NathanP Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 Bear with me- **FYI- We're both 28** I was in a year relationship, and the girl I dated was in DEEP love with me (after maybe 5-6mos of being in a relationship), although I didn't do much for the relationship to survive and grow (Ya, I know already my mess up!) She had her own place, but only would see her once a week, and spend the night maybe once-twice a month. She loved me for me, though I didn't reciprocate back with flowers, dinners, etc. She'd always be the one planning. You kinda get the drift... So, the breakup- She removed the label around Oct last year, although we were still doing what we were already doing. She tried to force me to change by telling me she wants to be with me, but wont wait for me to change, and that she'll start dating if I don't. I called her bluff for a month, then it happened. She went on a few, and found someone. She confessed to me that she's confused, and wants me, but I'm not showing the love/affection she wants. So after a week or two of talking to the guy, she told me that she decided to try with me, cause she's still in love! Of course, I still F**ked up, and a week later, she was over it. For 1 week, I did everything...flowers every day, letters, crying to her that I do have it in me, etc. Of course...nothing. She said to "let her be, you cant change over night, etc) New guy- She's been dating this guy now since a week after our breakup! (Around new years). This guy is the complete opposite, and only lives a mile away from her (I live about 30mi away). So for the first month, she first started coming REAL cold, asking for her keys back in an email, I'd text to start a mild convo...but cold replies, etc. Same time, she'd comment on my bro's and friends pics on fb and instagram. (Not her friend on fb, but shows on my newsfeed, and her instagram is public which she knows I can see) She started tagging this guy in flower pics he gave her, hiking trips she wanted to take me on, etc. About 3 weeks ago, she finally responded to a text and we had small chit-chat convo, where she even flirted a little! I ended convo. Past 2 weeks, they went to tahoe together, more hiking, more flowers (like every week flowers), and I've thrown a small text every week since the small convo, just saying something small...but no response. And STILL, coincidentally everytime I texted, she comments on pics I'm tagged in during this time. Today, sent her a link on email that I'd knew she'd laugh at. Didn't reply,...but shared it on fb?!? (My friend told me) WTF is going on??? She tags this guy in flowers, dinners, etc saying "best boyfriend ever", "he loves me", "my love", etc. HOW so quick?!? Is there something underlying to her actions?
blotter Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 Nothing is underlying her actions, she's really into her new guy and is moving on. That's your cue to stop all contact and stalking of her online profiles and move on. Whatever contact she is giving you now is just pity, she thinks your pathetic for continuing to contact her even though she is riding someone else's cock. 3
Author NathanP Posted March 19, 2013 Author Posted March 19, 2013 Nothing is underlying her actions, she's really into her new guy and is moving on. That's your cue to stop all contact and stalking of her online profiles and move on. Whatever contact she is giving you now is just pity, she thinks your pathetic for continuing to contact her even though she is riding someone else's cock. ? Stalking? Pity? It's on my newsfeed and I have friends that tell me. Sure disregard all that...I can easily ignore that. Why even bother commenting on my bros n friends pics I'M tagged in if she doesnt care? Why not tell me to stop...instead of sharing it on her fb?
asdfasdf1234 Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 Nothing is underlying her actions, she's really into her new guy and is moving on. That's your cue to stop all contact and stalking of her online profiles and move on. Whatever contact she is giving you now is just pity, she thinks your pathetic for continuing to contact her even though she is riding someone else's cock. This. Move on and block her on FB if you can't stop stalking her. And no, there is no hope. Sorry, but it's the truth.
Author NathanP Posted March 19, 2013 Author Posted March 19, 2013 This. Move on and block her on FB if you can't stop stalking her. And no, there is no hope. Sorry, but it's the truth. NOT stalking. We have 50+ mutual friends, shows on the feed. And what's that matter? That's not my question anyways, lol. I havent done anything to discourage her from going out and being happy. But I WANT her to be happy with me. Hence, why I'm asking about her weird moves? If you don't care, you dont do sh*t. Period. Or am I wrong?
OwlSoul Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 People do move on really fast if they're hurt badly. Especially, if they're happy in a new relationship. I can see that you got really interested in her only when she got distanced.
Author NathanP Posted March 19, 2013 Author Posted March 19, 2013 People do move on really fast if they're hurt badly. Especially, if they're happy in a new relationship. I can see that you got really interested in her only when she got distanced. I dont deny that, to a certain extent-Still be friends with my fam and friends? Comment on things I'm in? If you're happy and over it, then why?
Damaged23 Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 Hi, I think you should stop questioning why she's doing what she's doing. It seems she has moved on, do the same, and stop torturing yourself looking at what she's doing with her new guy.
OwlSoul Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 If you're happy and over it, then why? If you're unhappy and not over it, why not to try to get back? Reverse question, but meh, If she'd really felt it, she'd be back.
denxnis Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 Here's a piece of advice that I could have used a while ago, actions speak louder than words. If she told you that she was in love with you and then continued to see this guy would that change anything? What she is doing says she is happy with where she is at, for now, what she says doesn't really matter right now. 1
asdfasdf1234 Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 NOT stalking. We have 50+ mutual friends, shows on the feed. And what's that matter? That's not my question anyways, lol. I havent done anything to discourage her from going out and being happy. But I WANT her to be happy with me. Hence, why I'm asking about her weird moves? If you don't care, you dont do sh*t. Period. Or am I wrong? I see what you're saying but unfortunately you won't find any solace with that line of thinking as you will never find a reason. You can conjecture all day long and it will do nothing but frustrate you. Trust me I've been there trying to analyze every little move the ex girlfriend made and at the end of the day none of it mattered because she didn't care anymore. And even if she didn't care a little it wasn't enough to change the way things were. That has to be tough having so many mutual friends on Facebook if it were me I would block her its gonna save you a lot of heartache. 1
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