seductress989 Posted September 8, 2004 Posted September 8, 2004 [font=arial][/font] Hello, again everyone. I have a new problem with my ex. I was wondering if I should believe him when he said that "he still had feelings for me". It has been 3 months since our breakup and we've continued seeing each other as friends w/benefits. I know it's wrong, but we have an intense physical attraction toward one another. He told me that he still had feelings for me after I told him that I didn't want to be a friend w/benefits anymore. He also said that "he can't just lose them (feelings)" even though it's been 3 months. Should I believe him? If you want to know more about the situation, ask. He also said that now "he's afraid of commitment and he wouldn't have time for a relationship. That is believable b/c he goes to college full-time and has a full-time job just like me. We are both extremely busy. I don't know if I should talk to him anymore or not. I don't want to be hurt anymore. What should I do? I would appreciate any advice.
snilljente Posted September 8, 2004 Posted September 8, 2004 Well, I am not sure about who broke up with who and all of the details, but he has time to see you..he's doing it now....it sounds to me like he just doesn't want the label of boyfriend and girlfriend...the friends with benefits thing is torturous if you still have feelings for him, been there done that....
Merin Posted September 8, 2004 Posted September 8, 2004 Well, If he doesn't have the time for a relationship, a committed one then I would tell him that you don't have time to have indulge his "benefits package" any longer. You obviously still have a lot of deep feelings for this guy,and if you continue to be intimate with him knowing that is all he is offering you, you without question are going to continue to be hurt by this. It means something to you (and it's more than a physical attraction for you) and it doesn't mean the same thing to him. Obviously he is able to find the time to get the benefits of a "friendship" so i'm going to go waaayyyy out on a limb here and say if he has time for that, then he has time for a relationship and for him to say anything different is him trying to manipulate you, because he knows you care about him and you don't want to loose him even a little. Not okay! If you wish to try to be his friend, then that is all you. But please for your own sanity tell him that the "benefits package" is just costing you to much and that is no longer on the table.
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