Jord11 Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 40 whole days and I miss her so much, I loved this girl with all my heart, I don't know if I should hate her or love her or if she misses me or even thinks about me anymore, I hope she regrets what she's done, I was nothing but the best too her
AloneInParadise Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 I'm in the same boat, my friend, the only difference is it's only been 7-9 days no contact and it's killing me. Like you I treated her great, better than any other girl in my life, and she still left. Be strong man and know it's for the best. At least that's what I'm telling myself.
TheFriend Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 40 days is impressive. It's awful but there will be relief. I have kept contact. Very very f****d up contact and have gotten so much stronger. It's amazing how people can make us fall then leave seem to not care at all. 1
mtnbiker3000 Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 I'm in the same boat, my friend, the only difference is it's only been 7-9 days no contact and it's killing me. Like you I treated her great, better than any other girl in my life, and she still left. I'm at 14 days NC, and it seems to be getting harder The first few days (about a week) I was feeling strong and not dwelling too much. Now, I find myself spending a lot of time wondering what she is doing and thinking. Does she miss me? Is she struggling with NC? Is she moving on with difficulty? With ease? I find myself recounting so many experiences we shared and how she might be remembering them now. Times when I may have acted foolish, stupid, mean, cheap or immature. Does she say "Good riddance?" Or does she even remember these times the same as I do, or at all? It seems so important to me how she is remembering me. I am really longing for the time when I won't be so obsessed with what she is thinking. I want to focus on what I need now. Just hard to do... 1
Thunderchild Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 40-something days (43 or 44) kinda lost count. I know it's over 6 weeks. Still feel the pain of the break up - it was a 5 year relationship. Things getting better. I know I don't want her back - she cheated on me and got pregnant by the other guy. She ain't coming back into my life, and I mean ever again. She has her baby to hide her guilt (if she has any) behind now. She really won't give a sh*t about anything else in the world except that sprog now - ultimately, a truly selfish b*tch. Thank God I didn't marry her. She cheated, got what she wanted and threw me under a bus - good riddance to garbage. Unfortunately, I don't believe in Karma, and no doubt this is one cheat who will prosper. C'est La Vie. So, I'm moving on. Getting back into shape, I'm already down about 2 stone in weight, and a long way to go yet. Getting out and about, making new friends. My work is still keeping me going, and my career is flourishing. I've finally sold my house; so I can make a fresh start somewhere else if I need to. I'm far from out of the woods yet, but I can see the way ahead and know where I want to be.
mtnbiker3000 Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 I think it's true that the bigger the a-hole a guy is, the better the chances are of keeping your woman. I'll never be that way though...not that kind of person unless i'm forced to be but if thats the case, i dont wanna be in a relationship like that. I wonder/worry about this too. Seems like this is the case I have observed time and time again. But I agree. That's not me... Just seems like women get bored, lose interest or just don't feel challenged after a while of being treated well. Maybe there is a happy medium. Maybe?
Author Jord11 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Posted April 1, 2013 I'm there with you man! Only 14 days n/c for me though and it's not getting any easier. What gets me is she told me early on in the relationship not to break her heart and here she is the one that broke mine. I treated her very well, never lied to her, never cheated, never yelled or raised a hand on her. I think it's true that the bigger the a-hole a guy is, the better the chances are of keeping your woman. I'll never be that way though...not that kind of person unless i'm forced to be but if thats the case, i dont wanna be in a relationship like that. I know what you mean, we would lay in bed and she told me never to break her heart and I promised her that I would never will, then she broke mine into peices
targaryen Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 Clicked on this thread because I'm in the same boat - 43/44 days of NC and 56 days since the break up and it's still not easy. I think of her at least twice an hour! Whether it's a memory, or wondering what she's up to, or if she's thinking about me, this is absolute madness. I thought it was supposed to be better after 60 days of NC but that magical number is approaching and it's still not
Thunderchild Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 She cheated, got what she wanted and threw me under a bus - good riddance to garbage. Unfortunately, I don't believe in Karma, and no doubt this is one cheat who will prosper. C'est La Vie. I don't believe in karma either. Karma isn't a christian word. God doesn't pay people back here on earth...judgement day is when you go meet him. I don't believe in the Christian version either! The future may throw a spanner in her works - you never know someone might cheat on her (!) - but I'll never have the satisfaction of seeing it. The best I can do is move on, try to forget, make a successful life for myself and be happy in my own right. I dodged a bullet, that's a good enough "victory" for me.
mtnbiker3000 Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 I know what you mean, we would lay in bed and she told me never to break her heart and I promised her that I would never will, then she broke mine into peices It's all a bunch of f'ing BS. It really makes me nervous about the future...
mtnbiker3000 Posted April 1, 2013 Posted April 1, 2013 I think this may be the deal in my situation. I think she got bored and I wasn't a challenge anymore. Part of me thinks she will come back but my feelings on that are up and down all the time. So, what to do differently next time? Stay guarded. Keep them at arms length? Get involved with someone we don't care so much about. Or just jump in again and hope it works??
TheFriend Posted April 2, 2013 Posted April 2, 2013 That is a great question.... I am terrified of another relationship. I had a concrete shelled heart, surrounded by iron casting that my ex slowly broke through over time. She got to the prize then BAMMM. Smashed it.... I was a real tough and rough bastard before her when it came to relationships. Not physically just emotionally. I was afraid of EXACTALLY what happened. I don't think I will be ready to expose my heart again like that for some while. I'm thinking concrete, titanium, iron, and forged steel for a case this time.
BrokenHeartedSavior Posted April 2, 2013 Posted April 2, 2013 (edited) Nearly eight years of her complaining that she was "just my girlfriend" so in year number eight I blow around 7.5K on a ring- thinking she deserves it for waiting for so many years... BAMMMM!!! I got dumped within 2 months of being engaged! I guess the chase was over, or she "won the game" Go figure... But here I am nearly a year later, still think of her, but I must admit-only very recently has it gotten SLIGHTLY easier. Think I'm starting to heal. "I'm wasting my time, she's having the time of her life!" REMEMBER THAT. Edited April 2, 2013 by BrokenHeartedSavior Spell error 1
TheFriend Posted April 2, 2013 Posted April 2, 2013 I am sorry brokenhearted. That is a long time to have been with her and then to have her walk away. I am glad you are getting stronger. I have been going out again and living. I hope everyone can get to this point.
BrokenHeartedSavior Posted April 2, 2013 Posted April 2, 2013 TheFriend, Thanks, and yes we all will.
Author Jord11 Posted April 2, 2013 Author Posted April 2, 2013 I still don't know how they can Just walk away and feel no pain
BrokenHeartedSavior Posted April 2, 2013 Posted April 2, 2013 Idealy I'd like to think not, i know i never could, but its been a long time for me- and i never heard back. Clearly she's moved on and does not think of me after all those years. I would tend to think that=no pain.
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