Tk123 Posted March 27, 2013 Posted March 27, 2013 Hey there guys. I made a post the other day about a Long Distance Relationship that I was in. I met this girl on Facebook and we clicked so well chatting on Skype, texting, etc. everyday. She texted me yesterday and told me she missed the times we had when we started dating (we were together for quite a few months now). She said she feels like that "spark" we had was gone and she said it's because of her depression. She always was a depressed girl and I did the best I could to be there to love and support her. Lately a lot of stuff has been going on with her life. Over the course of time that we started dating until the day we broke up yesterday, two of her family members were dying from cancer, one of her parents straight up abandoned her, and she really had a lot on her plate working long hours with her job. (Shes 20 and I'm 19). Her exact words to me last night were "I still love you but I just need to be alone sadly." She later went on to say to me "I don't want anyone right now, I'd rather be with you when I'm myself". She wants to try again when **** dies down in her life and I completely respect that. My question to you great people is this: What do I do from here? I still got EXTREMELY strong feelings for this girl. We have yet to meet yet and had everything planned out to meet for the first time in person this summer. She really was the only person I needed. Is it weird if we still try and talk every day despite our break up? I feel like I need to be there to support her and get through this tough time she's going through. Finally, I know she says she still loves me and needs to be alone however, do any of you think there is hope that we will be together again or am I just "friend listed" permanently now. I would greatly appreciate any feedback any of you got for me. We broke up on what I say were good terms and are still great friends, it just sucks that this depression got the best of her. I really need guidance on where to go from here. Your help is greatly appreciated and may God bless all of you.
polyglot Posted March 27, 2013 Posted March 27, 2013 Hey there guys. I made a post the other day about a Long Distance Relationship that I was in. I met this girl on Facebook and we clicked so well chatting on Skype, texting, etc. everyday. She texted me yesterday and told me she missed the times we had when we started dating (we were together for quite a few months now). She said she feels like that "spark" we had was gone and she said it's because of her depression. She always was a depressed girl and I did the best I could to be there to love and support her. Lately a lot of stuff has been going on with her life. Over the course of time that we started dating until the day we broke up yesterday, two of her family members were dying from cancer, one of her parents straight up abandoned her, and she really had a lot on her plate working long hours with her job. (Shes 20 and I'm 19). Her exact words to me last night were "I still love you but I just need to be alone sadly." She later went on to say to me "I don't want anyone right now, I'd rather be with you when I'm myself". She wants to try again when **** dies down in her life and I completely respect that. My question to you great people is this: What do I do from here? I still got EXTREMELY strong feelings for this girl. We have yet to meet yet and had everything planned out to meet for the first time in person this summer. She really was the only person I needed. Is it weird if we still try and talk every day despite our break up? I feel like I need to be there to support her and get through this tough time she's going through. Finally, I know she says she still loves me and needs to be alone however, do any of you think there is hope that we will be together again or am I just "friend listed" permanently now. I would greatly appreciate any feedback any of you got for me. We broke up on what I say were good terms and are still great friends, it just sucks that this depression got the best of her. I really need guidance on where to go from here. Your help is greatly appreciated and may God bless all of you. If a girl loves you, she doesn't ask for time to be alone. Instead she will want to speak to you longer than usual - It's a Red Flag. Yes it's possible you are probably shift on a "Friend List" i.e. you are being politely refused. It's hard to give up from your vantage point. Unfortunately it's the reality. You can do an NC. Withdraw yourself slowly. This is a very nice way of BU, from the girl's vantage point. If she goes paranoid over your NC, then, she's likely to return. You don't know how long it takes for her to really go paranoid. If she doesn't return. it's simply a BU from her side. If I am in your situation, I will wait for some time, but I won't be checking on her profile or any contacts I knew through her. It's unnecessary. Relationship with girls means, you need to be around them. It simply doesn't work that way i.e. being far. Dude avoid her, begin NC. Your strong feelings doesn't bother her right now. Do not give her a chance to keep you a back up. It's also not necessary she's going out with somebody, but she just want to get rid of what she's doing now. That's just an excuse wanting to be alone.
