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Posted

I'm in a new relationship. We are exclusive as of a few days ago. But it is going to be a long-distance relationship within a week or so.

I'm new to relationships in general (this is my first boyfriend) and I'm taking small steps to learn how it all works and be vulnerable.

We got very intimate (no sex though) after we decided we were official, and I'm a bit nervous because his texts aren't as lovey-dovey after the fact. Because of my sexual inexperience, I realize I failed to tell him how much I enjoyed our intimacy and how much I loved how strong he was and knew how to be with me, which I know can sometimes make guys a bit inadequate if they haven't had that reassurance.

 

Do guys like being texted by girls they are dating, with things like "I want your arms around me right now", or "I wish you were here with me" etc. Or do most of them consider this aggressive? Or perhaps the girls chasing? Also, is the chase over once you are official? I.e. is this what is happening?

 

Thanks you guys.

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Posted

Please, anybody?

 

Maybe I should work on my thread titles too lol...

Posted

It sounds like a text I'd like to get. :o

  • Author
Posted
It sounds like a text I'd like to get. :o

 

Hehe :) Well that gives me confidence, thank you :)

Posted

I've only gotten texts like that after I was intimiate with someone. before then, it just seems creepy, IMO.

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Posted
I've only gotten texts like that after I was intimiate with someone. before then, it just seems creepy, IMO.

 

I can see that. But what you are saying is that it is not creepy to say it after being intimate then?

Posted
I can see that. But what you are saying is that it is not creepy to say it after being intimate then?

 

each relationship is different. ive done it once or twice, out of the few girls ive been intimate with.

Posted

First relationship - that's exciting :)!

 

How long were you two dating before hand?

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Posted
First relationship - that's exciting :)!

 

How long were you two dating before hand?

 

Thank you! I'm a late bloomer :)

 

We have been dating exactly 4 months to the day. Why do you ask?

Posted

You and I as well. I didn't get my first kiss until I was 22 - it's a rush to finally understand and feel what it's like to be passionate about someone and have that returned. Best of luck and have fun with it!

 

Interms of the lovey dovey texts, you've been dating long enough that it's not that creepy. Feel free to send 'wish you were here' texts, but I'd leave the more physical desires (want to feel your strong arms around me, etc) until after you two become intimate - otherwise he might get the impression that you're ready for intimacy - sex specifically - which im not sure is the message you're specifically trying to convey. That's what I would assume if I got a text like that

  • Like 1
Posted

Im all about flirting, showing affection, and lovey dovey texts. me and my GF do it all the time. say what you feel. we send pictures (ur not there yet-although a G rated pic should make him smile) and we send really nasty texts as well. it does good. but yes we are both very vocal. maybe you have to set the pace with him.

 

and I'm taking small steps to learn how it all works and be vulnerable.

 

I like that. but there are guys who will not be open and use youre vulnerability to make themselves feel superior and keep you down.

  • Author
Posted
You and I as well. I didn't get my first kiss until I was 22 - it's a rush to finally understand and feel what it's like to be passionate about someone and have that returned. Best of luck and have fun with it!

 

Interms of the lovey dovey texts, you've been dating long enough that it's not that creepy. Feel free to send 'wish you were here' texts, but I'd leave the more physical desires (want to feel your strong arms around me, etc) until after you two become intimate - otherwise he might get the impression that you're ready for intimacy - sex specifically - which im not sure is the message you're specifically trying to convey. That's what I would assume if I got a text like that

 

That's really good advice :) I sometimes get swept away with a fantasy before I'm ready for doing something in reality... Thank you!

  • Author
Posted
Im all about flirting, showing affection, and lovey dovey texts. me and my GF do it all the time. say what you feel. we send pictures (ur not there yet-although a G rated pic should make him smile) and we send really nasty texts as well. it does good. but yes we are both very vocal. maybe you have to set the pace with him.

 

and I'm taking small steps to learn how it all works and be vulnerable.

 

I like that. but there are guys who will not be open and use youre vulnerability to make themselves feel superior and keep you down.

 

That's good to know. And also really good advice. Such wise, caring people on this site! :)

 

My guy is pretty open to expressing himself, so I think it'll just take me warming up...

 

Are you and your girlfriend in a long-distance relationship?

Posted
We got very intimate (no sex though
That is?

 

his texts aren't as lovey-dovey after the fact.
What fact? Being intimate? Getting officially together? Going LD?

 

I failed to tell him how much I enjoyed our intimacy and how much I loved how strong he was
I hope you are going to answer my first question, because I'm not sure how he can show he's strong while being intimate with you without having sex... I guess I'm missing something here.

 

Anyway, how did you get the idea that "I wish you were here" is aggressive? I think it's romantic, actually. I'm not a man, but aggressive? Really? How old are you?

 

"I want your arms around me right now" = Again, I'm not a guy, but the strongest thing in that sentence - if you ask me - is not in the image of having his arms around you, rather the "I WANT". That's a strong urge. That's how I perceive it. You're at the very beginning with this guy.

Until few days ago, he was kissing and making out with other girls. I would take it slow. But that's just me. What do you know about the other girls he's been dating? Why did he choose you? Did he tell you?

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