JackieChiles Posted March 23, 2013 Posted March 23, 2013 (edited) Is it appropriate? I still have friends at the company that I work at, and I still worry about my professionalism. I do not have her number, but I have access to it (I still have the staff phone number list). The afternoon before my last day on the job, I was pretty much told by another co-worker that this girl likes me. Never really had a chance to go up to her and get her number, and I didn't really worry about it because honestly, I never thought about her that way until I was told that I should ask her out, so I just didn't pursue it and brushed it off. We work in different fields with different schedules and there are always people around, so if we were to see each other at work it would be at random and bad times. On my last day, I didn't see her right until I left (and she was with other people) and I had to rush out. After I quickly left, I heard her make a joke about how I didn't ask her out (just her brushing it off, really). Anyways, for those reasons and couple others, I didn't ask her out. I guess I just didn't think much of it. She was the one that was interested, not so much me. But now I'm thinking that maybe I should have asked her out, and am thinking that I should just give her a call. She's a pretty girl and was always cool when I talked to her (a handful of times, at most). But like I said, I still have friends/acquaintances at the company, and I still want to maintain some level of professionalism. I don't think I'd ever date a co-worker, and even though I was leaving, it still would feel weird I think since I come in contact and text many of the workers there still, and I don't know if I would want them involved. So, I guess my questions are, would it be unprofessional to call her? And would it be more unprofessional/weird to call her by getting her number off of the work contact list? This isn't a scenario of me not having the courage to talk to her, but more of making up for a missed opportunity and not having an understanding of what is appropriate or not. Any feedback would be appreciated. Thanks! Edited March 23, 2013 by JackieChiles
ja123 Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 I think it might depend on your field, the size of your town, etc. If you've a lot of latitude with professioanl options, then you'll make new contacts, etc, if things weren't to work out with the girl and she trash talked about you afterwards. If you're cool with the possible repercussions, then call her.
Author JackieChiles Posted March 24, 2013 Author Posted March 24, 2013 (edited) I think it might depend on your field, the size of your town, etc. If you've a lot of latitude with professioanl options, then you'll make new contacts, etc, if things weren't to work out with the girl and she trash talked about you afterwards. If you're cool with the possible repercussions, then call her. Thanks man, appreciate the response. I don't think I'm going to go this route, but I do have another idea. I live in a big city, and I will be fine. Not worried about the professional options, I'm just a professional at heart. Not worried about trash talk. Thanks again. I think I'm going to text one of my friends at work who I trust for some advice on this. Edited March 24, 2013 by JackieChiles
CC12 Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 (edited) I think I'm going to text one of my friends at work who I trust for some advice on this. Is this friend someone you currently work with, or someone at your old job? Either way, I don't think you should do this. If you're concerned about keeping things professional, asking them for advice on your dating life is not very appropriate. What would you ask them, specifically? And if it's someone at your old job, I would say absolutely don't involve them. Keep in mind that she still works with these people, and might not appreciate you sharing this with them. What if word got out and they started gossiping about it and making it awkward for her? That's not going to get you off to a good start with her. She might not care if they all know, but leave it up to her to share that information. Forgot to add: Yeah, just ask her out. It's really not that unusual for even current coworkers to date each other. You're not even coworkers anymore. Unless your profession is some sort of weird, dysfunctional clique, I doubt anyone would care beyond maybe some lunchroom gossip. And I don't think it's all that weird to get her phone number off of the company contacts list. But if you're worried about it seeming creepy, what about emailing her to ask for her number? Edited March 24, 2013 by CC12
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