mimi_88 Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 What do i do? I have been with my bf now for 6 months, because i have been thinking about the whole love issue, i realised that i really do love him. So last night, i said the 3 magic words to him, knowing that he might not say it back, seeing as he did tell me that he never loved before, but i did have some hopes, as we function perfectly together...(hes 26, and hes longest relationship so far was 6 months) He didn't say it back, he told me that means a lot to him, and just held me. I got a tinsy bit pissed off, as its only human if someone rejects you, not blantantly but still... He told me that he cares a lot 4 me, and that hes never been sooo relaxed with a girl before, that hes never had that before in a relationship, not having no doubts. He also told me, that it would be dishonest of him to say it right back, just for the sake of it, and that if he said it first, he wouldn't at all expect me to say it, and wouldnt regard it is as honest. He said that i mean that much more to him because i feel that way about him, but hes just not there yet. I don't know what to think, i feel let down, like im hanging on the line now, waiting for him to say it, and i know the more i wait the more im going to pull away. I really do love him and am willing to wait, but how long is too long to be put out there on the line???
soccerrprp Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 (edited) I told my late wife that I loved her after 2-weeks of dating! Yikes, right? Most would say that that is WAAAAY too early and likely was not love. I married her 9-months after and married for 12+ years. Everyone is different. The question is not when should he/she say I love you, the question is how long are YOU willing to wait for it, if it ever happens? I hope he says it soon. Good luck! Edited March 24, 2013 by soccerrprp 1
lovelyde Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Contrary to what others tell you, true love is right away. He should be showing interest right away and you should be able to feel his intertwining emotions with yours. Of course, in your case, it's not romantic. It's not love at first sight. So why are you still with him? To validate your self worth? To be of use to him? To fit into a movie-like storyline? He must be enamoured with you upon first sight. Which he obviously isn't. You're just a booty call for him until the right girl comes around. But he'll never tell you that because he's keeping you around to bang. Men can become passionate, clingy and make deep love with you. You just gotta find him. First of all, dump this guy immediately as he's just using you to get his rocks off. He may love and care for you but he's not "taken (meaning hopelessly in love)" by you. Of course he will never tell you that he's just using you to get his rocks off, because if you knew you'd dump him and f-ck a better guy (in his mind). And you can never become the right girl for this tricky sleezeball either. It's either there or it's not upon first sight.
FitChick Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 You created this problem yourself, knowing what might happen. Do you often sabotage your relationships? I always wait for the man to say it first.
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