Ramzk001 Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 She dumped me very cruely due to her own selfish reasons. Ive been following strict NC since 8 months, No single contact. Today I got her message "Hey". Should i reply her? Or what should i do? I still love her and i want to patch up. But she said just "Hey" no apologies. I actually want her to apologize and rub her nose on floor because what she did was wrong. Is she throwing breadcrumbs?. help me!!
Biscous Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Exes always come back lol...I ignored mine for 5-6 months until she started writing complete sentences like 'please talk to me' etc etc. Just wait. 2
Author Ramzk001 Posted March 16, 2013 Author Posted March 16, 2013 Ageed. Break up taught me how to live without her, but I still love her. Btw Ive been dreaming about her alot lately and now shes saying "hey". Cant believe!. I'd wait but waiting would help or not? Just want to be with her.
Biscous Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Ageed. Break up taught me how to live without her, but I still love her. Btw Ive been dreaming about her alot lately and now shes saying "hey". Cant believe!. I'd wait but waiting would help or not? Just want to be with her. It depends on why you two broke up. Some can reconcile, many relationships you cannot.
fancy feast Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 My personal rule for getting back together is if they dumped you, they need to be the ones to put in the effort. As for the "hey" message, I wouldn't think much of it. No use wasting your time worrying over one word.
Author Ramzk001 Posted March 16, 2013 Author Posted March 16, 2013 The reason was GIGS and her immaturity. I don't know if she still has GIGS
Author Ramzk001 Posted March 16, 2013 Author Posted March 16, 2013 Why do they give breadcrumbs? Before dumping me, she was insanely in love with me. She could be missing me?. What is the different between missing someone and giving breadcrumbs? (I love her so much )
Amelie1980 Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 My personal rule for getting back together is if they dumped you, they need to be the ones to put in the effort. As for the "hey" message, I wouldn't think much of it. No use wasting your time worrying over one word. So what would you do if you got a super nice email from him saying among other things: > Making the decision to split with you was one of the hardest and most > deep down difficult things I have ever done. It may well be the > biggest regret I have looking back in the future. > I will always think of you fondly now and evermore.
pushforward Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Why do they give breadcrumbs? Before dumping me, she was insanely in love with me. She could be missing me?. What is the different between missing someone and giving breadcrumbs? (I love her so much ) I'm in the same boat as you my friend. Think of it this way, if she was so insanely in love with you, why did she break up with you? You gotta face the facts. It's going to be tough, I know I'm having such a difficult time accepting reality too but it's the best way to move forward with MY life. 1
Amelie1980 Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 'sorry but i am with someone else now. Addio!' Seriously....how about something more constructive?
travelonic Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 the love ends the moment the relation ends. What remains is the ego. Your ego makes u think u love her, u dont lover her. let me repeat that - YOU DONT LOVE HER and neither does she. I'd say it depends on the people, the relationship, WH it ended, HOW it ended - IMO, just a blanket "no it isn't love" [or a "yes, it IS love" for that matter], IMO, is just too simplified. 1
Author Ramzk001 Posted March 16, 2013 Author Posted March 16, 2013 Sometimes its hard to accept the reality when you love someone so much. I did strict NC. But i used to wait every time that she'd message me. I know i cannot reply to her "hey". Cant be her security blanket. I want her to start speaking, Something in me is scared that she tried to contact me now and if i didn't reply, i might never hear from her ever again. NC taught me how to live alone but we had similar personalities, I know i cant find someone like her and its hard to live alone. When you love someone you have meaning for your life. But you're right! Huhh, Practicing self discipline, I won't reply. I'll wait.
A n t h o n y Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Don't respond to that unless you want to give her all the power. She's just checking to see if you're still around. If she wanted to fix things with you she would do everything she could to talk to you. Saying "hey" is nothing more than a breadcrumb and honestly it would just piss me off. 1
Minneloa Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Stay strong. This is the tiniest possible breadcrumb. I recommend waiting her out. If she has something substantive to say, she'll eventually say it. 1
Author Ramzk001 Posted March 16, 2013 Author Posted March 16, 2013 Stay strong. This is the tiniest possible breadcrumb. I recommend waiting her out. If she has something substantive to say, she'll eventually say it. Okay. but what if she never messages me again?
