calgary Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 she says she suffers from anxiety.. it's hard to get her to make a coffee because she's scared I won't like it and drink it out of politeness.. it's like if I talk to her online.. she just answers my questions.. she writes a lot in response... she told me she rarely starts conversations. although she has with me a few times, she jokingly told me to feel privileged. as soon as I type anything she responds immediately and a lot.. but it's never anything for me to answer.. if I reply with ' that's cool' and purposely kill the conversation she'll put 'yeah' and then two minutes later if I haven't written anything she'll put a smiley face . it's like she wants me to keep talking to her.. but she's really awkward. I don't know if she actually likes me.. it seems like she does. i'm meeting up with her and her friends next week for drinks. we spoke online until 4am. I hung out with her last weekend at a friends. she just seems ridiculously shy. . i'm getting mixed vibes as to whether she likes me or not.. i'm not usually one to chase... she told me she's never been taken out for dinner by a guy or really had the money to do things like that when she was in her previous relationship. she hinted that she'd like to.. but I was talking to her online and it didn't seem right i'd rather ask her face to face I think, not even sure if she'd want to go with me.. just wondered if anyone had any feedback ? I've totally lost my way with girls i'm clueless at picking up on things. let me know if it sounds positive or negative with this girl please ! thanks
SJC2008 Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Many people are like this, it's not a gender specific issue either. I'm used to it already. If I wait for someone who's gonna ask questions I'll die alone.
january2011 Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Some people take some time to open up to people they don't know that well. If you wish to pursue something with her then you're going to have to be patient and remain consistent in your pursuit. If it sounds like too much effort and you'd rather be with someone is more communicative, then perhaps this is not the girl for you. 1
SJC2008 Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Some people take some time to open up to people they don't know that well. If you wish to pursue something with her then you're going to have to be patient and remain consistent in your pursuit. If it sounds like too much effort and you'd rather be with someone is more communicative, then perhaps this is not the girl for you. Good point but getting to know you dialogue is not about opening up. The woman I'm talking to is the same (see my above post lol). I mean if I can ask her if she likes theme parks, what does she like to drink when she goes out etc why can't she ask something?
Author calgary Posted March 24, 2013 Author Posted March 24, 2013 Some people take some time to open up to people they don't know that well. If you wish to pursue something with her then you're going to have to be patient and remain consistent in your pursuit. If it sounds like too much effort and you'd rather be with someone is more communicative, then perhaps this is not the girl for you. I enjoy talking to her. I just don't want to keep making an effort with her if she's not interested! or if she eventually decides she likes somebody else or something. I also don't want to look like i'm harassing her.. sometimes it feels like she's just been polite replying. it's just weird when you feel like you have to make all the effort even though she wants you to continue talking etc.
Author calgary Posted March 24, 2013 Author Posted March 24, 2013 Good point but getting to know you dialogue is not about opening up. The woman I'm talking to is the same (see my above post lol). I mean if I can ask her if she likes theme parks, what does she like to drink when she goes out etc why can't she ask something? yea completely agree. it's like they're not interested in anything but themselves and talking about themselves.. and that to me makes me think they're not interested in me what so ever because they're more interested in themselves.
Terminal-Ice Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 I don't ask a lot of questions. I give answers with the hope that something will prompt you to share your opinion. If you're really interested in what I'm saying, you'll do this naturally. If you have to wait for a direct question, then you should consider your own communication style first. You either have something to say, or you don't. Personally, I like people who don't need me to guide them through a conversation. It isn't an interview. It's a conversation.
dasein Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Please consider only phone and in person to talk to new people before asking out, get her phone number, -call- her, and ask her out for a specific date. Good luck.
Terminal-Ice Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Case in point: there are eight posts in this thread, but only two questions (now there are nine posts). Most of us didn't need a direct question to prompt us to share our opinion.
Mr_hopeless Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 she says she suffers from anxiety.. it's hard to get her to make a coffee because she's scared I won't like it and drink it out of politeness.. it's like if I talk to her online.. she just answers my questions.. she writes a lot in response... she told me she rarely starts conversations. although she has with me a few times, she jokingly told me to feel privileged. as soon as I type anything she responds immediately and a lot.. but it's never anything for me to answer.. if I reply with ' that's cool' and purposely kill the conversation she'll put 'yeah' and then two minutes later if I haven't written anything she'll put a smiley face . it's like she wants me to keep talking to her.. but she's really awkward. I don't know if she actually likes me.. it seems like she does. i'm meeting up with her and her friends next week for drinks. we spoke online until 4am. I hung out with her last weekend at a friends. she just seems ridiculously shy. . i'm getting mixed vibes as to whether she likes me or not.. i'm not usually one to chase... she told me she's never been taken out for dinner by a guy or really had the money to do things like that when she was in her previous relationship. she hinted that she'd like to.. but I was talking to her online and it didn't seem right i'd rather ask her face to face I think, not even sure if she'd want to go with me.. just wondered if anyone had any feedback ? I've totally lost my way with girls i'm clueless at picking up on things. let me know if it sounds positive or negative with this girl please ! thanks I can't stand it when girls do this. I understand they might be shy, but not shy enough to not ask questions, surely. It makes you wonder how they get into previous relationships and whether it ends because of that exact reason/problem. At times, It feels like we have to do everything when it comes to dating...
Author calgary Posted March 25, 2013 Author Posted March 25, 2013 i'm actually sure i'm getting friendzoned here though. she called me dude. that's never been a good sign in the passed ? maybe i'm looking into things too much but usually that means i'm seen as a friend right ?
Author calgary Posted March 25, 2013 Author Posted March 25, 2013 she just asked if i'd like to go with her for drinks on Saturday night and we'll meet her friends later in the night. it was sort of out of the blue. it feels like a good sign but I don't want to get my hopes up. I guess it could mean anything at this stage. 1
SJC2008 Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 I don't ask a lot of questions. I give answers with the hope that something will prompt you to share your opinion. If you're really interested in what I'm saying, you'll do this naturally. If you have to wait for a direct question, then you should consider your own communication style first. You either have something to say, or you don't. Personally, I like people who don't need me to guide them through a conversation. It isn't an interview. It's a conversation. When you're conversing with someone online or via text and they don't ask questions back is when it's an interview. I don't think you see where we're coming from.
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