targaryen Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 Quick summary as I'm on my lunch break: girlfriend of 4 years broke it off because she felt we were too young (22/23) to be in a committed relationship already. This happened 7 weeks ago, almost two months now. I've been on NC for 5 weeks and until last week I was doing fine with not caring. However lately I've had this yearning for her...and I have a 'feeling' she is experiencing the same (I have no proof of this so it's probably in my head.) I know that if I contact her via email/calling/facebook/sms she won't respond as she's maintaining NC 'to heal and move on' - her words. But I have a feeling I can still woo her if I go a bit more unique/special in my approach; in other words use unique knowledge that I - and no other guy - has about her, maybe build a bit on the nostalgia. I keep thinking that I should send her a mysterious letter with the lines for a Battleship game drawn out. We used to play this with pen and paper against each other and was iconic/special to us. I'm imagining us playing the game by sending letters back and forth for example 'six across/five down' and that's it. It would be silent communication. It would be a nice and different way to reconnect. I've thought of other ways too. For example I was going to send her a postcard with a picnic/sunset scene and scribble on the back 'join me at our place next friday' and then I'd welcome her... To be honest I know it's not going to turn the relationship back around - it's too late for that- but I wouldn't mind an erotic friendship with her. Why am I such a hopeless romantic? You would think that after two long term relationships where both girls left me I'd be a bit more jaded. I haven't sent this because my fear is she won't respond the way I'm imagining it. However I can't stop thinking about this grand romantic plan.
TaraMaiden Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 You'd better. It's not 'Romantic' it's not a plan, and above all, it's not grand. It's a nose-dive into disaster. If you want an erotic friendship with her, what you are actually looking for is a phukk-buddy'. A FWB. Undignified, crazy and not productive in any way shape or form. It will end in tears. Now focus on your lunch, chew properly, and digest your food as you should. Bon appetit.
Author targaryen Posted March 26, 2013 Author Posted March 26, 2013 My first choice would be getting the relationship back but failing that erotic friendship sounds like a plausible alternative considering we'll both be travelling around several countries during the next few years anyway...
Darren Steez Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 Quick summary as I'm on my lunch break: girlfriend of 4 years broke it off because she felt we were too young (22/23) to be in a committed relationship already. This happened 7 weeks ago, almost two months now. I've been on NC for 5 weeks and until last week I was doing fine with not caring. However lately I've had this yearning for her...and I have a 'feeling' she is experiencing the same (I have no proof of this so it's probably in my head.) I know that if I contact her via email/calling/facebook/sms she won't respond as she's maintaining NC 'to heal and move on' - her words. But I have a feeling I can still woo her if I go a bit more unique/special in my approach; in other words use unique knowledge that I - and no other guy - has about her, maybe build a bit on the nostalgia. I keep thinking that I should send her a mysterious letter with the lines for a Battleship game drawn out. We used to play this with pen and paper against each other and was iconic/special to us. I'm imagining us playing the game by sending letters back and forth for example 'six across/five down' and that's it. It would be silent communication. It would be a nice and different way to reconnect. I've thought of other ways too. For example I was going to send her a postcard with a picnic/sunset scene and scribble on the back 'join me at our place next friday' and then I'd welcome her... To be honest I know it's not going to turn the relationship back around - it's too late for that- but I wouldn't mind an erotic friendship with her. Why am I such a hopeless romantic? You would think that after two long term relationships where both girls left me I'd be a bit more jaded. I haven't sent this because my fear is she won't respond the way I'm imagining it. However I can't stop thinking about this grand romantic plan. No! You have a yearning for her. She does not feel the same. She broke up with you for a reason, if she wanted you back she would tell you. Don't break NC and stop trying to manipulate her into dates by sending cards etc. She said she was too young to be in a committed relationship. Sounds like she may want to be free and explore other people or maybe she just wants to be free without being tied down to a man. She told you what she wants, listen to her and respect it. Even if you don't like it.
TaraMaiden Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 Plausible to you. Not plausible to her.... that's why she broke it off with you. She's done, having sex with you. She wants to try it with someone else. And if you're going to be moving round the country, and not seeing each other, that gives her the perfect opportunity to do just that.... Why carry on having sex with someone you want to move on from?
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