jenwon Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 I'd be totally down with a guy (or a girl) who has their own life, their own stuff, and we are exclusive, but don't spend a ton of time together. +1 I think I was happiest when I was in an LDR. Only saw each other a few times a month. So we had to make the most of the limited time we had when we were together. No wasted moments.
apple OR orange Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 generally you will enjoy anything you "choose" to do, so theres things i really like that others dont. Same for you and being single, i assume you get sex when you want it or you not doing sex either?
grkBoy Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 It sounds like the "being alone" thing is the "going your own way" thing, like MGTOW. Nothing wrong with it. I think it's great for men and women, especially those unlucky in love, to take time away from the pool to find themselves. To grow, to do things, to live life. No need to defend things, and forget those who say you'll miss having someone. If you live a full life and especially take solace in your family and friends, then you can live alone. You might meet someone, but you'll want to date and get into a RL on your own terms.
Zulnex Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 In my case, for now I am content being alone. Had a lot of issues losing jobs in the past (companies closing and shortages of work). I am currently focusing on my career. As a matter of fact, I have been alone all my life due to shyness and social anxiety (seeing a counselor soon).
Green Light Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 If you are lonely go out and meet some people! Alone time is wonderful because it lets you spend time with your favorite person in the world. Yourself! I'm working on it.
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 Yep I am actually my favorite person to spend time with I also prefer having "distant friends", friends you can hang out with once a month or something and do social things. Anything more than that is too much for me. I am forced to see my co-workers all the time though. I see my family once a fortnight. All of them really want more of my time. But I manage to keep them at an arms length yet still in my life
KatZee Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 I'm 11 months out of my breakup and the single life gets better and better every single day. I was dabbling with the idea of getting back into dating, but I actually just found another interest to add to my ever growing list of stuff to do and... sorry to say, dating has taken a backseat yet again. And I'm not sorry. Relationships? Ain't nobody got time for that! 1
todreaminblue Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 i am like red robin not fond of the early dating phase wouldl rather know some one and go straight to relationship ...which basically happens anyway....as i have dated in the friendly pool ...dating to me is an exclusive relationship i dont multi date and i differentiate male friends from love interests..... and i invest time getting to know someone....probably why old didnt work for me...i am better going friends first...old isnt friends first savvy.......its more wanna coffee let me feel you up lets have sex...end of date...not my style......boring.......getting to kno0w someone...what they like what they dont takes time and effort......i am much more comfortable knowing someone so i can just be me......i am a little shy to begin with when i actually care....deb
TheBladeRunner Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 I am good alone, I have nobody to answer to, and I can pretty much do what I want when I want. "I have dozens of friends and the fun never ends, that's as long as I'm buying":D The friends I have reconnected with have been great and even the time by myself is used pretty well.......but I do get lonely. I myself miss the companionship of a woman and I don't even wanna' talk about the physical aspects of a relationship as I miss that most. Even with the occasional loneliness, I would rather stay alone than put up with a bunch of BS. At this stage of my game I have opted to start dating again, but just dating. What I am really looking for is someone that we can share some simple, mutual respect, dinner, good times, conversation, and some sex would be nice. I am not looking to rescue anyone, pay their bills, or raise their kids; I have a child of my own and I don't need anyone raising my kid nor would I expect it. Finding someone that doesn't want to hop into a "hard-core" relationship has been challenging.
40 Fonzarelli Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 Its usually after boredom sets in when I want to be single again. They each have their pros and cons but I think humans were meant to have a companion. Not just friends. Ive been single for a little over a year and i'm tired of the bar/club scene. I'd much rather dine out and watch a movie.
ltjg45 Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 I would be happy being single if I was actually alone. Living with my mother and my 2 brothers? Hell on Earth.
clia Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 I would be happy being single if I was actually alone. Living with my mother and my 2 brothers? Hell on Earth. You're 26. Move out.
ltjg45 Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 You're 26. Move out. I need to find a job first. That is still a painful and lose process. Trust me: I would LOVE to move out.
carhill Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 I lived alone for about 15 years prior to M and now for about 3 years post-D. If I had to provide a balanced assessment, I'd opine I'm a bit less 'inspired' then when in love and married but, overall, happy and content. One life, one marriage. I will state that I'm a lot happier now than when I lived alone prior to being married. Being married caused me to more greatly value the benefits of being alone, something I had given little thought to prior. That said, overall, I found marriage to be a positive experience. I liked how it really pushed boundaries and fostered growth. 1
BitterSweet2k Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 Love is goofy and destructive in the hands of people who don't have the experience and awareness to see it for what it is. I really don't understand that last part. Can you elaborate?
RedRobin Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 @RedRobbin Thank you for the reply. When you say pace your self are you referring the the speed at which the relationship progresses? I generally don't move slow when I am wooing a women as I enjoy sex very much as a consequence of that feelings are never far behind. Anyone close to me knows that i am a very flexible person when it comes to relationships. I dont require things to always be on my terms as I was raised to always have empathy for others and to always take others into consideration. Maybe one day ill find one of those girls you speak of. But i wont hold my breath. There are plenty out there... Thing is, perhaps they are more comfortable in their own skin and may or may not be jumping into the sack immediately or as quick as you'd like. If you say you enjoy your alone time so much, then you can afford to take more time to get to know someone rather than going all balls-to-the-wall and taking the sex first approach and then 'hoping' they will share your values and pace later on. A lot of women complain about men who come on strong in the beginning and then get 'lazy' later. I won't necessarily call it 'lazy' (well, not on this thread and not today, ha ha)... but you may be having the unintended effect of misrepresenting yourself if you are pouring on the attention then retreating into your cave once you get steady sex. That's not fair and it doesn't really represent who you really are, sounds like. So yea... give the other person and yourself a chance to get to know each other a bit. You may find yourself not getting so burnt out. 1
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