itselemental Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 the love of my life (together 2.5 years) broke up with me yesterday based on fears that he has about the relationship. He said it is easier to throw in the towel than it is to work on it with me. Just 3 days ago we were talking about forever with each other, and how far we have come together (side note: we are both recovering alcoholics and dealt with a number of lies and mistrust issues (his not trusting me) he has"broken up" about a dozen times before, usually getting pretty verbally abusive towards me, and then we talk a few days later and get back together) In the past there have been things that I have done that have triggered his anger towards me, but not this time. I have been completely open and honest with him. I have given him my heart like I have never done with anyone and now I am reeling in so much pain and confusion from this. He said he left town to get as far away form me as possible. I don't understand. I need help getting through this. Do I walk away once and for all?
lovelyde Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 Honey, please listen to me okay? The man who secretly loves you is scaring this good-for-nothing jacka*s away from you so he can harm you no more. This man, you also love. This man, you also admire. The man who secretly loves you is observing you. And you have been observing him from time to time as you are curious about his developments. However, since you see him with another woman, you think he's interested in her. It is only an act on his part to see how you're going to react. In your usual charming manner, as you always are with the man you secretly admire, as you love him your charm when approaching him comes naturally and you feel like you can poke fun at each other. You love it. He loves it. Soon enough he'll get hot over you. Who is the fun-loving man you love and want to be around in the future regardless of situation? This man, it's almost like a dream.. for him to visit and caress you. Perhaps he has purposely visited you in your dreams to let you know that he loves and adores you as normally he's shy in front of you, shy to approach and ask you out for romance. If you could have things your way, he'd be your "soulmate" in life. Do you want to know the truth? He is your "soulmate". -
Chris516 Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 the love of my life (together 2.5 years) broke up with me yesterday based on fears that he has about the relationship. He said it is easier to throw in the towel than it is to work on it with me. Just 3 days ago we were talking about forever with each other, and how far we have come together (side note: we are both recovering alcoholics and dealt with a number of lies and mistrust issues (his not trusting me) he has"broken up" about a dozen times before, usually getting pretty verbally abusive towards me, and then we talk a few days later and get back together) In the past there have been things that I have done that have triggered his anger towards me, but not this time. I have been completely open and honest with him. I have given him my heart like I have never done with anyone and now I am reeling in so much pain and confusion from this. He said he left town to get as far away form me as possible. I don't understand. I need help getting through this. Do I walk away once and for all? I am sort of going through that right now, too. My fiance of 5.666yrs. recently told me, she can't give me what I want, she said I should see someone else. When two months after we started dating nearly six years ago, she was begging me to move out to where she lives. She hasn't been very good about communication for the last year. She hasn't said outright, she wants to breakup. But if she did, she wouldn't get to see the IM conversations I have. Because she was jealous of my (ex)fiance, and jealous of an online friend. If she had communicated more, she wouldn't be jealous. So I feel like I am in a daze and can't think straight.
TaraMaiden Posted March 26, 2013 Posted March 26, 2013 the love of my life (together 2.5 years) broke up with me yesterday based on fears that he has about the relationship. He said it is easier to throw in the towel than it is to work on it with me. Just 3 days ago we were talking about forever with each other, and how far we have come together (side note: we are both recovering alcoholics and dealt with a number of lies and mistrust issues (his not trusting me) he has"broken up" about a dozen times before, usually getting pretty verbally abusive towards me, and then we talk a few days later and get back together) In the past there have been things that I have done that have triggered his anger towards me, but not this time. I have been completely open and honest with him. I have given him my heart like I have never done with anyone and now I am reeling in so much pain and confusion from this. He said he left town to get as far away form me as possible. I don't understand. I need help getting through this. Do I walk away once and for all? I see a guy who has thrived on the dysfunction of you both being "broken" I see you (personally) have made progress, improved and move onwards by leaps and bounds. I see you are being open, honest and laying bare your genuine heart which for too long has lain hidden under baggage, addictions toxic behaviour and co-dependency. I see him now scared of facing something which is now normal and good, having been used for so long to dealing with upheaval, imbalance and aggression. And I see him incapable of adjusting. I would say - although you will not believe this now, and maybe even won't for a long time) - he has done you an enormous favour. Because this relationship did not begin on the best of footings, and even though it seems from your first post that you have been addressing, facing and confronting those issues - you may not both have done so to the same level, degree, depth or speed. He's leaving you behind - because actually - You've left him behind. And he can't reconcile his future with yours, because he can't keep up with you. This is all complete hypothesis on my part. But I think it's a fair theory.....
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