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Posted

i been seeing this guy for about 3 months, we really like each other, but when i ask about being commited he always comes up with and excuse or says he is taking his time, i think he doesn't want to le me go because he really likes me but at the same he's not ready or he doesn't want the responsability of a commited relationship so i wrote him this letter giving him an ultimatum, i just want your opinion and thoughts about my letter...

 

Dear ******,

 

I know this going to seem a bit out of the blue but is something that my intuition has been telling me to do for a while, or maybe is GOD putting this feeling in my heart for a reason, I been postponing it, I’ve tried to do it but you always come up with a “good” excuse to convince, but not this time I have to listen to what GOD has put in my heart, and specially this morning there was something telling me that I have to do this, basically what I’m trying to say is that we shouldn’t be involved anymore, you know I been through a lot, I know there are some things in life you have to go trough, you can’t go around them, you have to go trough them, but there are some things that we can avoid if we would stop and listen to what our heart is telling us to do, being involved with you is putting my feelings on the line, is putting me in a vulnerable position where I can easily get hurt, your not ready for a commitment right now, that’s fine, I can respect that, I didn’t get involved with you to mess around for a while because as you well know I’m not that type of woman, I got involved because I truly care for you and I really thought we were going somewhere, but I guess I was wrong. I’m not going to allow you to continue to string me along for another couple of months, I don’t want to hear any more excuses from you, you either come to me correctly or you don’t come to me at all, you either want to be in a monogamous relationship or you don’t, is that simple. If your just taking your time like you say you are you can take that time by yourself, or your just have to work on your jealousy issues, then you can time all the time you need, I’m not pressuring you in anyway, but don’t expect me to be involved while you take your “time”. We are Christians, Right?? We are supposed to be peculiar people; right now I think we are both sadly acting like the rest of the world, and we both know why GOD is not pleased with this situation, we should have known better, but we became weak, and GOD knows how very sorry I’ am. I don’t want to hear anymore excuses because I’m honestly tired of them, stop being selfish and be real with me, is either going to be YES or NO, whatever it is I want a solid answer, I don’t to feel confused anymore, remember that GOD is not the author of confusion. Either you want to make this work or you don’t, and when you do have an answer or know where you are going with this call me and let me know, other than that don’t bother to call me, and if your not ready for a relationship right know give me a call when you are, that’s if GOD has not put someone else in my way then we can give things a try.

I also wanted to mention to you what I said on Sunday, I think I just got caught up in the moment, yea there are times when I think I love you, but a lot of times I know I care for you, so I realized I’m not in love because is not a constant feeling. Like I said before take all the time you need and call me only when you are ready to give me a solid answer.

 

Sincerely,

 

M****

Posted

ok you asked for opinions here it goes.

i don't want to blast you ..

but there are somethings that i would like to point out.

 

the letter is respectfull, yes, but there are undertones of anger.

 

the last line stating "im not in love with you" thats a protective dig, and not necessary.

 

than you throw in "his jealousy issues that need to be resolved" i ask why the personal attack.

and yes i read the letter and see that your throwing all his excused back at him.

 

and you stated "I’m not pressuring you in anyway,"

um yes you are, you are threatening that if he doesn't come to you the "correct " way, you will never see him again.

 

the first part of the letter was really nice sounding, and you have every right to ask for what you need.

its the latter part that is off putting. it sounds like you have alot of anger to take care of.

 

also from my perspective reading the letter it sounds like you don't really like him that much.

 

if my BF gave me a letter like that i would never talk to him again, i dont care how good the sex was.

 

that's just my opinion

 

hope your not sorry you asked now.

Posted

And after only about three months??

 

You really should respect a man who wants to take his time.

 

If I got a letter like that after only three months, I would say to myself "thank God I took my time, because this man is NOT for me."

Posted

Not only is 3 months too short of a time to write such a letter, but I suspect if he does make it through the whole letter, his eyes will be bugging out. I only made it half way through. Ever heard of PERIODS, GRAMMAR, and PARAGRAPHS?

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