Cogee Posted March 18, 2013 Posted March 18, 2013 Wow, I am almost speechless. Word through the grapevine today is that my ex just got engaged to the man she left me for 2 months ago. Their relationship has been moving at light speed by going on a trip together to another country for 4 days 5 days after breaking up with me, in a relationship on facebook 14 days after breaking up with me, and now engaged about 45 days after breaking up with me. And on the day she broke up with me she said there was nobody else when I asked her directly. I don't think they have even met all of each other's friends let alone family and now they are engaged! She is in the middle of her PhD and they are both foreigners to this country so it just seems to fast considering the number of unknowns in their situation! I am beginning to think that she must be pregnant because I don't understand the rush they are in. In fact, it would actually make sense if she got pregnant by him, and that was the catalyst for her ending relations with me. I'm simply stunned!
A n t h o n y Posted March 18, 2013 Posted March 18, 2013 Same thing happened to me. However, lets be honest here, a relationship built on Nothing won't last so don't be surprised if that marriage crumbles. 2
Author Cogee Posted March 18, 2013 Author Posted March 18, 2013 I definitely won't be surprised, in fact I think it's likely she is doing this for the wrong reasons. If I didn't have reason to move on I certainly have it now haha!
Chi townD Posted March 18, 2013 Posted March 18, 2013 Dude, she goes on a trip with him 4-5 days after breaking up with you. No girl does that unless she feels comfortable with that person to travel on that kind of extentive trip without there being something there to begin with. In other words, she was cheating on you. She became emotionally and perhaps physically involved with this guy before she broke it off with you. So, I'm not that surprised. 4
Author Cogee Posted March 18, 2013 Author Posted March 18, 2013 Totally and completely agree Chi townD! I wonder how healthy their relationship will be considering how it started (cheating on me) and having it move at light speed. My gut is telling me that either she is now pregnant, or she was pregnant just before ending things with me. What's definitely clear is that there is a lot of deception!
Chi townD Posted March 18, 2013 Posted March 18, 2013 BINGO!!! With that knowledge in hand, do you really want to be around someone soooo deceptive? On a different note, their relationship won't last. Even if she was cheating on you, in comparsion to the amount of time she's been with him, she really doesn't know him. I think you're coming out ahead.
Author Cogee Posted March 18, 2013 Author Posted March 18, 2013 Definitely do not want to be around her! It's sad to think that the person I knew is no longer there as I could never imagine her doing something like this. She has always been an educated, well reasoned, and emotionally guarded person but this all seems completely against that. I definitely have to be on my guard now because who knows what she really is capable of. And yeah, I have come WAY out ahead in this because not only do I get to reflect back on what I want to improve from the relationship and the lessons learned, I move forward without an emotionally unstable and deceptive person.
Kermit Posted March 18, 2013 Posted March 18, 2013 Same thing happened to me too. My GF and I broke up but we talked about getting back together for a few weeks. The night after she told me she loved me and wanted to be with me and no one else someone asked her on a date. She went. They started a relationship, and she moved in and got engaged to him 5 days later. This guy isnt even around, he left for a 5 month training course. No doubt we werent good for eachother, but its clear she is just using this guy for a place to stay and all that. Plus she has history of making poor decisions and she is back to it very quickly. Shes still technically married to someone else. (She cannot afford the divorce). I tell myself to be happy and thank my lucky star i got out of that relationship with only emotional bruises. It could have been much worse. Your ex, and my ex relationship with their rebound will fail miserably. And only then will they realize what a big mistake they made being such an ******* to us and such a whore. Im sorry to hear about what happened but i know exactly how you feel. Mine was literally 5 days after the separation. How messed up is that. What kind of terrible emotionally unstable people do something like that. 1
knicksdan311 Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 Cogee and Kermit that is pretty crazy, I can sort of relate through. My ex of 4 years just left me after two weeks of being single for a kid that is 6 months away from becoming a doctor. I as well knew we weren't best for each other but it's still tough, she's been staying at his apartment and everything. They will regret the decision, but like Kermit said, only a person that is emotionally unstable would do something like that. I know the feeling of shock and hurt and my situation wasn't as dramatic as yours but I understand. We will all be better in the long run for it.
Sugarkane Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 What sane person actually marries someone after just 2 months? Rebound! I'm surprised that the family hasn't had a go at her and questioned her sanity yet. They should!
h3braica Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 wow! engaged in a little amount of time that kind of relationship wouldn't last. been 3 mos since BU i still feel numb. how can they love and got engaged that fast? maybe they're just using people to cover up the pain.
Author Cogee Posted March 19, 2013 Author Posted March 19, 2013 I strongly suspect she wants a child very fast and that this guy is willing to give that to her. I told her I'd have to graduate first and get a job close to her before I'd be ready for that (which would have all been in place this summer). I wouldn't categorize this as a rebound, I'd say it's more of her falling for this guy while with me and now two honeymooners are not thinking with their heads to make important life decisions. I mean seriously, wanting a baby and marriage with someone after being exclusive for 2 months is NOT rational. I also really wonder what advice she is getting from her parents on this since her family is extremely important in her culture.
Njeanne Posted March 19, 2013 Posted March 19, 2013 It might sound hard to read...but she might have had a emotional affair with him many months before she broke up with you, it is something you will never know. I have seen this on tv where a woman had a affair with her boss for a year, while still being in relationship with her husband and have a child. She finally had the courage of telling it too him a year later and soon married her boss. Best not to break your head over it, she is not worth your time anymore.
Author Cogee Posted March 19, 2013 Author Posted March 19, 2013 Oh, I already know that's the case Njeanne. She and this guy were definitely involved in some capacity since October and they met in September. If I had to hazard a guess I'd say the emotional affair began in late October/early November. Prior to the new year, however, she wasn't at all thinking of children/marriage.
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