Necris Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 (edited) I think all this comes down to initial attraction the reason why some guys can get away with grabbing a random girl's butt is due to the fact she already finds him initially attractive so this close sexual touching arouses her, for any other guy this would result in her feeling violated. Plus the women who like having their butts grabbed probably already have low defenses up anyway so are more likely to welcome this kind of touch, and for the OP's story its obvious the women this guy touches are quite comfortable with him so this isn't like a stranger grabbing her butt. Personally I'd feel uncomfortable with violating her personal space like that so I wouldn't do it, plus its hard enough to get women to be more comfortable and friendly with me slapping butts I don't think would help for a guy like myself who isn't just naturally "smooth" like some guys. Plus I've never met a woman attracted to me so I doubt she would find my touch welcoming in the slightest. Edited March 17, 2013 by Necris
SpiralOut Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Any guy who did that to me would get yelled and screamed at, maybe even a punch in the face. Totally not cool at all.
apple OR orange Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 The woman being slapped has grounds for kicking the living the tar out the assailant on this basis (self defense). Cos its ok to do it back if you had it done to you... bad idea... another 101 idea from the country that said guns are fine, hummm, see how that turned out... I have to say, most countries that have a monarchy seem to be better off (as humans are built and like order).
Necris Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 (edited) Cos its ok to do it back if you had it done to you... bad idea... another 101 idea from the country that said guns are fine, hummm, see how that turned out... I have to say, most countries that have a monarchy seem to be better off (as humans are built and like order). Most of the posters on the internet claiming they'll "kick the tar out of him" or some such in a real-life situation would do very little at best maybe yell at the person. But needless to say if some random unattractive man a woman doesn't know starts slapping her butt she won't be very pleased. Not sure what guns have to do with this, but time and time again the problem with gun control is that banning guns actually doesn't decrease crime. It just removes guns away from the law abiding citizens. Harvard Study: Gun Control Is Counterproductive I've just learned that Washington, D.C.'s petition for a rehearing of the Parker case in the U.S. Court of Appeals for the D.C. Circuit was denied today. This is good news. Readers will recall in this case that the D.C. Circuit overturned the decades-long ban on gun ownership in the nation's capitol on Second Amendment grounds. However, as my colleague Peter Ferrara explained in his National Review Online article following the initial decision in March, it looks very likely that the United States Supreme Court will take the case on appeal. When it does so - beyond seriously considering the clear original intent of the Second Amendment to protect an individual's right to armed self-defense - the justices of the U.S. Supreme Court would be wise to take into account the findings of a recent study out of Harvard. The study, which just appeared in Volume 30, Number 2 of the Harvard Journal of Law & Public Policy (pp. 649-694), set out to answer the question in its title: "Would Banning Firearms Reduce Murder and Suicide? A Review of International and Some Domestic Evidence." Contrary to conventional wisdom, and the sniffs of our more sophisticated and generally anti-gun counterparts across the pond, the answer is "no." And not just no, as in there is no correlation between gun ownership and violent crime, but an emphatic no, showing a negative correlation: as gun ownership increases, murder and suicide decreases. Edited March 17, 2013 by Necris
Els Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 I actually agree with this. I was recently out for a beer with some of the ppl from school. 3 girls, 2 guys. 31 [single, cute looking, petite], 21 [single, cute looking, curvy], 28 [bf, also curvy] the ages of the girls. 30 and 28, the ages of the guys. The other guy takes good care of himself, works as a security guard [a bit above the average grunt], is married and has 2 kids. Pics on his cellphone of the kids and wife. Then things started appearing : - he lost his wedding ring a while back - he started playing with the 21yr old - 20min late he was very touchy feely with her - another 20min, and he had his hands all over her There was no slap, but i have a feeling that both me and the other girls knew what was going on. I'm happy that i found what he was doing quite disgusting from a moral pov ... he's married with kids. I'm also happy i did not say anything [very important] and that i managed to fight my usual recluse self. It was very interesting watching him work on seducing her, i'm sure she had some fantasies that night. Sure it happens. Whether it's taken positively or responded to with a slap depends on plenty of factors, though - the man and woman involved, location, context, etc. Some jerks, despite having no morals, can be quite socially adept and very good at reading context and overall vibes, knowing which women would most likely go for it and which ones would be affronted, and knowing how to pull it off. I'd personally throw a ****fest at anyone who tried, but I can definitely see some less inhibited women giggling it off if there had already been chemistry and flirting beforehand. Unfortunately the men on this thread who are voting for it because they've seen 'successful' guys pull it off are the MOST likely ones to end up with a sexual harassment suit for doing the same thing, because they are unable to see and understand all of that. 3
TaraMaiden Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 I personally don't believe the question can possibly be genuine, myself. Really? In 2013? REALLY?? This is unthinkable and inconceivable, truly. Any guy nowadays doing that risks a whole lot more than he bargained for. And not in a good way.
