Compromize Posted March 22, 2013 Posted March 22, 2013 (edited) It's been 5 weeks since we broke up last, after being together for 6 weeks since the breakup before that. Not all her fault, we just didn't see the same future. Anyway, spoke to her on the phone 4 weeks ago, a couple of text messages from her and to her since that time. No resolution. Her answer was she was not ready to answer. I have been doing my best to stay NC (7 -8? days straight now?), but with the few exceptions it's been LC to NC. I thought the pain would never go away. You all know the feeling. Down to the core, throbbing, aching, "I'm going to die" pain. The funny thing is it's slowly going away. Tonight I have felt the best I have in many weeks. It's like a glimmer of my OLD self is trying to break back through. One thing that has helped tremendously is NO DRINKING. I have made the mistake of drowning my sorrows one too many times and it DOES NOT MAKE ANYTHING BETTER. IT MAKES IT WORSE! I had a great night with my family and my kids. I think I can make it. I miss her but she is not coming back. I will be OK. Anyone else out there finding strength in themselves? It's OK to be alone. It's OK to miss them and think about them but they do not define who we are. Our actions define us and I don't want to be the miserable guy. I WON'T be the miserable guy. I can stand on my own. I need to be happy with myself and that will bring happiness to me and others in the long run. Sorry for the rant, I just wanted to get it out! (steps off soapbox) Have a great night everyone! Edited March 22, 2013 by Compromize 2
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