Simon Phoenix Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Okay. but what if she never messages me again? Then it means the "hey" message was a bunch of bulls--t. "Hey" is not a worthy message after eight months.
Minneloa Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 From what you posted about her--that she was selfish and cruel to you--I'd say that you're better off without her. It seems that you have mixed feelings towards her. Part of you wants her back, and part of you wants her to apologize so you can "rub her face in it." Give this ambivalence, I'd just continue NC unless she offers a sincere apology for her behavior and treatment of you. And even then, I would tread carefully.
pushforward Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Okay. but what if she never messages me again? I believe you aren't realizing that it's over. You've already lost her. You have to focus on yourself and go NC for yourself. No tool will win your ex back. If someone wanted to be with you, they'd do anything in their power to be with you. Breadcrumbs, you deserve better.
Simon Phoenix Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Yeah, if a "hey" message gets you out of sorts after eight months of NC, then you haven't exactly used NC properly and made the most of it.
Author Ramzk001 Posted March 16, 2013 Author Posted March 16, 2013 Yeah, if a "hey" message gets you out of sorts after eight months of NC, then you haven't exactly used NC properly and made the most of it. Whatelse I couldve done to use NC more properly that i didnt talk to her or had absolutely no contact for 8 months. Although i know that hey isnt enough but Im quite sure i do love her. Im not breaking this NC for just a "Hey and a fullstop" I want an apology because she ended great relationship which gave her respect and success. Even she was self and mean to me in that last month, I'll forgive her if she apologize sincerely.
fancy feast Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 So what would you do if you got a super nice email from him saying among other things: > Making the decision to split with you was one of the hardest and most > deep down difficult things I have ever done. It may well be the > biggest regret I have looking back in the future. > I will always think of you fondly now and evermore. That email basically reads to me as "I feel bad". I'd hardly consider it an attempt to repair a relationship. If I received that from my ex girlfriend, I would probably ignore it (and that's a reaction based on my own history). One of the most disappointing things I see is how people are contacted once by someone who dumped them, and they immediately put their energy into winning them back. I would much rather carry on with my life, and let the other person try to win me over.
Simon Phoenix Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Whatelse I couldve done to use NC more properly that i didnt talk to her or had absolutely no contact for 8 months. Although i know that hey isnt enough but Im quite sure i do love her. Im not breaking this NC for just a "Hey and a fullstop" I want an apology because she ended great relationship which gave her respect and success. Even she was self and mean to me in that last month, I'll forgive her if she apologize sincerely. You didn't work on you. You basically sat there for eight months hoping she'd contact you. That's not the point of No Contact. And quite honestly, if you used NC to work on you, then you wouldn't care if she gave you an apology. Because you would have moved past it. 1
Author Ramzk001 Posted March 16, 2013 Author Posted March 16, 2013 You didn't work on you. You basically sat there for eight months hoping she'd contact you. That's not the point of No Contact. And quite honestly, if you used NC to work on you, then you wouldn't care if she gave you an apology. Because you would have moved past it. I followed rules given in this forum and learned from many of your posts aswell. Im just confused, NC is a thing yea but you cannot erased someone from your mind. Its hard, cant change natural feelings. If i hadnt work on myself i would have replied her by now. Im here to discuss every possibility.
Simon Phoenix Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 I followed rules given in this forum and learned from many of your posts aswell. Im just confused, NC is a thing yea but you cannot erased someone from your mind. Its hard, cant change natural feelings. If i hadnt work on myself i would have replied her by now. Im here to discuss every possibility. Of course you can't erase, but you are freaking out about a "hey" post. A "hey" post means nothing at all. I mean, you asked "what if she never sends another message?" if you don't respond to the "hey" post. That's fear talking. After eight months you shouldn't be thinking out of fear. You should be thinking "Is she worthy of receiving a message from me", not worried about the ramifications of you not reaching out to a weak text on her part. NC is about not "needing" the other person. 2
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