GoodOnPaper Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Sure it happens. Whether it's taken positively or responded to with a slap depends on plenty of factors, though - the man and woman involved, location, context, etc. Some jerks, despite having no morals, can be quite socially adept and very good at reading context and overall vibes, knowing which women would most likely go for it and which ones would be affronted, and knowing how to pull it off. I'd personally throw a ****fest at anyone who tried, but I can definitely see some less inhibited women giggling it off if there had already been chemistry and flirting beforehand. Unfortunately the men on this thread who are voting for it because they've seen 'successful' guys pull it off are the MOST likely ones to end up with a sexual harassment suit for doing the same thing, because they are unable to see and understand all of that. Best answer, hands down. When you are at learning-disability level at flirting, it's frustrating to see guys who have mastered the art of being too forward but not so much that women would risk confrontation and call them on it. However, it's best to try and learn a form of banter that doesn't border on sexual harassment so much. 1
NeoGen85 Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Uhhh, this is the kind of stuff you do very light and after many dates when she is in a good mood and you have already tried other playfull things. Basically when someone gives you acces to their personal space. It's the kind of thing you want to do when you are sure or close to sure it will work, or when you can pass it off as a joke [though good luck with this]. Otherwise, intruding into the personal space would feel to the other person as a ... violation of their privacy. Honestly, you need to experience this first hand to understand it. And then you'll understand why the other person might view it as assault. I definitely agree. There was a girlfriend I had who wasn't into that unless I played my cards right. We'd go out downtown with friends, dance together, and have a couple of drinks. We're just having a really good night. She starts saying naughty things, and I might reply with a slap on her ass. That's all fun.
Els Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 I definitely agree. There was a girlfriend I had who wasn't into that unless I played my cards right. We'd go out downtown with friends, dance together, and have a couple of drinks. We're just having a really good night. She starts saying naughty things, and I might reply with a slap on her ass. That's all fun. Dude, she's already your girlfriend. There's a huge difference between having one's bf do that and a guy you just met do that. 1
jma500 Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 I don't know if anyone recalls the TV show "Eliminidate" where a woman goes out with 3 guys (or was it 5)? It was whittled down to 2 guys, one guy was a gentleman-like, civilized human being that would indeed by the long term boyfriend (even husband) material for this woman. The other was some jock douche'. They were all in a hot tub together talking....then the jock decides to do a GENIUS move....he takes his swim trunks off....they blur out his "member" and he wiggles his penis in her face. The "nice guy" thinks "What a douche bag, I got this woman....EASY...easy win for me! Yay!" Then, at the end of the show.....she picks her final man. Guess who it was. The dick wiggler. LOL It was that edgy, bad boy, alpha male MOVE he made to win her over. All you need to know about this: 1- its a tv show and all tv shows have a script. This script detailed the battle between the good guy and the douche. A media favorite. The media has polarized men and women in that guys believe women only go for the douche when nothing could be further from the truth. 2 - reality tv shows feature only the sleaziest, sluttiest people behaving at their worst for their fifteen minutes of fame. P.s. dollars to doughnuts the gentleman is also a douche. The script called for a gentleman and this man simply played the part. None of this reflects on real life. 2
ThaWholigan Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 To be honest, I've had my own ass slapped/grabbed by girls more than the other way around.
ThaWholigan Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Understandably TW, you're one hot tamale! (it's a bit disconcerting when it's coming from someone you don't want it from or aren't interested in though, isn't it?) Yes it is! I don't mind it too much, I'm easily flattered but being hypertactile (product of autism) means being touched unexpectedly has unpredictable results . I prefer the slap .
jma500 Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 That seems to be a key point that our less savvy male posters are overlooking. I wouldn't have a problem at all with a partner slapping my ass. In fact, I'd be mighty disappointed if he didn't! A stranger, or some Tom Slick slimeball that I've barely just met, however, is probably going to walk away holding a few of his teeth in his hands if he lays a hand on me. And, yeah, I've had the pleasure... You sound like a good friend/coworker i used to have until she moved to san diego with her naval officer husband. I was the property manager and she was resident service coordinator for an elddrly/disabled apartment building. One day i was talking with her in the office and the maintenace guy walked and put his arms around her trying to impress me. What he got in return was a good, hard shot to in the ribs. He took off red faced and obviously in pain. I then asked her if she wanted to press sexual assualt charges with our superiors. She said no. He never tried anything with her again. 1
TaraMaiden Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Yeah, well that's not sexual harassment or assault. That's a huge "come on big boy, I like you, and what you're made of!" It's also a hugely glaring double-standard... rather like views on how many ex-partners it's 'decent' for a man to have, as opposed to the number a woman should decently have..... You know.... Prejudice. Weighing the facts with your thumb on the scales.....
soccerrprp Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 You sound like a good friend/coworker i used to have until she moved to san diego with her naval officer husband. I was the property manager and she was resident service coordinator for an elddrly/disabled apartment building. One day i was talking with her in the office and the maintenace guy walked and put his arms around her trying to impress me. What he got in return was a good, hard shot to in the ribs. He took off red faced and obviously in pain. I then asked her if she wanted to press sexual assualt charges with our superiors. She said no. He never tried anything with her again. This CAN be construed as SEXUAL ASSAULT! A number of factors must be in place, but this can be seen as sexual assault. Too many people don't FULLY understand the statute that describes what does and doesn't constitute assault and that's why work places have to constantly mandate such training every year. 1. There was UNSOLICITED or UN-INVITED touching 2. It occurred in the workplace 3. It was clear that she did not enjoy the touching. This could lead to discomfort or perceived/actual hostile workplace. Now from what you describe, we don't know if this was the first time he'd done this or with other ladies. If there is a pattern of such behavior, oh heck yeah, sexual assault.
