Still struggling more than 2 months later after 4 month relationship.

[StraylightRun24]

So here I am still struggling 2 months later after a relationship that only lasted a little under 4 months. Don't get me wrong I've made a ton of progress in trying to move past her and better myself. I run 4 or 5 times a week, I'm signing up to do a tough mudder with some of my friends, started going hiking with said friends every other Saturday morning, and take every opportunity to get out of the house and hang out with friends, but I am missing her and dwelling on what ifs.

 

I knew initially when she broke up with me a few days after Christmas that I was in for a rough ride because I tend to over-analyze things. That's why I turned down her offer of friendship and asking if she could check up on me in a few weeks to see how I was doing. I told her I would like that very much but at that time it was probably best to just cut the chord because I would continue carrying a torch for her while just pretending to be just friends. I also asked her not to contact me and promised her after she started to cry about fearing this was going to be the last time we spoke that I would eventually reach out to her when I was ready.

 

I knew going NC was/is the right course of action. I won't lie there have been a few bumps in the NC road, like looking at her facebook on a couple of occasions (one being today unfortunately), but other then that I haven't called/texted her making myself look desperate. I'm just starting to think I'm falling into a really bad funk. I mean I know and have been reminded by plenty of people that it was a short relationship and I should just chalk it up to a few fun months and move on but I'm really having a hard time getting this girl out of my head.

 

I know that I should be extremely grateful that she actually ended it sooner rather than later and didn't string me along further and break my heart even more. I know all this but I'm still sitting here thinking of her constantly and regardless of all the so-called progress I just feel this feeling of hopelessness is never going to fade....

 

2 months still upset/holding out hope for a girl I was only with for 4 months. I'm just really low and pathetic tonight. This self-pity party should have ended a while ago!

[rollercoster]

dude im on the same boat as you, mines was even shorter, we only lasted 2 months, dont worry it will get better

[Wabisabi]

Me too. My relationship lasted 3 months although I've known him for almost ten years. It was brief but deep. We broke up a week ago and he has gone NC on me. I won't initiate contact but I still miss him.

[Kermit]

I had a 5 month relationship. She left me and got engaged a few days after breaking up with me. Left me shocked and confused. I still am not over it. Its been about 3 months. I think about it everyday. It has gotten better but i am still kind of sick over how betrayed and disrespected I got. I did everything for her. She left me the day after calling me to tell me how much she loved me and needed me. Then the next day, "I dont think we should talk anymore, sorry". 5 days later, engaged and living with some guy she just met. What the hell.

[StraylightRun24]

Hey guys thanks for the responses! Like many of the more experienced posters have said, sometimes these short relationships are extremely hard to get over because we are still in the honeymoon phase and we have loads of hopes and dreams for the future with these people. One minute things seem to be going great and we're on cloud 9. The next thing we're completely in the gutter wondering to ourselves, "What the hell just happened? Was it something I did? Is there something wrong with me," etc.

 

Thinking that way isn't going to help me or any of us for that matter move on. THEY decided to end things between us for their own reasons and we all have to learn to accept that. It just really rattles me to my core when it seemed like things were so wonderful and then it turns out that maybe they were wonderful for me but only just okay for her.

 

It's a shame because when I was around her I was so happy and in those 3 and a half months she in fact made me a better person. Hell maybe that's the reason she came into my life....