less sexually aggressive men?

[Barnacle-Bob]

I predict your sex life with him:

 

Missionary 90% of the time

Cums < 5 mins

You on top will be his idea of kinky

It will always take place on the bed, in the bedroom.

He wears boxers.

 

Spot. Effing. On.

 

'I'm blushing'? Haha, what the hell? Hey TC, I'm not trying to crack on your man at all, because if he makes you happy, thats all that matters. But seriously, you've got to get this kid kid to start riding his bike without training wheels.

[Emilia]

Your lousy games keep the freaks in and weed out the rest. I got a bright idea. How about I start lying at the rate a woman lies. It would take a lot of effort to keep up, but why not. It would put us on equal footing if I were able to lie that much.

 

Someone would have to care first

[Emilia]

is it wrong that when I read some peoples responses on this thread I either want to tell them to STFU or just strait jack them in the face? I mean honestly, some of the responses to this thread are retarded.

 

no it's exactly how I feel but trying to find the humour somewhere

[Barnacle-Bob]

if people treated relationships like an elaborate five course dinner there would be more happy marriages and the sex would be better. instead it's mcdonalds relationships built on lust.

 

No there wouldn't. Long-term monogamous relationships are not natural, they're stressful, they get boring and trite, and people stay in them out of some goofy combination of fear, dependency and a capitulation to what society has trained us is 'normal' and 'right'.

 

Don't believe me? Do an analysis of all the married couples you know. How many couples are actually happy and love each other? 10% at most?

 

I look at my ex's parents as they archetypical married couple. Together 38 years, go on vacations together, social functions together, church, etc. Two beautiful kids. Nice home. Everybody thinks they have such a great life and relationship.

 

Guess what....they're roommates, and that's all. They friggin hate each other, and at home, where the public can't see them, they fight like middle schoolers. And here's the kicker.....in almost 14 years of being around them CONSTANTLY, I've never even seen them hug each other, much less kiss. Forget about sex. Less than zero intimacy, don't get along, complain about each other non-stop = happy couple?

 

I guarantee when they were dating, my super nice-guy FIL went nice and slow.

[Drseussgrrl]

I'm still trying to make the connection that sexual tension = boning on the first date.

[Emilia]

I'm still trying to make the connection that sexual tension = boning on the first date.

 

That's what I meant in an earlier post, a lot of people (most?) can only think and act in very simple terms.

[Drseussgrrl]

That's what I meant in an earlier post, a lot of people (most?) can only think and act in very simple terms.

 

Even more hilariously - sexual tension leads to divorce and kids being raised by single parents.

[Emilia]

Even more hilariously - sexual tension leads to divorce and kids being raised by single parents.

 

While those that drag their knuckles on the ground stay married and live happily ever after!

[Lonely Ronin]

That's what I meant in an earlier post, a lot of people (most?) can only think and act in very simple terms.

 

 

It's to bad most people don't strive to be more than simpletons.....

[William]

As moderation noted some comments being more about respondents and less about 'less sexually aggressive men', my second appearance here will be to remind members to remain on-topic and conforming to guidelines and that subsequent postings will be assessed individually. Thanks for your participation.

[Lonely Ronin]

My distilled opinion is:

 

You need to be aggressive enough to show definitive interest, while not being so aggressive that's it's off putting. If you can't keep yourself in the massive ocean that is the grey area between these two extremes, then you are going to fail and I have no sympathy for you.

[Emilia]

If you can't keep yourself in the massive ocean that is the grey area between these two extremes,

 

I think also realistically everyone draws the line somewhere so tastes will differ. Shyer women will probably prefer shyer guys - at least while they are young. Each to their own.

 

However bearing the original post and the OP's subsequent posts in mind: there are definitely clashes in expectations, communication style and personality in this case.

[ThaWholigan]

what exactly makes you think this?

T-word, LR, T-word

[Woggle]

in today's world waiting to the second date for a kiss or a few weeks for sex is often deemed not agressive enough.

 

Pretty soon not having sex in the bathroom and waiting until you bring her home will be deemed too timid. If he really desired her he would take her right at the restaurant. In fact forget the bathroom just do it in front of everybody. Now that is animalistic passion.