Chris516 Posted March 27, 2013 Posted March 27, 2013 Hey there guys. I made a post the other day about a Long Distance Relationship that I was in. I met this girl on Facebook and we clicked so well chatting on Skype, texting, etc. everyday. She texted me yesterday and told me she missed the times we had when we started dating (we were together for quite a few months now). She said she feels like that "spark" we had was gone and she said it's because of her depression. She always was a depressed girl and I did the best I could to be there to love and support her. Lately a lot of stuff has been going on with her life. Over the course of time that we started dating until the day we broke up yesterday, two of her family members were dying from cancer, one of her parents straight up abandoned her, and she really had a lot on her plate working long hours with her job. (Shes 20 and I'm 19). Her exact words to me last night were "I still love you but I just need to be alone sadly." She later went on to say to me "I don't want anyone right now, I'd rather be with you when I'm myself". She wants to try again when **** dies down in her life and I completely respect that. My question to you great people is this: What do I do from here? I still got EXTREMELY strong feelings for this girl. We have yet to meet yet and had everything planned out to meet for the first time in person this summer. She really was the only person I needed. Is it weird if we still try and talk every day despite our break up? I feel like I need to be there to support her and get through this tough time she's going through. Finally, I know she says she still loves me and needs to be alone however, do any of you think there is hope that we will be together again or am I just "friend listed" permanently now. I would greatly appreciate any feedback any of you got for me. We broke up on what I say were good terms and are still great friends, it just sucks that this depression got the best of her. I really need guidance on where to go from here. Your help is greatly appreciated and may God bless all of you. Your ex is consumed by her Depression. My ex is consumed by her OCD. So, From a mental health standpoint I know what you are feeling.
Author Tk123 Posted March 27, 2013 Author Posted March 27, 2013 If a girl loves you, she doesn't ask for time to be alone. Instead she will want to speak to you longer than usual - It's a Red Flag. Yes it's possible you are probably shift on a "Friend List" i.e. you are being politely refused. It's hard to give up from your vantage point. Unfortunately it's the reality. You can do an NC. Withdraw yourself slowly. This is a very nice way of BU, from the girl's vantage point. If she goes paranoid over your NC, then, she's likely to return. You don't know how long it takes for her to really go paranoid. If she doesn't return. it's simply a BU from her side. If I am in your situation, I will wait for some time, but I won't be checking on her profile or any contacts I knew through her. It's unnecessary. Relationship with girls means, you need to be around them. It simply doesn't work that way i.e. being far. Dude avoid her, begin NC. Your strong feelings doesn't bother her right now. Do not give her a chance to keep you a back up. It's also not necessary she's going out with somebody, but she just want to get rid of what she's doing now. That's just an excuse wanting to be alone. Thank you for this. It really means a lot. I will start with the NC thing and see how that works. Your ex is consumed by her Depression. My ex is consumed by her OCD. So, From a mental health standpoint I know what you are feeling. I did everything I possibly could to help with her depression. I even offered to take off from college and drive down 10+ hours to her to be there for her and she wouldn't let me. I don't know what else I could have possibly done for her and I don't know what any other guy is gonna offer her that I didn't already. It sucks man. If anyone else has anything to add, it means a lot. I'm so humbled and appreciative.
Author Tk123 Posted March 27, 2013 Author Posted March 27, 2013 Anyone got anything else to add? I really need the advice!
lovelyde Posted March 27, 2013 Posted March 27, 2013 She's being set up as someone's wife in the spiritual world. She's coming into realization of something. Unfortunately you're not on her mind. Though I will give you advice. Start looking at other women within your social circle. There's a possibility one of them are trying to get your attention but you are ignoring her. Who is it that you respect and wish to be with? This is very important. Forget all those people you pine after. They mean nothing. -
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