Says he wants us back together...Then I find his profile on POF?

[BrokenHearted101]

Yeahhhhhhhhhh. Title says it all.

My other posts are about how we're working on things, we're not back together yet, but he claims he wants us to work it out.

 

He use to have to POF accounts. One was all screwed up (avman) and he made it on vacation a year ago. The other was his real one. He deleted the real one when we had a discussion about it, and we didnt really worry about the other one because i knew it was for a different state (where he'd been on vacation before we got together a year ago), and it didnt have any pics/real info/etc.

 

Anyways..I just had this weird itch today that I needed to google his other POF profile, the one i know stil exists. Fortunately, I remember the user name. I typed it in..It pops up...I click on it..What do you know? THe city and info have all been corrected, and..there's pics. All his pics. But it gets better, and this is the part that breaks my heart. There's a pic of ME and him. ME. MY PIC, IS ON POF. I remember the pic, because i TOOK IT! WITH MY PHONE!

 

I'm shaking mad. He's out of cell service right now, with his grandparents and his dad, and I know we're not back together yet, and that he probably updated all of this before we seriously started trying to reconcile..but still..I looked at the CACHED VERSION ON GOOGLE: He's made these changes in the last 2 weeks. I feel so bizarre--he didnt update his profile when we broke up, no, he waited til now?

 

I just don't even know what to do right now. I don't feel like it's a deal breaker, but i feel like it's a heart breaker. Advice or a hug anyone? I feel so stupid, and having a picture of myself on there hurts.

[TaraMaiden]

"What a man says, may be taken with a pinch of salt.

What a man does, will show his true intent.

When a man says for sure it's all my fault,

Be sure, the joke's on you, is what he meant."

 

Poem by me.

 

Just now.

 

Quite good really, isn't it|?

 

And bang on the money, darling.

 

You really nee to call this over and done with.

 

He's wiping his feet on your heart, all the while wearing his "aren't' you glad I called by?" smile....

[BrokenHearted101]

Addition: I made a fake profile when i found out he had one all that time ago. I still had the log in details in my old emails. I logged in and looked: He was last online TODAY.

 

He's in Nevada right now, at his dad's--that means he had to have logged on this morning, just to dick around on there. The sickest part? He apparently viewed my fake profile (which doesn't have pics or anything, by the way).

 

While I think it's fine for him to shop around while he's still single..He'd be livid if I did this.

I feel like such an idiot. I guess we all know what he means now by "talk to your parents or I'm moving on soon."

 

The weirdest part is it's not even like I'm hurt right now. I'm upset, sure, but it's more of an, "Ohhh..****..look what he does while he's single." I dont expect him to take it down unless we get back together, but still..Im bummed.

I'm so tempted to post a link to the profile on here!! WHO WANTS IT?

Edited March 31, 2013 by BrokenHearted101

[BrokenHearted101]

Just a little update: I mentioned the profile discovery to him Saturday night. He seemed completely non plussed. He took down the pic that included me, but says he "wont delete the profile til I talk to my dad".

Meanwhile...I dont feel like the profile should even be a bargaining chip. If he wants to get back together with me, why is it there? Period. It's not like this profile was up, and I'm asking for it taken down. No, he put pics on it, and made it over...LAST WEEK. After he'd already started hanging out with me again, and talking to me daily. He didn't even do this while we were NC for a month, he does it NOW?

 

He doesnt know I created a log in just to check--he apparently thinks I'm dumber than I am. I can tell he's been online off and on almost all day. With my fake account..I wrote him "Hey" (I dont have any pics). Just to test to see if he's THAT eager to meet new girls. He wrote back "No pic :(" How shallow is that? He's that desperate AND shallow? He's basically been conversing back and forth with me all day..Having no clue it's me.

 

He went to his dad's for Easter Holiday. Today is Monday--he should have driven back last night. He missed all his classes today, to stay there. Apparently an old buddy of his is in town, and they've been running about all day. It's 4:20 in the afternoon. I called him, (and he seemed annoyed) because..His dog is in the kennel, here, and they close at 6:00pm. It's a 3hr drive home--he wont make it in time before they close, and puppy would have to be in there another night (more $$$). So he asked if I could get the dog, and he'll pay me back. So in a little while I'm going to go get Luke (and then, since I don't have a key to his apartment, I'm going to have ot keep Luke with me at my night job til he gets home).

 

I feel like it's time for an ultimatum of my own: Either delete the POF account, NOW, or there's no reason for me to go talk to my dad. There's no reason to. He can have all the girls he wants on pof, or he can have me. But he CANNOT have both. I think I've been more than nice about this.

 

Anyone got any words of support to get me to stick ot my guns? I can be rational, but then my heart starts weighing out my smart.

[TaraMaiden]

Leave the dog where it is.

If he's playing tough cookie, so can you.

 

For god's sake woman.....

 

Please stop this nonsense now.

Just dump him.

He's just completely messing around with you, I really cannot for the life of me understand why you let this man treat you in this way -and then you agree to go and pick up his phukking DOG!!!

 

He's running around behind your back chasing skirt, he's neglecting his responsibilities regarding his classes - and he's flirting with 'you' and doesn't know who you are.... what the hell are you playing at??

 

 

For goodness' sake, this needs no more analysis - just leave for chrissakes!

 

And let him pick up his own damn dog!

[stillfighting77]

Hi, I am in a similar situation as you. To summarize my situation as much as possible, I originally met my guy on POF. We dated for a few months and then he left me for his ex. A week after that, I found out I was pregnant.

 

That was two years ago. He just came back to town in January. At that time, he talked about us getting back together even though I said I wanted to start out as friends. I noticed he had a POF account without a picture, and he closed it when I confronted him about it. He told me that he set it up to see if I had one on there.

 

He texted me a lot for the first couple of weeks he was back in town. Then he stayed with me for a week, and started talking to me less and less. I was afraid to check to see if he had a POF profile set up, but I later found out that he was dating a girl the same time he was sending me texts that he missed me. I'm guessing he met her on POF.

 

Anyway, since January, there has not been any real efforts from him for us to get back together. He knows I am in love with him, and he has told me that he loves me too, but he can't settle down. At one point, he even told me that he couldn't commit to me or anything. So he left town for a couple of weeks for a job in Februray, and then came back again saying that he missed me, loved me, and would even like to do the "marriage thing." So I picked him up from the bus station, but haven't heard much from him since dropping him off at his dad's a couple weeks ago.

 

He has a new POF account that he started when he was away in February. I visited him this past Friday with our daughter, and I haven't heard from him since then. I just know that he is meeting girls from POF again, and it really hurts. Why talk about getting together and being with me if you're still looking around?

 

I don't think my story will help you at all. Your post just caught my eye when I saw POF and trying to work things out. It really hurts, and I want you to know you're not alone.

 

I do want to add that I don't think it's necesarily a deal breaker. Our situations might be completely different. I even had a POF account for a while when I thought we were over, and it was fun just to be able to talk to people sometimes, not necessarily look for a date.

 

I hope things work out for you!!!

[Flier]

If he wants to get back together, he should not be advertising for other women online. Run like the wind... I had a similar situation and wish that I had not wasted my time. Men who do that cannot be trusted.