Javabear Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Here are the parameters of this relationship... tell me if you think it could actually work. He left his long term girlfriend (3 years) for a girl he knew for two weeks. He is 21 years old. The new girl (a year younger than he) was wary about starting a relationship but after a few months they eventually got together. The guy kept in limited contact with his ex the whole time. The guy and the new girl have been together for a couple months but they have to keep it a secret because they work together as Resident Advisers at their university and dating a co-worker is "frowned upon." The guy and the new girl don't have any serious conversations. It's just "fun" and "easy" all the time. All of the mutual friends of the guy and his ex thought the breakup was crazy and out of nowhere. They were supportive of the guy because they were his friends, but ultimately were sad and disappointed that he broke up with this girl who had clearly loved and cared deeply for him for so long. From an as objective standpoint as possible it seems like this is probably a GIGS/rebound situation. I just don't see how anything that isn't serious and has to be kept a secret is a solid foundation for a relationship. Granted, I could be wrong...who can really say what is or isn't solid...but all you rational, logical people out there... opinions?
Simon Phoenix Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Here are the parameters of this relationship... tell me if you think it could actually work. He left his long term girlfriend (3 years) for a girl he knew for two weeks. He is 21 years old. The new girl (a year younger than he) was wary about starting a relationship but after a few months they eventually got together. The guy kept in limited contact with his ex the whole time. The guy and the new girl have been together for a couple months but they have to keep it a secret because they work together as Resident Advisers at their university and dating a co-worker is "frowned upon." The guy and the new girl don't have any serious conversations. It's just "fun" and "easy" all the time. All of the mutual friends of the guy and his ex thought the breakup was crazy and out of nowhere. They were supportive of the guy because they were his friends, but ultimately were sad and disappointed that he broke up with this girl who had clearly loved and cared deeply for him for so long. From an as objective standpoint as possible it seems like this is probably a GIGS/rebound situation. I just don't see how anything that isn't serious and has to be kept a secret is a solid foundation for a relationship. Granted, I could be wrong...who can really say what is or isn't solid...but all you rational, logical people out there... opinions? The rebound might not be on solid ground, but that certainly doesn't mean that the long-term girlfriend would automatically jump into the picture if that relationship died. Just because the rebound doesn't work doesn't mean he's going to go back to you (I'm assuming you are the long-term girlfriend in this situation) when it breaks. He might just want to "soy his royal oats". He might rebound with a rebound from his rebound. It's not something you should put your life on hold for.
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