3 Months No Contact! But After That We Can Be Friends Again! Help Me Understand This!

[kalari26267]

I have posted a few times on here about this situation with my ex. I am so hurt and confused at the moment I just don't know what to do with myself! Basically to give some history my ex and I were together for 7 months. We broke up a few times but never really broke up because we were always still together and got back together.

 

The last month we have been split up. We still hung out together trying to be friends but we always ended up acting like bf/gf( having sex and lovey dovey). 2 weeks ago, I called him from the bar I was at ( he was at a friends house for his friends birthday party) asked him to come hang out with me at the bar he said he couldn't but I could come to the party where he was at.I said I couldn't..so I texted him a few hours later asking him to come and get me since I wasn't able to drive..he said okay. He showed up at the bar with some friends and we all hung out He was telling everyone there that I was his gf..I was like no, we aren't together anymore remember..he was like well we are back together as of tonight. Then we left and went to his friends house were one of the guys there was talking to us about our relationship..he basically kept contradicting himself by saying he loves me and blah blah blah but can't see a future with me....for whatever reasons. We didn't sleep together that night due to us both being pretty intoxicated.

 

The next day we hung out together and we did end up sleeping together..Then he went back to the I don't think we can be together and we should have some space in between us...Well we hung out a couple more times last week..the first time we hung out was strictly platonic. the next time we were acting like we were back together..but then the next day when he was leaving he said he was serious that we shouldn't talk or anything for 3 months...I don't understand what 3 months is going to accomplish?? If he thinks I am going to just not be in love with him then he is crazy! He still says he loves me but isn't "in" love with me..I just dont' understand what the difference is..I asked him if he just loved me as a friend and he said no it is more than that...well I have tried to contact him (went almost 5 days with NC) told him he left some things at my house ..he wrote back saying he would get them in a few months..then I preceeded to ask him WHY we can't be friends NOW!..he said we just can't...he then wrote me this email tonight and I just don't know what to do or think about this situation..I love the man soooo much and want to marry him...which I know i can want in one hand and poo in the other and see what fills up faster but still....lol...this is the email he wrote me:

 

I don't hate you and I never will. If you truly want to be my friend then give me my three months. That is what I asked for and that's what I need. Have fun at the fair. Keep this email in mind whenever you want to hate me or get mad cause I don't respond.. because this will be this will be the last one for awhile. I want you to succeed. I am glad you found someone else. Things will be different in the future. I am gone out of your life for three months. Its nothing personal. If we can't be friends after that.. that is your choice. I will still want to be good friends after that. Good luck with school. Bye for now. Talk to you in 3 months whether you want to or not... that's up to you. But I will be calling in 2-3 months. So if you change your number or email in that span of time... email me and let me know. Otherwise I won't be able to contact you. Bye love

 

I told him..which is sorta true that I am interested in someone else..I am trying to move on..but it is soo hard when my heart and soul belong to this man. He isn't seeing anyone else yet or hadn't been that I know of...I know he is talking to girls that live thousands of miles away from him...but hasn't started dating anyone per se....I do want him back but I also understand that if we can't be together romantically that i don't want life without him in it even if it is just a friendship..he was my best friend and I have never loved anyone like I do him...I just am going crazy that he could walk away from me without any regrets..I have basically made myself seem pathetic and desparate but that is basically what I am..I am afraid that if we can't be friends now and keep our bond we have that we won't ever be friends again even though he states that is what he wants but not for 3 months...somebody please help me..I just started college again and am doing Pre-Law and I know that I am going to end up screwing it up because of this situation I am in with him..I can't eat,sleep, or think straight because of it...PLEASE HELP!!

[mighty bop]

7 months being together is hardly enough time to get to know somebody. Let alone wanting to marry them!! He probably thinks you are too clingy, so he is hoping that by 3 months you will have moved on and forgotten about him, which I am sure you will. Don't expect him to call though. Start talking to this new guy and pretty soon you will forget about the ex.

 

Chris