Bazinga Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 My ex boyfriend who I've had a long history of ups and downs with will be near my city in about a month (this is a LDR by the way, he lives across the country). We recently had a huge fight and he told me that once and for all we need to stop talking and so I let him be for a week but I am obviously regretting this decision and told him that I want to see him during his conference but I needed the schedule to make sure I can get away for those few days. He sent me the schedule but told me that he feels like I am toying with him but really and truly, all I want to do is see him and I told him so. I made sure everything fit and messaged him the next day letting him know that I'd love to book a train ticket and no response. I waited a few days and tried again, asking him to call me so I can explain to him my change of heart... no reply. A few days again after that I became exasperated and told him that I wish he'd just contact me and let me know if its ok to book this train ticket and he read my message again and nothing. Tried to call him, no pick up. I'm confused as to why he would send me his schedule if he didn't want me to come. As of right now, his conference is still a month away. I know this is all very confusing but I have no idea what to do... try to contact him AGAIN even though i've tried 3 times already? leave him alone? should i have emailed him instead of expecting him to call me? its hard to gauge what to do when he won't respond... he won't even tell me to leave him alone and he hasn't given be a definitive "no i dont want to see you." could he just be playing mind games with me because he knows it hurts my feelings? and no, i've never done this to him. we've been through so much, its hard to tell if this is really the end or a game.
TaraMaiden Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 No. He's using the admirable 'No Contact' strategy. He said you shouldn't talk, and that's what he meant. I suspect he regrets sending you his schedule, and now refuses to engage with you on anything - because actually, he doesn't want to see you. It sounds very much as if he has terminated this relationship. Sadly, you may have to take this on the chin and accept it. 1
Author Bazinga Posted March 25, 2013 Author Posted March 25, 2013 Thank you, i didn't expect such a quick reply! I'm thinking that after so much time has passed that you're right. He's never shown so much restraint towards me before and we've played games many times. It hasn't been a healthy relationship and I understand, yet still want to see him. Anyway, thanks for your honesty.
MarinaX Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 so hard to say when i don't know the whole scoop...especially if this is a constant battle between the two of you. i'd say that best case scenario you leave him alone for a little while and let him rethink some things. if he cares about you it may not be the end but don;t hold onto that for dear life. you probably don't realize it yet, but him avoiding you may be the best thing for you. unfortunately rejection sucks and its a hard blow to the ego but a relationship built on mind games is worse. 1
lovelyde Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 You're way better than him. You know it. Just accept that you're ahead of him. 1
EnLove Posted March 27, 2013 Posted March 27, 2013 Spam his phone! Or just call. I believe if you love someone you don't just give up! You keep trying until you're out of options! I would go movie on his ass and pop up but this is real life. If after you spam his phone or call and he still doesn't respond leave him alone! He doesn't care anymore so why should you! And what are males so damn hard to understand
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