robaday Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Posted a month ago about my ex, sending me horrific messages, calling me abusive, while telling me shed struggle not to punch me if she saw me again. Followed up with her asking me for sex (which I declined), after which I ignored the next 5 messages. So I woke yesterday to 3 missed calls, as well as a number of texts, trying to get me to come to her graduation party (I knew shed graduated but after all the insults and character assassination I didnt want to be in touch). It was an important day for her, and under normal circumstances would have contacted her. Ive ignored all of them, the calls, the messages. I wish we could talk without all the anger, hell I would have probably gone, but shes said so much bad bad stuff about me now, that I can't find it in myself to forgive/or engage in conversation with her. Calling someone abusive is horrible, and quite clearly she didnt mean it if shes inviting me for sex, or her graduation parties. This sucks, id love to talk as adults again, but I dont think theres anyway we can ever do that again. Why invite me to a party after cutting me out of her life and telling me she wanted to forget me? what does she seriously expect?
Sososad Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Wow this is very like my ex She's tried to get in touch And went the same way (Bar the offer of sex) Started with nasty texts . Then not so nasty To nice ones To nasty again Pretty much just looking for a reaction In my situation I think they've always known They just need to snap there fingers and we come running But when it doesn't quite work like that They get desperate and panic slightly and this is where These "crazy" actions come from. I think it's clear she wants your attention isn't going about it a very grown up way but that's why I think the desperation is there ! I eventually broke no contact but ended up getting more and more abuse . I honestly don't know what goes on in their heads But kinda refreshing to hear my ex isn't the only one acting nuts ! I'm guessing it was her decision to leave you too? Probably assumed you'd always be there
Author robaday Posted March 17, 2013 Author Posted March 17, 2013 Probably assumed you'd always be there Yeah think she did. But she kinda created this mess in the first place by refusing to work things out with me not once but twice, then cutting all ties, then continuing to criticise me 6 months later. Dont think she realised that by cutting all ties her "punishment" didnt work the way she planned - it just meant I moved on quicker and without any hope that we could work things out. Now 8 months later!! I dont want to work things out with her, and nor am I willing to put in the work to be friends. I feel bad for her. To all those out there suffering, no contact worked for me, it meant that I told myself there was no way we would ever get back together, that it was over for good, I accepted it, faced it head on and dealt with it, and now 8 months later, Im in a better position than the one who broke it off with me - I dont need or want anything from her.
asdfasdf1234 Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Awesome work dude that's not easy. Just don't regress by becoming her friend because that's 1 step away from getting back into a toxic relationship trust me I've been there.
flitzanu Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Posted a month ago about my ex, sending me horrific messages, calling me abusive, while telling me shed struggle not to punch me if she saw me again. Followed up with her asking me for sex (which I declined), after which I ignored the next 5 messages. So I woke yesterday to 3 missed calls, as well as a number of texts, trying to get me to come to her graduation party (I knew shed graduated but after all the insults and character assassination I didnt want to be in touch). It was an important day for her, and under normal circumstances would have contacted her. Ive ignored all of them, the calls, the messages. I wish we could talk without all the anger, hell I would have probably gone, but shes said so much bad bad stuff about me now, that I can't find it in myself to forgive/or engage in conversation with her. Calling someone abusive is horrible, and quite clearly she didnt mean it if shes inviting me for sex, or her graduation parties. This sucks, id love to talk as adults again, but I dont think theres anyway we can ever do that again. Why invite me to a party after cutting me out of her life and telling me she wanted to forget me? what does she seriously expect? maybe she wanted you to show up so she could introduce you to her new boyfriend, or maybe so she could punch you like she said she wanted to do.
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