Dazed_Confused1989 Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Hi all. I've gone out for coffee with this girl twice, the first time we chatted for 5 hours. Yes. We have a lot of things in common, a lot smiling, etc. We initially met up because we were in the same field - but even after the first meeting, I did feel a connection. We went out again this evening for 3 hours-ish. It was great! She's been pretty quick with her goodbyes however. I also know she is single because she brought it up briefly. I'm getting a lot of good signals, but need advice on how to convey the message as a more than friends date without making things weird. Should I simply ask her? Should I practice more kino?
SJC2008 Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Dam I was ready to say something but then I read it's one of those are these dates scenarios! I'd take the hint at being single as a good sign. I say bite the bullet and just say it. "Hey I enjoyed your company when we had coffee, let's do something more on a date and take it from there". It's either that or stick around in are these dates? land:(
Author Dazed_Confused1989 Posted March 24, 2013 Author Posted March 24, 2013 Dam I was ready to say something but then I read it's one of those are these dates scenarios! I'd take the hint at being single as a good sign. I say bite the bullet and just say it. "Hey I enjoyed your company when we had coffee, let's do something more on a date and take it from there". It's either that or stick around in are these dates? land:( Yeah. It's tough. Are these dates? They definitely, in any other context felt like them. I was thinking of asking her something along the lines of a "I felt a good connection, you're a kind and beautiful woman, I wanted to know how you felt about me" question.
kassy Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Hum... Sounds like dates to me. I wouldn't phrase it that way, I mean it comes as a bit of a shock and what do you say... I'd mess it up if I liked him and say... Yeah.. Um .. You seem nice. And if I wasn't interested in you and I was put on the spot but liked you... It would probably be almost the same. Why not just invite her out on a date... Not sure how you are organizing these dates but however it is (let's assume email just because) say something like "I'd like to do something fun on our next date, how about we go ice skating/ whatever cheesy date activity you like doing? (Maybe give her a couple of options) and say does any of that sound good to you?" Even on a phone call its easier to let someone down than when you are put on the spot. But also using the word date makes it clear what you think is happening and she has the opportunity to jump up and down with joy or correct you.
Archgirl Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 Yeah don't bring it up, it's awkward and pretty unappealing from the female perspective. Ask her out for another coffee, bring up movies that are playing then a few days later invite her to see one of them and don't let her pay. This is charming and clearly signals that you want to date her without betraying any lack of confidence. Plus movies are good for snuggling in the dark
Author Dazed_Confused1989 Posted March 24, 2013 Author Posted March 24, 2013 say something like "I'd like to do something fun on our next date, how about we go ice skating/ whatever cheesy date activity you like doing? (Maybe give her a couple of options) and say does any of that sound good to you?" Thanks for the idea. I agree, the last thing I want to do is put someone on the spot. At the same time, I'm apprehensive about referring to it as a "date"...especially because even though I've got a few signals (my interpretation), it's been fairly platonic.
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