Jeremyh55 Posted March 23, 2013 Posted March 23, 2013 Hey everyone, there was this girl that i loved, we dated for a year and a half. She was everything to me and i cared for her more than anything. Last month she broke up with me and i dont know what to do. I tried EVERYTHING to get her back, love notes, gifts, etc. she literally broke up with me for no reason (im serious!!) i kept trying and trying to get her back but it only made things worse. She totally hates me and wants nothing to do with me. What should i do?
ThatJustHappened Posted March 23, 2013 Posted March 23, 2013 Nothing. She doesn't want you back. Drop it and move on.
NewPerspective93 Posted March 23, 2013 Posted March 23, 2013 I think you made a mistake with the pleading for her attention and her involvement in a relationship she didn't want to be in anymore. I'm sorry to say it like this, but I think that's where you went wrong. Love notes and gifts will not convince her to come back to you. Harsh of reality. If she didn't give you a reason, why pursue the relationship? It seems that she might not know what she wants, maybe she just wanted to explore the other side of the grass, if you get what I mean. You need to give the other party space, not constantly contact them. You did the exact opposite, which annoyed her. When the other party doesn't want to contact, give them space. Your best option is to move on, and let her go. I know it will be hard, but you'll be that much stronger in the end. Take it from me. You might not hear the posts that advice moving on, but you NEED to move on from this. If it helps, post your thoughts here rather than contacting her directly. Like you said, she's tired of your contact, so let it be and move on with your life. You'll be better. I feel you on this one, but you have to move on for your sake. Take up a hobby, a sport, or SOMETHING that will not give you time to think about it. Give yourself some time to think about things and to just move on. Cheers. 2
Kaiten Posted March 23, 2013 Posted March 23, 2013 Hey OP this is the EXACT same situation i find myself in as we speak. It hurts. She literally told me she didnt need a reason to break up with me. That hurt a lot. As a man, I felt like i deserved to know. So i bothered her for a week until she told me. At first i gave her gifts in an attempt to reconcile. I did everything a man could do. It all seem to make her defenses rise. In fact, i would have to say I felt better about having a chance to reconcile before i did anything to try to speed the process. Now i feel that there is no chance. Im sorry to say this, but i think it may be the same for you. 1
Kaiten Posted March 23, 2013 Posted March 23, 2013 BUT i am a man who never gives up hope until the bitter end! I'll admit that it is unrealistic to think we could ever get back together. But i cant give up. And i know that if we dont get back together then my hanging on to hope will only make it hurt worse, but I am prepared to face that pain.
Damsel in Distress Posted March 23, 2013 Posted March 23, 2013 Jeremy, there is nothing you can do to influence her feelings and make her want to be with you again. It sucks big-time to feel so helpless and powerless. I am in the same position myself. The most important thing you can do right now, the only thing you can do, is to focus on healing yourself - you are no good to anybody, not even yourself, with a broken heart and soul. I would recommend boxing up all the souvenirs and reminders, don't contact her in any way, shape, or form - it only makes the pain and heartbreak stronger, and as you found out, it only makes her more annoyed with you. Then focus on your life - tackle projects you've put off, things you've wanted to do, do something noble like go volunteer somewhere. You are broken and torn down right now and you have to build yourself back up. I'm 5 weeks into my breakup and still a raw emotional roller coaster. But during the hours where I'm feeling strong and focused on rebuilding myself, I keep thinking I need to do something noble ... and the example that comes to my mind is to build an orphanage! lol It's a silly thought, but still the concept of helping others and I think can take your focus away from your own pain and thoughts and turn it to the outside, which is a good thing in this situation. Hang in there. I know how difficult it is to accept that the relationship is over. I haven't accepted it either. I'm not yet able to give up hope, but I know I have to start living my life as if he will never come back. And I have to start building myself back up. If I let myself remain broken I won't be capable of having a relationship with anybody (including the ex if he were to come back). Stay strong and take care of yourself, Jeremy. 1
Author Jeremyh55 Posted March 23, 2013 Author Posted March 23, 2013 Yeah i know..love makes you do some crazy things sometimes. Everyone (family,friends,etc) are telling me to move on. I know i have to but its hard to let her go, she was amazing, sweet, and beautiful. 1
Author Jeremyh55 Posted March 23, 2013 Author Posted March 23, 2013 "Away from me" by puddle of mudd. Perfect song for my situation
Recommended Posts