xbabycakes Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 Hi five weeks ago my bf split up with me (read other threads for more detailed info) and im missing him so, so badly. It started off with him just saying 'we are rowing too much, I want a two week break , just some time for myself' but we've had hiccups like this before and a few days later he would come running back, but after a while I hadnt heard much & I couldn't stop myself and contacted him anyway and after a bit of pressure from my side he got agitated & said he didnt want to get back together and wanted to be alone. Since then hes contacted me and we have met a few times and gone on dates etc and when ive asked whats going on he says 'were starting again, just taking things slow' but its so hard from living together from barely seeing each other. And in the past 2 weeks hes texted and spoke to me everyday but not arranged too meet (though he works 6am - 7pm so i feel that is making it worse) But im just sitting at home 24/7 missing him like crazy and trying not to contact him. I cant bring myself to go out or eat because how bad the emotional & physical pain is, i went to my friends last night and while they were all laughing away I was sitting there like a zombie in my own world and i couldn't snap out of it. I think i suffer from some sort of OCD as in the last 7/8 years I have always over-analysed and obsessed over absolutely everything and every detail of anything at all and i will sit for hours going over details in my head and not being able to settle even if the matter is very trivial.. so this is just driving my head feeling like its going to explode.. i honestly feel like killing myself if it wasn't for my mum because that would destroy her. and the thought of him eventually being with another girl feels like it will push me over the edge, he was my first everything and this is destroyed my life..please help.. and i also am having severe regret about starting the row that caused him to finish us, just wishing i could turn back time and keep my mouth shut!! and i dream about us getting back together and wake up even worse
Mack05 Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 and i also am having severe regret about starting the row that caused him to finish us, just wishing i could turn back time and keep my mouth shut!! and i dream about us getting back together and wake up even worse Just say you both got back together, do you have any idea how hard it is to watch every little thing you say, in fear of upsetting your partner? This relationship can never work. You just don't understand why. I would recommend therapy. I honestly believe no one on this site can help you. Why? cause you could receive the greatest advice in the world and it won't make a difference. The problem here is, because you are so emotional right now you are simply incapable of truly absorbing exactly what is being said to you. In a few weeks it's going to be a new thread with the same misery. You have to want to help yourself. The best way to help yourself, is get yourself into therapy.
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