Krieger Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 I just say hey girl nice shoes want to bang? it work well for me
jma500 Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 This CAN be construed as SEXUAL ASSAULT! A number of factors must be in place, but this can be seen as sexual assault. Too many people don't FULLY understand the statute that describes what does and doesn't constitute assault and that's why work places have to constantly mandate such training every year. 1. There was UNSOLICITED or UN-INVITED touching 2. It occurred in the workplace 3. It was clear that she did not enjoy the touching. This could lead to discomfort or perceived/actual hostile workplace. Now from what you describe, we don't know if this was the first time he'd done this or with other ladies. If there is a pattern of such behavior, oh heck yeah, sexual assault. She was the only young woman working for us. He hadn't tried it before with her. I accidently omitted that he was rubbing her with his hands at the same time he was embracing her. Which is why i asked her if she wished to press sexual assault charges.
charlietheginger Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Football players do that .... Never could figure that one out
Author irc333 Posted March 17, 2013 Author Posted March 17, 2013 Fortunately for him, this environment wasn't a work place environment. This CAN be construed as SEXUAL ASSAULT! A number of factors must be in place, but this can be seen as sexual assault. Too many people don't FULLY understand the statute that describes what does and doesn't constitute assault and that's why work places have to constantly mandate such training every year. 1. There was UNSOLICITED or UN-INVITED touching 2. It occurred in the workplace 3. It was clear that she did not enjoy the touching. This could lead to discomfort or perceived/actual hostile workplace. Now from what you describe, we don't know if this was the first time he'd done this or with other ladies. If there is a pattern of such behavior, oh heck yeah, sexual assault. a woman doesn't know If you had read the post....this woman DOES know the guy, completely different scenario altogether. You have to know the person well enough to pull it off.
Feelin Frisky Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 That is not PC. Not for a long time. And even when it was, it might have been the type of thing everyone except a ho would secretly if not overtly object to. The nerve of doing that to a stranger. I'm not even one for that as sex-play with someone I know. The first time I balled my ex fiance, show used both hand to slap my ass while I was in her. I did not like that one damn bit. I'm not a sobmissive man. I'm dominant. But not brutish and smart enough to not take liberties that clearly subordinate someone else. I don't have to prove I'm stronger and bigger. Although some times it seems I have to prove I can be trusted to be gentle and a gentleman.
kaylan Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 If its a women you a seeing, Yes. If its a woman you arent seeing, then you look like a pig and may be smacked or arrested. Is this guy from the 1920s? You cant slap women you arent dating on the butt like in those days and expect nothing bad to happen. "Tootz get me a soda pop"...the waitress will have you kicked out.
Author irc333 Posted March 17, 2013 Author Posted March 17, 2013 If its a women you a seeing, Yes. If its a woman you arent seeing, then you look like a pig and may be smacked or arrested. Is this guy from the 1920s? You cant slap women you arent dating on the butt like in those days and expect nothing bad to happen. "Tootz get me a soda pop"...the waitress will have you kicked out. Well, he can get away with it, because the women are comfortable with him, he's known some of them for years, so it's no big whoop to them actually.
kaylan Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 Well, he can get away with it, because the women are comfortable with him, he's known some of them for years, so it's no big whoop to them actually. Ok, then its still weird, but no a big issue. I have a couple of friends (male or female) Ive known a while who do this. And I may do it too from time to time. But its usually for laughs, not for sexual tension. Like my chick friend will go "nice ass kay" and slap me for a laugh. Or my guy friend will go "good play Kay" and slap my ass even though we are only playing Madden...lmao. If a guy isnt seeing a girl, I cant see how slapping a friend on the bottom will build tension. He seems a tad weird tbh
kaylan Posted March 17, 2013 Posted March 17, 2013 I don't know if anyone recalls the TV show "Eliminidate" where a woman goes out with 3 guys (or was it 5)? It was whittled down to 2 guys, one guy was a gentleman-like, civilized human being that would indeed by the long term boyfriend (even husband) material for this woman. The other was some jock douche'. They were all in a hot tub together talking....then the jock decides to do a GENIUS move....he takes his swim trunks off....they blur out his "member" and he wiggles his penis in her face. The "nice guy" thinks "What a douche bag, I got this woman....EASY...easy win for me! Yay!" Then, at the end of the show.....she picks her final man. Guess who it was. The dick wiggler. LOL It was that edgy, bad boy, alpha male MOVE he made to win her over. Yeah, and Ive watched gold diggers on the Bachelor. Doesnt mean thats how most people work. Its tv brah. You think dudes are worried about a skank who chases guys who throw their penis in her face?
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