sweetkiwi Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 If I was handsome then I would be confident, but I'm not. I'm also 5'6 so being short doesn't help, so that has affected my confidence as well. Okay you've told me what you dont like. How about what you DO like??
Keenly Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 I've sent out hundreds of messages. Consisting of conversation topics based on information in their profile, their pictures, sprinkled with jokes, witty humor, and things we have in common. One of two things always happens. Either she reads it, views my profile, doesn't respond. Or she reads it, a paragraph or more of text, and replies with "thanks, yeah me too" Pisses me off when these women are there to meet new people bit.they dont understand how a conversation works .
Soxfaninfl Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Okay you've told me what you dont like. How about what you DO like?? I am an easy going person and very down to earth. I am an affectionate person, and I have a big heart. I am a hopeless romantic and a gentleman. I love chick flicks. I'm very generous person and always go all out on birthdays, anniversarys and holidays. I spend to much and get myself into trouble. I'm a good listener and a compassionate person. I always aim to please. Im happy when my women is happpy. I have a high sex drive also. When I'm in a relationship I beleive everything is 50/50. Like for example cleaning, cooking and taking care of the kids. I basically do half of everything. I never expect a women to do all the coking and cleaning. I like to show my love by doing nice things too for my SO.
sweetkiwi Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 I am an easy going person and very down to earth. I am an affectionate person, and I have a big heart. I am a hopeless romantic and a gentleman. I love chick flicks. I'm very generous person and always go all out on birthdays, anniversarys and holidays. I spend to much and get myself into trouble. I'm a good listener and a compassionate person. I always aim to please. Im happy when my women is happpy. I have a high sex drive also. When I'm in a relationship I beleive everything is 50/50. Like for example cleaning, cooking and taking care of the kids. I basically do half of everything. I never expect a women to do all the coking and cleaning. I like to show my love by doing nice things too for my SO. Those are great qualities!! What can you do?? Like rip a phonebook in two with your bare hands. Make the best Cosmo in the tri state area. Etc. What can you create. That you're proud of?? Accomplishments that give you a sense of joy and peace?? When it comes down to it thats what people want. Doers. Movers. Shakers. And sometimes money makers. I think you are a good guy. From things I've read that you've posted. But somehow you have to convince yourself, or simply ***see***, that you are a great catch. Build yourself up. Do things that reaffirm your self worth. 2
miss_jaclynrae Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Grab your attention? You know do you have to be interesting too right? Unless you have one of those golden.... Do you look at his profile to talk about something or is it all about you? I Love how some men on here take a quote and twist it any way possible as to make the woman seem like whatever you portray them to be. No. I have a horrible personality. It's probably why old has sucked for me. *rolleyes 2
pbjbear Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 This is the Internet people. I laugh at all of you men calling us women who come here and give advice that doesnt match yours uptight. This is the Internet people. Just because I figured out alot of men are shallow and use women and tell it to people here doesnt make me uptight. You really cant judge someones personality by what they write here...people give their thoughts on dating here. I know lots of people who have a hard time with dating who dont easily trust others who are anything but uptight. I get called the "fun girl" in my circle all the time. You wouldnt know here. I dont come here to show my "fun side" Some of the woman haters on this site could have more pleasant personalities in real life than you think. Conversely, there were some peeps on OLD who seemed fun based on what they wrote and turnedout not to be
PhillyDude Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Thank god for my golden vagina. Some women think that's all they need to bring to a relationship which is why match.com will always be in business
miss_jaclynrae Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Some women think that's all they need to bring to a relationship which is why match.com will always be in business That's the only thing going for me. You must be right. 1
Soxfaninfl Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Those are great qualities!! What can you do?? Like rip a phonebook in two with your bare hands. Make the best Cosmo in the tri state area. Etc. What can you create. That you're proud of?? Accomplishments that give you a sense of joy and peace?? When it comes down to it thats what people want. Doers. Movers. Shakers. And sometimes money makers. I think you are a good guy. From things I've read that you've posted. But somehow you have to convince yourself, or simply ***see***, that you are a great catch. Build yourself up. Do things that reaffirm your self worth. Thanks sweetkiwi. 1
PhillyDude Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 That's the only thing going for me. You must be right. What happens after sex is OVER? Are u able to have a conversation with each other? Sex is just one part of a relationship
Author kaylan Posted March 16, 2013 Author Posted March 16, 2013 Or maybe Kaylan, some of these men might actually be trying to learn how to be less superficial.... have learned that pictures don't tell the whole story... and lots of other things you may not have thought about. The best guys I met when I was doing OLD was when I had NO pictures whatsoever. Um no. She said shes getting spammed with unoriginal or boring messages. So guys arent being less superficial. They are just playing the numbers game because of how picky many girls are on OLD. You should see the inbox of some guys on the bodybuilding.com forums. They kinda back up the idea that many girls (esp ones not in their league) message only the best looking dudes. Pictures means the most in online dating...especially a site like POF. Whenever a girl messages me, its rare she mentions something from my profile. She usually comments on my pics or says something lame and generic like "hey whats up? hows your day?"
miss_jaclynrae Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 What happens after sex is OVER? Are u able to have a conversation with each other? Sex is just one part of a relationship Why have a conversation? Especially when I can just make him a sandwich? 2
PhillyDude Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Why have a conversation? Especially when I can just make him a sandwich? So basically you are not relationship material, i see
MrCastle Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Why have a conversation? Especially when I can just make him a sandwich? I feel like this is a sarcastic post. 2
miss_jaclynrae Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Um no. She said shes getting spammed with unoriginal or boring messages. So guys arent being less superficial. They are just playing the numbers game because of how picky many girls are on OLD. You should see the inbox of some guys on the bodybuilding.com forums. They kinda back up the idea that many girls (esp ones not in their league) message only the best looking dudes. Pictures means the most in online dating...especially a site like POF. Whenever a girl messages me, its rare she mentions something from my profile. She usually comments on my pics or says something lame and generic like "hey whats up? hows your day?" I always read men's profiles, the ones I messages and the ones who messages me. Unless of course their message was unreadable or unbearable.
