Does Infidelity Begat Infidelity?

[3blindmice]

Just like children who grow up in abusive homes can either go on to be abusers themselves or, as adults, refuse to participate in behavior that is harmful to others, so can children who grow up watching infidelity.

 

Of course, in either case the cycle can be broken. For instance, I grew up watching abuse between my parents and survived severe abuse by my ex husband, however, I don't hit. I don't call names. I don't demean people, or manipulate. Even though I've endured those awful things, I stopped the cycle with myself.

 

I also watched my parents cheat on one another for years, but I'm not a cheater because I chose a different path...one that doesn't hurt others if I can help it.

 

Same thing with me. My first step mother is in a insane ward for killing one of her sons. She did a lot of really bad stuff to us. My dad used to leave us with our step mothers and go on the road for 6 months to a year at a time.

 

My step son from the ago of 2 till 15 used to hit and kick me. I never laid a hand on him. He's 21 and treats me really good now.

[seibert253]

My FWW's dad ended up leaving his family for the OW. He ended up cheating again and D'd his OW.

 

My FWW's mother had an A with a MM. and eventually M'd him.

My FWW's family is as disfunctional as it gets.

 

My parents have been M'd 50+ years FWIW.

[nofool4u]

Does Infidelity Begat Infidelity?

 

No. Only to those who were more than capable of it in the first place.

[CantgetoveritNY]

I'm surprised that no one has chimed in about the "repetition compulsion" theory in psychology. Maybe someone did and I missed it? My WW was a classic example. Her mother cheated (for the first time that she knows about) when she was about 8 years old. When our kids were about that age she started her affair.