debbie2004 Posted September 10, 2004 Posted September 10, 2004 My boyfriend has a very annoying habit of talking about other women in front of me, like sharing his lusty thoughts with me. He always says it in a joking manner, and I really do trust him, but it makes me feel so bad and insecure and I don't know how to handle it. I don't know how to bring this up with him without making him feel bad, so I've done some things I'm not very proud of in order to cope with it. Sometimes I pull away from him because I'm mad, like if we're on the phone I'll make an excuse to go. Other times I've made jokes, trying to indirectly let him know that I'm not happy about it. Point is, I've never been direct with him about it because I have no clue how to bring this up with him. I've also tried talking myself out of feeling hurt by this, but the fact of the matter is, it still hurts and I have to try something else. I don't want him to change for me, even to the point that I'd rather break up with him if this is truly part of him. I love him and I want him to be who he is, but I know myself well enough by now to know that this isn't gonna get easier for me. I honestly don't know why he would tell me these things -- is he saying them to make me jealous intentionally? I would never talk about lusting after other men in front of him because I wouldn't want to hurt him and so I just don't see why I would do it. Any advice on how to bring this up with him, without making him feel like a bad person?
lawofopposites Posted September 10, 2004 Posted September 10, 2004 YEAH, do it back, see the reaction. if he doesn't like it then he's doing it to make you jealous. If he doesn't mind, then that's the way he is....honest to a fault and thinking your relationship is so secure he can truley be himself.
tokyo Posted September 10, 2004 Posted September 10, 2004 I actually think your reaction is a bit stupid. Talk to him and that´s it. I don´t think that´s such an important part of his personality, he talks, because he likes talking. You are overreacting. Papi, What´s a mofo?
Papillon Posted September 10, 2004 Posted September 10, 2004 kooky, you're the sweetest, most adorable gal around. A "mofo" is short for "motherf*cker".
tokyo Posted September 10, 2004 Posted September 10, 2004 Oh sh*t.... Don´t forget, English is not my motherlanguage.
Papillon Posted September 10, 2004 Posted September 10, 2004 Not mine, either I'm guessing your ML is Cantonese?
guest Posted September 11, 2004 Posted September 11, 2004 My bf does that sometimes, we would out and he would be a total perv staring at anything that moved with any mile in a horny dog 17 year kind of behavior..totally disgusted me. I can appreciate a good looking woman or men, but hey, I do not act like a horndog around..it is very gross....it actually makes me think that he did not get around enough or have not enough experience..because at our age..30s, he should be acting a bit more mature if he have had a few of those good looking girls! I actually kind of lose respect for him. I am not jealous or anything...it is just gross. checking out good looking people is normal..but there is a line....from 17 to 30.
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