scares me, though. I think it would be in my best interest to find a woman, but maybe not. Also, I'm very self critical, so I'm not sure if I'm shooting myself in the foot with that, or it's helping. Also, like I said, I don't have much selection here. So, I'm 32, have 2 kids... I'm not looking for a mother for my kids. they already have there's. But, I don't want trouble or drama. I'm attracted to trouble, though, in a way. I don't need that in my life. So, I don't know if I'm being like a sniper, and shooting each woman I meet down, or if I'm still hiding or something. I DO know that the drama junk with my ex, the whole breakup, the betrayal, totally ****ed me up... like, bad. I feel like I've lost myself or my "game". It was a 7 year relationship, lasting most of my 20s. Anyone have any advice on this? Am I being retarded and hiding? How do I get to where I push myself to advance toward dating or something?
gravi1 Posted April 3, 2013 Posted April 3, 2013 I will atempt to give you light on his situation. I also broke upcause of recently because of cheating. I am glad you are now over that situation despite it .............cking you up badly, and yes I know what you are talking about. Firstly,and I say this out of my experience and wanting to articulate feelings and the situation as a man. If and once your lady visits somewhere,it outs a big question mark on your entire manhood, am I sufficient, is my size ok, can I fullfill her etc.Also biologicaly women are build inward so its like you yourself have been violated also, I mean you cant realy wash it out vs wash off. Its a mess, your ego and pride are badly damaged and it can take a very long time to repair, I am not an expert but you being insecure about this and having very little interest to put some effort to persue women shows this. I would think, dont think of starting relationships, because you start to pre empt right away,what might happen and this puts you off, naturaly I also compare women with my ex and it becomes difficult to look past that.Just try looking for a female friend, doesnt matter how she looks or her social standing, just anyone as long as its not weird, like an old lady or married woman or someone underage. You will be ok,just put some effort into it and expect some rejection which also I presume goes with the packet of your dissapointment and betrayal. Get ready for some love games. 1
Recommended Posts