[StanMusial]

Some people are more traditional or old fashioned in their approach. Would you prefer he adapted to meet the expectation of the over-sexed LS female or should he be himself and perhaps romance another altogether? Stay tuned!

[Woggle]

It just sounds like the OP and him are incompatible. There is no need to tear him apart. Believe me I am not some anti-sex person. I love sex but there is a thing called the numbing point or saturation point and I think our society is starting to come close to it.

[Ruby Slippers]

What I think a lot of women don't consider is that a man who easily makes aggressive moves and moves quickly with you is the kind of guy who can/could do that with other women, too.

 

I think it's very attractive when a man takes his time and makes carefully considered decisions about having sex. This is the kind of guy who, after he's committed to you, will carefully consider temptation when it's presented to him. And he's probably less likely to indulge in it, because he'll take the time to realize why it's a bad idea.

[Ruby Slippers]

It just sounds like the OP and him are incompatible. There is no need to tear him apart. Believe me I am not some anti-sex person. I love sex but there is a thing called the numbing point or saturation point and I think our society is starting to come close to it.

It's getting so ridiculous that I think you have to look at it from a social engineering point of view.

[Woggle]

It's getting so ridiculous that I think you have to look at it from a social engineering point of view.

 

I just think this world is getting ridiculous in general. It's not just sex. I read an article showing pictures of NYC from the 60s and 70s and I really feel I was born in the wrong era. I have been around some stuff that would make a porn star blush and even I wish some romance would come back. You need a balance between that and raw animalistic sexuality.

[Drseussgrrl]

Pretty soon not having sex in the bathroom and waiting until you bring her home will be deemed too timid. If he really desired her he would take her right at the restaurant. In fact forget the bathroom just do it in front of everybody. Now that is animalistic passion.

 

Oh stop it. I'm "blushing".

[Woggle]

Oh stop it. I'm "blushing".

 

It's true though. It seriously would not surprise me in ten years. I have seen it happen in clubs.

[ThaWholigan]

What I think a lot of women don't consider is that a man who easily makes aggressive moves and moves quickly with you is the kind of guy who can/could do that with other women, too.

 

I think it's very attractive when a man takes his time and makes carefully considered decisions about having sex. This is the kind of guy who, after he's committed to you, will carefully consider temptation when it's presented to him. And he's probably less likely to indulge in it, because he'll take the time to realize why it's a bad idea.

That's true, but what I think people are guilty of here is thinking in extremes, which is kind of the point that others are coming too. I certainly understand that a measured approach can indeed be beneficial in many ways, but it is not the only way and it's no more a guarantee to work with every person. It's different shades of grey, the way I see it.

 

Whereas I am measured to a degree, I certainly see the benefit in taking a bolder, direct approach from the outset, if not to get in her panties, simply to demonstrate desire.

[Drseussgrrl]

That's true, but what I think people are guilty of here is thinking in extremes, which is kind of the point that others are coming too. I certainly understand that a measured approach can indeed be beneficial in many ways, but it is not the only way and it's no more a guarantee to work with every person. It's different shades of grey, the way I see it.

 

Whereas I am measured to a degree, I certainly see the benefit in taking a bolder, direct approach from the outset, if not to get in her panties, simply to demonstrate desire.

 

THIS THIS and MORE THIS!

 

I don't want to get banged in the bathroom at dinner - but put your hand on the small of my back as you're guiding me through the door, apologetically. Ooo lah lah!

[SteveC80]

It just sounds like the OP and him are incompatible. There is no need to tear him apart. Believe me I am not some anti-sex person. I love sex but there is a thing called the numbing point or saturation point and I think our society is starting to come close to it.

 

Im all for women not beign shamed for wanting sex and being more sexually free then they used to be but i think its swung way too far in the other direction where women are taught to be overly sexual these days

 

The way i see women act in general and how many times ive had sex on first dates these arent our mothers an grandmothers generation of women

[mn311601]

For all of you women who are saying to put your hand on the small of my back or touch my thigh during a date, there are just as many that would instantly smack the guy and get pissed if he did this, so you can't really win. How are we supposed to know who is okay to do this to and who is not? Just go ahead and do it and hope she is okay with being touched? Seems like a recipe for getting arrested. It reminds me of Louis CK's joke about the girl who wanted him to rape her without telling him about it first, just a terrible idea.