Notify him about non contact (or not being friends), or not? Complicated

[Bebe_Doll]

It's simple, basically my question is, if you decide to do No Contact w/ an ex to try to get him/her back, do you have to notify him/her about this?

If I just decide to NOT notify him about my doing "non contact" and only ignore him all together, do you think he will realize what he has lost still? (or does it have to be put harshly). I think it's because if I tell him I want to do "No Contact", it might justify him moving on. This is the last thing I want!i!i Because unfortunately, he has recently started dating another girl just week after he told me he still had feelings for me! I 'm really tired of seeming desperate. Just a quick question, I'll go into it more later.

[hurtingandconfused]

Don't tell him. Just do it.

[Honesty]

If you are just taking time off then maybe you should tell him, because when you want to talk to him he might be too hurt from you ignoring his phone call and/or not returning them to want to talk to you. If he is important to you tell him. If you just don't want to talk to him anymore then you don't have to tell him!

[snilljente]

How long did you guys date, how old are you, why did you break up....I have these questions, because I have real hesitations about someone who jumps into a new relationship after recently telling someone else they still care (been there done that)..If I had more info about your situation it would help me to know what to think

[Bebe_Doll]

well hm. we were together 4 about 3 and a half years and he broke up with me sometime in Jan '04. Around summer we told each other we liked each other a lot, but he told me that we couldn't do nething about it cuz of the geographical distance b/w us.

 

Anyways, we kept on flirting in the summer, until he had to go away on a trip somewhere in Europe. The day B4 he left (sometime in Aug) I told him that I had been seeing this guy after he broke up with me & he said he was a little hurt but OK with it. I eventually figured out he was a rebound so I stopped seeing him around May.

 

When my ex arrived back from his trip @ the end of the summer we continued to flirt, but then a little while after that he told me he started seeing this girl!

 

So that's some of the info that may help you figure out how I should handle this "no contact" deal I mentioned earlier in my post. (the top of this Thread) Hope it helps

[snilljente]

I would just tell him that you are not interested in doing the back and forth thing and that you think it is best if you go your separate ways and don't have contact at this point because it is too hard to have contact when you are seeing other people. He will either let you go, which will be an answer in and of itself, or he will fight to get your back....and stop seeing other people.