jags2bowl27 Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 Hey everyone, was hoping to get someone's opinion on this: I have been talking to a girl over the internet which is really weird by the way and she is very goal orientated just like me. we exchanged a few emails and I asked if she wanted to meet but she had some friends coming into town. She wanted to meet this past weekend but I was going out of town so we scheduled something for this Wed. (its been about 2 weeks since we had a flow of messages back and forth). The thing im not really concerned about.. just wondering. When I first asked I gave her my number just to get her off the website and talking via phone... didnt work, she used the website to respond. I like the phone, I really dont even like text so it has me thinking... is she just protecting herself. She does say she is shy before she gets to know someone.... What do you guys think. I see her online at least once a day so I know she obviously is talking to other people... but thats just a dating site right lol. I can only imagine how many people hit up these girls. But she actively wanted to meet and scheduled a time with me.. going to get some dinner. What do you guys think. Also.. do you think I should be still talking to her leading up to the date... ask her how her weekend went or just save it all for the date.
soccerrprp Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 If she calls you then she will reveal her number to you. If she is that cautious, then that's understandable. She may be gauging things, so not sure about giving away her number. Sure, why not ask her how her weekend went? Nothing wrong with that. I don't know about you, but my policy is always to speak to the person before meeting. I've never had any lady reject that. At least to finalize the date the day/evening before. Good luck. 2
MarinaX Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 I think as girls, we have this idea that we have to protect ourselves a little when it comes to the online dating realm. I'd say that I would probably not want to give out my number too fast...even if it's been two weeks. She may have had a bad experience in the past? I say she is protecting herself but don't get too defensive or worried about it yet. Arrange a time and place to meet and likely when she sees you face-to-face, she'll be more comfortable sharing her number and calling you after that if you guys hit it off. If she has a smart phone that she can access her emails easily on, she likely sees no reason to give out a number just yet and you should do the same too! Take the same precautions 1
Treasa Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 I'll give out my number after a few days of talking to someone. However, my voice mail is as follows (and is completely truthful): "Hi, this is Treasa. Most of my friends are black belts and are kinda protective of me, and I'm trained in martial arts and weapons, have no shortage of them around the house, and I can go from sane to bat**** insane within two seconds. Have a nice day!" 2
soccerrprp Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 I'll give out my number after a few days of talking to someone. However, my voice mail is as follows (and is completely truthful): "Hi, this is Treasa. Most of my friends are black belts and are kinda protective of me, and I'm trained in martial arts and weapons, have no shortage of them around the house, and I can go from sane to bat**** insane within two seconds. Have a nice day!" LOL!!!!!!!!!!! You're some lady! 1
Cutiepie1976 Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 Women tend to be somewhat more safety conscious than guys, and for some reason, more so online than meeting a stranger elsewhere. You want her to feel at ease with you, rather than develop misgivings because she feels you're pressuring her to do things she's not yet ready to do. When she calls or texts, you'll have her number, so I would just be patient on that specific issue. Focus instead on getting to a date...without delay. One thing I learned quickly with online dating was to meet as soon as possible. Emailing, texting, etc. won't give you a true sense of the person. It's almost impossible to tell who the person really is and if you'll "click" with your date before an in-person meeting. In a few cases, I had the date the same day or the day after the guy contacted me. Just depended on our schedules and when we had a chance to speak by phone beforehand. I do think you should have her number before you actually meet. You need to have some way of communicating before the date--suppose you have difficulty finding the meeting spot, etc. 1
Author jags2bowl27 Posted March 25, 2013 Author Posted March 25, 2013 Women tend to be somewhat more safety conscious than guys, and for some reason, more so online than meeting a stranger elsewhere. You want her to feel at ease with you, rather than develop misgivings because she feels you're pressuring her to do things she's not yet ready to do. When she calls or texts, you'll have her number, so I would just be patient on that specific issue. Focus instead on getting to a date...without delay. One thing I learned quickly with online dating was to meet as soon as possible. Emailing, texting, etc. won't give you a true sense of the person. It's almost impossible to tell who the person really is and if you'll "click" with your date before an in-person meeting. In a few cases, I had the date the same day or the day after the guy contacted me. Just depended on our schedules and when we had a chance to speak by phone beforehand. I do think you should have her number before you actually meet. You need to have some way of communicating before the date--suppose you have difficulty finding the meeting spot, etc. exactly. I think im going to just write her the night before and give it to her again just in case. I do think it is strange we have not spoken before we are meeting... but maybe like you said she is just protecting herself? She has a lot going for her it seems so we will see... just not used to these blind dates lol
Cutiepie1976 Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 Not everyone feels a need to speak on the phone beforehand. I do because I find it to be a very effective screening tool. But to each his own. The night before, when you confirm the date, ask for her number directly. I wouldn't give her yours again, hoping she reciprocates. She probably won't. Instead point out that she has had yours for some time, and to be fair, you'd like to have hers in case either of you needs to communicate leading up to the date.
Author jags2bowl27 Posted March 26, 2013 Author Posted March 26, 2013 Not everyone feels a need to speak on the phone beforehand. I do because I find it to be a very effective screening tool. But to each his own. The night before, when you confirm the date, ask for her number directly. I wouldn't give her yours again, hoping she reciprocates. She probably won't. Instead point out that she has had yours for some time, and to be fair, you'd like to have hers in case either of you needs to communicate leading up to the date. I dont know if that is the smartest idea... I really dont think it is a big deal, rather get her number in person anyways. Just thought it was weird she was using the site to communicate rather than a phone lol
KatZee Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 I personally don't give out my number to every Tom, Dick and Harry. Especially if I don't even know you. If we meet and I like what I see and we click, then you can have my number. But I see all my poor friends being so screwed because they've jumped the gun and have given out their number only to have these people continuously try to get in contact.
Author jags2bowl27 Posted March 28, 2013 Author Posted March 28, 2013 date went well, turns out she didnt give her number to me because she did it with a few other guys and they started sending her images and stuff. I got the digits tonight and it went as well as it could between two people that dont know anything about one another.
Cutiepie1976 Posted March 28, 2013 Posted March 28, 2013 Fantastic! I guess personally, I'd prefer to know we had different goals (from those images) and not waste my time going on a date with those guys. To each his own.
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