jcrew11 Posted March 22, 2013 Posted March 22, 2013 I disagree a girl withholding sex in order to make sure that the guy isnt only after that. Both, men and women enjoy sex, and when you start withholding it for whatever reason, it becomes a bargaining tool. From bargaining tool, it quickly turns into a weapon as the relationship progresses and is far too often used as a reward/punishment token. This type of approach and withholding sex in general, wrecks many otherwise great relationships. I think she has to realize that Guys are inherently LAZY, so if she is giving up Sex with no effort by the Man, then the Man gets spoiled and will base the relationship only on sex and booty calls whenever he or she is horny. She should try to find something other than Sex to build the relationship around. 1
Author Michelle83 Posted March 22, 2013 Author Posted March 22, 2013 So an update on this... not sure if I handled it correctly.... Today he basically tried to bootycall me. This is the first time he's done it since we started seeing each other again after the break from last summer. He's been really busy with finding a new job so we haven't seen each other much lately...so he started texting and then mentioned getting together soon. I suggested planning a night out next week... and then he suggested coming over right now. I told him I didn't think it would work today and that it felt a bit bootycallish and I didn't want to go down that road again. I said that I really like doing that with him, but don't want that to be all this is about. He replied and said he understood and that he hoped things would settle down with the job hunt. So we'll see. That may just be that and the last time I ever hear from him again. He did keep texting after that. I gave him a few compliments on his...performance...so he knows I still want to, just not in this context. We'll see what happens. Do you think it was right to flat out tell him it felt like a bootycall? That may have embarrassed him a bit and made it awkward. I should have maybe just said no I was busy. I guess at least now that's out in the open though and the question of whether that's all this is will be answered.
Revolver Posted March 24, 2013 Posted March 24, 2013 I think she has to realize that Guys are inherently LAZY, so if she is giving up Sex with no effort by the Man, then the Man gets spoiled and will base the relationship only on sex and booty calls whenever he or she is horny. She should try to find something other than Sex to build the relationship around. If he sees her as a Bootycall from the get go it doesn't Matter how long she waits. There are women who slept with guys on the first date who are married and women who did it "the right way" and waited who ended up being the jump off.
Author Michelle83 Posted March 25, 2013 Author Posted March 25, 2013 If he sees her as a Bootycall from the get go it doesn't Matter how long she waits. There are women who slept with guys on the first date who are married and women who did it "the right way" and waited who ended up being the jump off. Do you think there are specific things that will make the girl more likely to be classified as a booty call? He did text me back yesterday and we made plans to go out and do something, so that's good. Now though it almost kind of feels like I'm making him trade time for sex/making out.
c57dood Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 Do you think there are specific things that will make the girl more likely to be classified as a booty call? He did text me back yesterday and we made plans to go out and do something, so that's good. Now though it almost kind of feels like I'm making him trade time for sex/making out. He's going to do the bare minimum so that it appears that he doesn't just want sex, but if this guy is relatively young every time he thinks of you he thinks sex, and thus it's "I'm horny, and I know a girl who I can get some from." And thus, booty calls galore! I'm guilty of it myself. I did the bare minimum like pretending to date and be "serious" but some girls just give it up way too easily and then they start to regret like you and then because it sounds like he's got some skills he'll start putting on the dinner/date act to keep up his steady supply of sex. The aim is that you either get confused about what the deal is, or you genuinely believe that he wants more. Either way, he's still getting his jollies. 1
lovelyde Posted March 25, 2013 Posted March 25, 2013 Booty call? Anyone other than your "soulmate" is a booty call. 1
Author Michelle83 Posted March 25, 2013 Author Posted March 25, 2013 He's going to do the bare minimum so that it appears that he doesn't just want sex, but if this guy is relatively young every time he thinks of you he thinks sex, and thus it's "I'm horny, and I know a girl who I can get some from." And thus, booty calls galore! I'm guilty of it myself. I did the bare minimum like pretending to date and be "serious" but some girls just give it up way too easily and then they start to regret like you and then because it sounds like he's got some skills he'll start putting on the dinner/date act to keep up his steady supply of sex. The aim is that you either get confused about what the deal is, or you genuinely believe that he wants more. Either way, he's still getting his jollies. Thanks, yeah, that is pretty much how it feels now. We're both right around 30 and he's told me many times he's expressed many times how attracted he is to me, mind you I imagine most guys say that to a girl they want to bed. It sucks, I really liked this one.
Recommended Posts