oldrockingchair Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 My fiancé cheated on me by going to prostitutes for happy endings five times last year. I posted on it a while ago. I wanted it over right when he told me. But he begged and vowed that we could be better. I agreed to try. I am in counseling but I am learning so much about my fears. I love my fiancé but am mostly staying with him because I love the security of a long established relationship. I am afraid to hurt him afraid to be alone. Afraid to make a mistake. Afraid to shake up the semblance of order in my life. I could marry him and be relatively happy. He is a good guy but he threw a wrench in our relationship. Now i will always be wondering if there was something better for me out there. Meanwhile I am finding him more and more unbearable. I do not look forward to sex with him. I am very attracted to someone else and I think about him often. Help. How do I get over my fear of breaking up?
TaserTag Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 It really doesn't sound like you should marry your fiancé, to state the obvious. You can get over your fear of breaking up with him by comparing it to your fears of staying with him. You don't trust him, you're already beginning to find him 'unbearable,' you aren't sexually attracted to him, you are attracted to someone else, and you think there might be someone better for you out there. I would bet that there is someone better for you as well. You shouldn't settle for spending your entire life with a person that you don't really like. I usually think that people can get over cheating and move past it, but you're not even married yet and are already filled with so many doubts. I think you owe it to yourself to see what else/who else might be out there for you. You shouldn't stay with someone out of fear.
yessy21 Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 You need to just tell him " Im Not happy anymore."
yessy21 Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 You cant marry someone who risked you into getting aids because messing around with prostitutes does that to you, it puts you at RIsk. no amount of counseling will help you. sorry. and i guarantee you that he has his happy ending sometimes still.
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