MrCasanova Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 I found the profile of an old college friend of mine on POF and decided to message her just to say whats up. Its her first time using online dating and I was surprised when she told me she cant keep up with the messages. No offense to her, but in my view shes a 5...maybe a 6 at best. Thats if I had to use the number system. If I had to articulate it, Id say that I wouldnt sleep with her even if I was tipsy. Shes a great gal, but not someone I find attractive. That being said, it appears people are right when saying a girl can be super plain or not all that attractive and get loads of attention online. Its amazing how OLD turns the dating world on its head. Seems guys just message any girl. Christ...if dudes actually showed some selective-ness itd solve the problem most of them have with OLD. Well, men have a variety of tastes, naturally. I also don't find it weird that most women get message bombed. I'm sure it's mostly because most men don't talk to women in real life. I'm sure their odds would be better if they did that. Mainly because you have a chance to make your own unique impression, and put on a display of the real you. The one text can't do alone.
miss_jaclynrae Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 All this generalization.... I could say all men do is mass message, but that really isn't the case considering how many dates I have landed from old. All of them quality as well. Some men actually do read your profile and are genuinely interested. The numbers aren't high, OKC had the most. Funny messages that showed personality and referenced something on my page. I'm seriously considering logging into my old one and proving it to the guys on here that personalized messages work much better.
PhillyDude Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 I always read men's profiles, the ones I messages and the ones who messages me. Unless of course their message was unreadable or unbearable. How would you respond to this message? "Can I have a kiss?" LOL That is a nice ice breaker if there is mutual attraction
MrCastle Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 All this generalization.... I could say all men do is mass message, but that really isn't the case considering how many dates I have landed from old. All of them quality as well. Some men actually do read your profile and are genuinely interested. The numbers aren't high, OKC had the most. Funny messages that showed personality and referenced something on my page. I'm seriously considering logging into my old one and proving it to the guys on here that personalized messages work much better. Don't take offense to this as it's not meant to offend, but you're different than most women. Haven't you said you cold approach men? Not a whole lot of women do that. Among other things you've said about yourself that make you stand out from others. I know of guys who spend time thinking of personalized, witty messages, and while some women may respond back out of being nice, it doesn't lead to dates. I know of guys who mass message and get dates.
Author kaylan Posted March 16, 2013 Author Posted March 16, 2013 jackie doesnt seem to get it. Women doesnt respond to personalized messages most of the time. Personalization isnt the key. Pictures and attraction is. The problem for many guys, is that even if a girl may be attracted to him in the real world...online many girls are thinking they can do better, esp with all the messages they get. If a guy gets a girl tingly down there, his profile can be crap and his messages can be generic. Theres plenty of threads online showing this to be true. Pics are the key here with OLD 2
MrCastle Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 If a guy gets a girl tingly down there, his profile can be crap and his messages can be generic. Theres plenty of threads online showing this to be true. This. There have been so many social experiments done with OLD. Hell, even OKC has some stats that prove the above to be true. I always joke though that the reason men have low response rates is because they are messaging other men who are posing as women to conduct an experiment.
RedRobin Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Um no. She said shes getting spammed with unoriginal or boring messages. So guys arent being less superficial. They are just playing the numbers game because of how picky many girls are on OLD. You should see the inbox of some guys on the bodybuilding.com forums. They kinda back up the idea that many girls (esp ones not in their league) message only the best looking dudes. Pictures means the most in online dating...especially a site like POF. Whenever a girl messages me, its rare she mentions something from my profile. She usually comments on my pics or says something lame and generic like "hey whats up? hows your day?" Ok... if a woman had no pictures posted and drafted a creative message to you... would you email her back? Because that is what I did when I was doing OLD. Having no pictures ceased the spam, and gave me the opportunity to focus on men I thought I'd have genuine compatibility with.
truth_seeker Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Why have a conversation? Especially when I can just make him a sandwich? This gave me a boner. 3
fortyninethousand322 Posted March 16, 2013 Posted March 16, 2013 Look, women in general do not care about a man's personality, what movies and music he likes, or his thoughts on 19th century furniture styles. What they really want to know is "are you a man?". It's very difficult for all but a few men to convey this over the internet medium. I've written messages that were personalized and reflected the fact that I did indeed read their profile. In the case of OKC I check the questions comparability to make sure we aren't glaringly mismatched. Very very rarely do I get a response, and even more rarely do I get a girl to agree to meet up (the last time being in February 2011). In fact by best "prospect" from OLD is a girl who lives in another country who won't agree to chat via webcam. So yeah, OLD causes men to become desperate. I don't want to hear any any complaining about creeps who are OLD sites. Because frankly it's really sad that anyone would complain about that when they more than likely receive several decent messages from men they deem undesirable for one reason or another. 3
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