skweezd Posted March 28, 2013 Posted March 28, 2013 To paint the picture, I was absolutely crazy about a man for six months. He always sent me mixed signals. After this emotional roller coaster ride, I decided to end things nicely because I wanted to feel more wanted. my heart was (and still is) broken. He was my ideal man, minus the emotional neglect. In his defense, he was always nice but stayed even emotionally. Two months of no contact and I send an email telling him I'm still thinking of him and basically bleeding my heart out in this email but kept it short and sweet. At the end I say "no response necessary". Well, he responds in a very corporate manner (he's an executive at a major corporation) and it's like reading something he wrote to a coworker. It's polite but very matter-of-fact. I go back and forth with a few exchanges but never, once again, feel like he has any emotion in his response. Hard sword to swallow. Now I feel like a fool for emailing. What a hard lesson to learn.
theloyalone1 Posted March 28, 2013 Posted March 28, 2013 Not a fool for emailing. you needed to know for certain. You had guts to reach out and take that risk. we have to take risks in order to move on or make things work. simple. now you have your final answer . of course its something you didnt want to witness and we have high expectations. but no sugar coating, he isn't looking for what you want right now. wish you the best 4
Cutiepie1976 Posted March 28, 2013 Posted March 28, 2013 Don't beat yourself up! So you reached out? We all get urges. It happens. As a result, you got a reminder of why you chose to break up, and the resolve to stick with your decision. See it as a positive. Not what you had hoped for, but you got the clarity you needed to progress with your life. That's what matters. 2
Author skweezd Posted March 28, 2013 Author Posted March 28, 2013 Thank you. It's been a tough, tough road. Though now there are no question marks in my head and I hope to find my focus again. It's amazing how your feelings can really screw with your head. Time heals they say.... 2
Damsel in Distress Posted March 28, 2013 Posted March 28, 2013 I'm sorry you got that kind of response, but if you hadn't sent the message you would keep wondering. I get a similar urge - I get a feeling that I don't want to miss an opportunity, and if the door is cracked at all I need to poke something in there to open it up a little more. Truth is, I know there's no crack in the door... and I thank you for sharing your experience - more evidence to convince me that I shouldn't be looking for a crack in a door that was slammed shut 6 weeks ago. I'm so sorry, but hopefully this will help you move on. Hugs. 2
Wabisabi Posted March 28, 2013 Posted March 28, 2013 Time does heal...thanks for sharing. Makes me more resolute in not breaking NC. 1
Author skweezd Posted March 28, 2013 Author Posted March 28, 2013 Love the crack in the door analogy Damsel. So true. Had I gotten a more open-ended response from him, I'm sure I would have started the communication all over and once again been disappointed. I'm glad the door was shut in my face. Gives me clarity
Compromize Posted March 28, 2013 Posted March 28, 2013 I'm sorry you got that kind of response, but if you hadn't sent the message you would keep wondering. I get a similar urge - I get a feeling that I don't want to miss an opportunity, and if the door is cracked at all I need to poke something in there to open it up a little more. Truth is, I know there's no crack in the door... I keep seeing the crack in the door, especially early in the morning while I am getting ready for work/getting my kids up and ready when I used to send her a good morning baby text or surprise her with pictures for her to wake up too. I miss that, knowing someone wanted to wake up to me in some way and wanted to do the same for me. :( I have yet to crack although I have been as close as almost hitting "SEND" but deleting before I do. he responds in a very corporate manner (he's an executive at a major corporation) and it's like reading something he wrote to a coworker. It's polite but very matter-of-fact Damsel, I think with this at least you can say "Well I tried!" I am still waiting (2 weeks now) for a response from her to the question about us working things out. Sending something without getting a response is the worst and it takes me literally a week to stop at least initially obsessing over it. "I can't stand it that I care for her so fu#king much!!! Why can't I care about someone that I can actually have?? Why won't she answer me me??" Isn't that the question we are all asking ourselves? I think I stubbed me toe on the crack in the door.... I for one Damsel, applaud you for your efforts. A lesson learned the hard way is one best learned and smooth seas don't make good sailors.
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